Prologue & Epilogue

    Cup my heart in your hands

    Mold it to your palms

    I drown in your embrace

    You wash over my skin

    Gentle strength

    Envelope me

    Within and Without

    I look up at you

    Your eyes knowing, expectant

    An invisible string tied to my sternum

    You tug, I tug

    The energy flows

    Both ways

    North and South

    I thought I knew

    I knew, but I grew

    You fill me to the brim

    I find I can be ever more

    Boundless as the sea

    We are the waves

    Spume and Chasm

    How deep is thy love

    Full and round

    Like jasmine and moonlight

    On my tongue

    You are my sun

    And I your moon

    Twilight and Dawn

    And now, my Love

    As we begin

    I’ve known you for a hundred years

    The perfect, yet unplanned

    My hands, your face, your sweet embrace

    Our pages yet unfurled

    Prologue and Epilogue

    st3punc13

    ABDL: Friends vs. Fandom

    In the ABDL community, there is a distinction between individuals who create content and those who are here to foster legitimate friendships and relationships. While there may be friendly models and content creators, it's important to remember that their purpose is to create content and not necessarily to form personal relationships. Too many people in this community try to turn the friendlies into models and models into friends, which can lead to confusion and misunderstandings. It's important to respect the boundaries of others and to focus on building genuine connections with individuals who share your interests and values.

    While the art of the ABDL community is special and can be a valuable source of inspiration, it's important to recognize and respect the difference between the media that people share and the people behind that media. Just as there are differences between reality and social media personae, reality and art, reality and porn, it's important to be mindful of the distinctions between the content we consume and the people who create it.

    It's easy to get distracted by the pretty pictures, sensational stories, and lovely lifestyles portrayed in ABDL media, but it's important to remember that these are often highly curated and stylized representations of reality. By focusing too much on the media, it's easy to forget the realities of the ABDL community and the genuine connections that can be formed here.

    If you're here to live out a fantasy, admire models, or consume content, there are spaces for that. But there are also people who are here to forge real friendships, have real conversations, and live a real life here, finding out with others what that may look like. These individuals may be harder to find, as they are often lost in the deluge of content available.

    In order to foster a supportive and inclusive community, it's important to recognize and respect the boundaries of others, and to prioritize mutual respect and understanding. By doing so, we can create a community that celebrates the diversity of individuals and their interests, and that is built on genuine connections and friendships.

    In summary, while the art of the ABDL community is special, it's not as special as the people represented by that art. We should always strive to put people first and respect the boundaries and realities of the community, rather than getting caught up in the media and forgetting the people behind it.

    lolaandthensome

    My friend and baby Bro makes a good argument here that there is space and room to consume content as well as form genuine connections within this online community. I believe that all forms of content and communication are valid and create a richer community. But do not forget about intent when interacting! Everyone deserves respect and kindness, everyone deserves acceptance and civility. Don’t forget the people behind the profiles. We are all humans at the end of the day with real lives, real feelings, and real valid intentions.

    teddybear-withme

    What Being a Daddy Means to Me

    For years, I’ve been drawn to caregiver/little dynamics. I’m passionate about them and I think that type of relationship can be one of the most beautiful expressions of love. Seeing CG/l content between a couple is my absolute favorite. So, I wanted to share what being a caregiver (in my case, a Daddy to a little girl) means to me and why I find it so touching.

    I’d love to hear others’ thoughts too. What does it mean to you to be a caregiver in the ABDL scene? What about it speaks to your heart? What experiences have you had? I’d cherish the opportunity to learn from others and hear different perspectives!

    ---

    Origins of My Daddy Desires

    For nearly a year, my life has been in a state of transition after receiving some impossible news. Many of the supposed permanent anchors in my life ended up changing. Things fell apart in ways I never expected. But through the turmoil, I tried to find ways to make this experience constructive for myself: I’ve attended therapy, read self-help books, took a deep dive into attachment styles, built a support system of friends, quit an overbearing corporate job to start my own business, and gained self-resiliency by going out into the world on my own. I’ve learned more about myself, relationships, and the world in the last year than ever before.

