The Look

Based on a story idea from musclelover4826

It was unexpected when Adam messaged me.  I hadn’t heard from him in a few months.  We had been good friends for years, but then he moved a few suburbs over, got a new job that ate up all his time and gradually we had hung out less and less.  So it was welcome to see that he had messaged me.  

When I read the message though, it wasn’t had also probably been his best friend for the longest time. He must not have anyone else to turn to.  

That’s amazing mate!  I’m not sure I’m very good with kids, but if you really need the support, of course I’ll do what I can

It was the best I could do.  I mean, I didn’t want to say no, but I also didn’t want to be too enthusiastic.  

The bubble appeared showing he was typing a reply right away.  

Thanks dude!  I know kids have never been your thing, so this really would mean the world to me.  How about we meet at Harold’s tomorrow around noon, talk things over?  

Damn, he must really be that desperate.  Well I couldn’t refuse, what kind of friend would do that?  

Cool, see you then!  

**

Harold’s was a cafe Adam and I used to have lunch at pretty often.  But it had been nearly a year since I’d last been there.  I hoped it would be like old times, but I knew that was impossible now.  I had so many questions.  How did he end up adopting, how old was the kid, how did he manage the expenses?  

Adam looked pretty much the same as always when I spotted him sitting at a table toward the far side of the cafe.  He was thirty-two, thin with a receding hairline.  He used to wear glasses, but he’d had that laser surgery a few years back.  He wasn’t as well groomed or dressed as he could have been.  I took a lot of pride in my appearance, spent time getting my hair and outfit right each morning.  Adam often looked like he just threw on whatever was cleanest.  

Today he was in a t-shirt and track pants, his standard attire when he wasn’t at work.  I never said anything about it anymore. 

“Sam! Great to see you!” he greeted me, rising from the table to shake hands and then give a quick man-hug.  

“I’ve missed hanging out,” I told him.  “I thought you were just busy with work, so I didn’t try to push you.  I had no idea your life had got so complicated.  Sorry I didn’t stay in touch.”  

“No worries mate, I’m the one who should have been keeping you in the loop,” he told me.  “Anyway, the adoption was very sudden.”

“I guess it must have been.  You never talked about wanting a kid,” I said.  

“Well it was an unusual circumstance.  My little boy, he isn’t actually little, physically I mean.”  

I was confused and it showed on my face.  

“I mean he’s a little boy on the inside, up here,” he explained, tapping his temple.  “But on the outside, he’s big.”  

“So you adopted an intellectually impaired adult?” I asked.  

“Essentially yeah.”  

Now I really didn’t know what to think.  

“I didn’t even know that was possible.”  

“Well technically I’m his legal guardian, his power of attorney.  It’s an alternative to putting him into an institution, some heartless bureaucracy,” he explained.  

“How did this happen?” I asked, utterly baffled.  

“Mikey was a co-worker of mine.  He was a really smart guy, really friendly, but kind of kept to himself.  He didn’t have a partner, he was estranged from his family.  And then there was an incident, and he was left profoundly impaired.  With no family, he’d have been stuck in some institution and I couldn’t let that happen… so, I adopted him,” Adam explained.  

Oh Adam, poor bleeding heart Adam.  Of course he’d done it.  He’d never talked about kids, but he was the caring type.  

“That’s incredible Adam, I really have to take my hat off to you.”  

“It’s been wonderful, really.  He’s still big on the outside, but he’s really just a sweet, silly little boy now and I’ve found it so rewarding being his daddy.  That’s what he calls me you see.  It’s easier that way. We don’t ever mention his old family, who just abandoned him.

“But it is very draining to be daddy all the time, twenty-four seven.  And I was hoping to have a night a week off.  The problem is that no babysitter will watch a boy like mine.  So I was wondering if you’d do it for twenty dollars an hour, once a week?”  

Every week was way more than I had expected.  But I also hadn’t expected to be offered money to help my friend.  I was saving up to buy a house and every bit helped.  But watching a grown-up man who behaved like a child?  I wasn’t sure I could handle it either.  But again, I felt obligated to at least try.  

“I’d love to help, Adam,” I told him.  “When were you thinking?”  

Adam looked overjoyed.  

“Thanks so much Sam!” he gushed.  “Well, I was thinking Tuesday nights, so I could do pub quiz.”   

“Tuesdays would work for me,” I agreed.  

“Perfect! Now, you should probably meet Mikey,” Adam went on.  

“Sounds good.  You want me to meet him before Tuesday then?”  

Adam laughed. “No silly, I meant right now.”  

He gestured over my right shoulder and I looked over where he was gazing.  Harold’s had a small area for little kids to play while their parents ate.  It was just some basic toys, but it kept the little tots entertained.  

But right now it wasn’t a tiny tot playing there, it was a grown man.  Mikey appeared to be mid-twenties, average build, with messy light brown hair.  He was down on the floor on his hands and knees, playing with a toy tractor.  His t-shirt featured a cartoon raccoon and the words Daddy’s Little Rascal.  He had a pair of bright blue board shorts on as well, but he was barefoot and looking around I didn’t see any discarded pairs of shoes or sandals either in the play area or under our table.  

“Mikey! Come over here honey!” Adam called to him.  

I blushed at the attention being drawn to this grown man playing with little kid toys.  Other cafe customers looked of course.  Eyes widened as others noticed the oversized tyke.  Some looked disgusted, others filled with pity.  

Mikey shoved his toy tractor along the floor, running towards us hunched over as he pushed it along until it rammed into the empty chair next to mine.  

The barefooted man giggled and then looked up at us.  I could see the innocence in his eyes now, the slackness of his face.  Yes, it was obvious he wasn’t mentally all there.  

“Tac-taw go boom!” he announced.  

Adam wasn’t blushing at all.  He seemed impervious to the staring of other customers. 

“It sure did Mikey.  But right now I want you to say hello to Sam.”  

Mikey gaped at me slack-jawed for a moment, but said nothing.  

“Mikey, use your manners, say hello to Sam,” Adam directed him again.  

“Hi,” he chirped, before slipping two fingers in his mouth and nibbling at them.  

Adam shrugged. “I’m afraid that’s about the most you’re going to get now. He’s a bit shy.”  

“No problem,” I assured.  

Adam leant closer to Mikey, putting a hand on his arm.  “Honey, we’re going to go soon, so do you need to make tinkles now?” he asked.  

My eyes widened at the intrusive question.  But the grown man before me didn’t look scandalised.  He didn’t blush, didn’t tell Adam not to ask personal questions in public.  No he just shook his head, his expression neutral.  

“Are you sure?” Adam followed up.  

“No tinkle,” Mikey confirmed.  

“Is that because you tinkled already?” Adam asked next.  “Did you make a wee-wee in your pants?” 

I had to fight hard not to let my jaw drop.  But Mikey still wasn’t embarrassed by the question.  

“Nuh-uh,” he answered.  “Bih-boy!”  

“Okay, let’s just have a look then.”  

Have a look?  I couldn’t believe it, but Adam grabbed the front of Mikey’s shorts, pulled up his t-shirt and then yanked the elastic waist back, peering down into the man’s crotch.  After a long moment he pronounced, “Yep, all dry!”  

Mikey was oblivious to this public exposure.  He just grinned all the more as he was confirmed to be dry.  “Uh-huh! Mikey use da potty.  Mikey bih-boy!”  

“Yes, you’re a very big boy,” Adam agreed.  “Now, finish your milk before we go.”  