    I solidly identify as a switch and a DL. I love wearing diapers and incorporating them into my daily life, and I’ve come to accept and treasure my little side as well. Both wearing diapers and being little nurture me in important ways and I love posting pictures about those sides of myself in the community. But despite that, my caregiving side is arguably the most integral part of me. It aligns the closest to who I am to others in my life, as well as to my personal life philosophy.

    I grew up in an unsafe and unstable environment, which instilled in me something important: the desire to make others feel safe. I feel that meaning in my life is created from making a positive impact on others by allowing them to feel heard, understood, loved, and appreciated. If my presence can make others’ lives even marginally easier or happier, then I will have lived a meaningful life. I make time for my friends, family, and partners when they need me, stopping to listen to make them feel valued. Not surprisingly, that manifests the same thing toward me in return. It’s a positive feedback loop. In short, caregiving brings meaning to my life, and my hope is that putting this positive energy into the world will far outlive me.

    I struggled for a while to make sense of my desires—my romantic/caregiving side felt completely disjointed from my DL-centric sexuality. I identified as a romantic asexual for years since my sexuality was so diaper and kink focused. Through that label, I sought connection in the asexual community and learned that I’m demisexual on the ace spectrum. So, sex and kink could be fun with someone else once a strong emotional connection exists. While that helped, it still didn’t really feel like the full picture. But then I discovered a role that immediately spoke to all parts of me: Daddy.

    My Ideal Daddy Relationship

    I find caregiving within a relationship to be incredibly heartwarming. To make my partner feel secure, happy, comfy, cherished, and understood is the stuff of fantasies—I have daydreams about it every day. It touches my heart deeply and makes my eyes tear up. I call that part of myself my Daddy Heart, and it latched onto the idea of this role right away.

    I’m particularly enamored by the idea of being a Daddy to an ABDL little girl. My primary love language is physical touch, so I’m constantly thinking about holding hands, cuddling, kissing, and putting my arms around my partner and whispering, “It’s okay—you’re safe here” into her ear. My mind doesn’t really focus on dark kinky play scenes or sex. Those can be fun, but the feeling of fulfillment I get from these romantic fantasies of nurturing and care are so much more powerful and innate.

    I envision so many sweet moments. I imagine channeling my deepest romantic desires, words of care, and encouragement into my little. I see myself being a reliable and dependable source of warmth and protection in her life. I would provide her a space to feel safe where she could feel as small and vulnerable as she needed to be. I’d offer mentorship and emotional support that would lower her anxiety. I would incorporate and consensually enforce wearing diapers and be responsible for changing her and keeping her comfy. I would be right there playing with her as she created imaginary worlds. There would be forehead kissies, bottle feeding, bedtime stories, baths, hair brushing, and intense mutual love for our family of stuffies. I would build her up through words of affirmation, like calling her a “good girl” and praising her for being brave. I’d make her life easier through acts of service, like opening a car door and buckling her seatbelt. Being in my arms would feel like home to her. And there’s so much more that runs through my head.

    All the while, I’d experience a flood of emotion and teary eyes since all those acts speak to that deep-rooted part of me. It harkens back to my life philosophy of caregiving for others being the key ingredient to a meaningful life. Providing care and security to my partner as their Daddy while showing affection, kindness, and empathy is exactly how I express love. But even better, it turns out that being a caregiver to a little girl, especially when diapers are involved, can be one of the most erotic things to me as well. I had finally found a bridge between my romantic and sexual desires that had felt so disjointed before, and it manifests as a charming and sexy expression of love, affection, and nurture.

    A Realistic Daddy Dynamic

    I’m fully aware of the potential pitfalls with these relationship styles, such as co-dependency and unhealthy attachment. I could write a whole post about that, and maybe will. But if done with ample communication between adult partners with a genuine life connection, I believe a caregiver/little dynamic can be grown and sustained. I envision a relationship of mutual love, care, patience, and respect, where both caregiver and little would be communicative and honest with each other about their needs and desires. And when needed, the little could flip around and provide care and support to Daddy.

    I hope to foster that type of relationship for myself. I want to one day be a model for others who have similar wishes to find their own fulfillment. I want to pour my love and attention into a special someone who desires receiving this brand of nurturing affection. I want to do it in a healthy and sustainable way. But ultimately, when I’m old, I want to look back and feel that my time here was meaningful because I provided friends, family, acquaintances—and especially my partner and little girl—with a life well loved.

    lolaandthensome

    What an incredible, insightful, comprehensive look into the beautiful dynamic of Dd/lg! I don’t think I’ve ever seen such a clear and heartfelt description of what it means to be a Daddy. My heart is just melted, TeddyBear. Any little girl would be so lucky to get the chance to bond with you this way. Any Littles out there?!

    So I took a little break from answering messages for 3 days and I now have 87 messages and 6 new Asks. Please be patient! I do really want to answer every person in kind. But, yikes…this girl is a bit overwhelmed at the moment! Sending love to each and every one of you. Thank you for the sunshine and sweetness in my inbox!

    littlemisfit

    I make post and share porn on the internet for you to reblog from me with confidence knowing that I consent to the enjoyment and sexualization of my body under these specific conditions: having my name credits and links to the specific work attached so people can support me + that is is only spread to/seen by adults who have their age in their bio. Consensual sharing of porn exists. Stop spreading unsourced porn and support the people who make it instead!

    lolaandthensome

    Preach. Honor those that share consensual porn. Support and lift up sex workers. Respect content creators and their art. Please, let’s all be mindful, honest, respectful adults.

    Let’s talk about messing.

    I thought I’d take a moment to answer the eleventy billion Asks I’ve received about messing. So…here goes. Yep, I do mess. Nope, I don’t particularly enjoy it. So then, why do I mess every day? Because it is a really important part of the dynamic within one of my relationships. I feel super proud of the fact that I’ve learned to do this thing I’ve resisted for so long and therefore had difficulty doing. I enjoy being a disgusting little slut who is freely giving up her control. I love the feeling of being obedient and affirming my submission. Messing, for me, is yet another layer in cultivating an intimate, exciting, and full dynamicand that I do love!

    More About Me and Why I Like Diapers

    I am a diaper convert. My Wasband (my ex, isn’t that a much nicer way to phrase it?!) is a lifelong DL, and he brought the whole world of abdl into my life shortly after we had started dating, 18 years ago. I've always been an open-minded person and pretty aware of my sexuality, but haven't had many chances to explore it fully. I began wearing diapers about 7 years ago as a way to more fully engage sexually with my husband at that time. His sexual desire and identity are closely intertwined with diapers. I saw myself exploring abdl as a way to have a more fulfilling and active sex life with him, so I passionately and lovingly asked that he allow me to see that side of him more and more. I have always been of a submissive mindset. I am into power exchange, humiliation, objectification, degradation, and as it turns out, I'm very into fluids as well. I absolutely adore being covered in and swallowing cum. AND I love being covered in and sitting in my own pee. (And the pee of select others winky face.) So diapers clicked for me pretty immediately in that aspect. This pee weirdo was born.

    I discovered the world of ddlg on the Tumblr of old and my Wasband and I started exploring that as a way to incorporate both of our kinks, diapers and power play. Turns out I'm not super into ageplay, but I was super into being forced into diapers. Diapers then became a gateway for me to start exploring my sexuality more fully...all aspects of it. As I started to allow myself the freedom to delve into kink and my sexuality I began to uncover myriad interests and desires, and I wanted to try most everything!! As I grew and became more confident in the sexual being I am, my Wasband became pretty uncomfortable with the person I was becoming. My blossoming sexuality was threatening to him. After years of exploring, compromising, communicating and working on things, we just grew too far apart in the things we wanted in life. So here I am, in the middle of a separation from the love of my entire adult life thus far, and beginning to explore polyamory, my bisexuality, and my more conscious, aware self while wearing all the diapers.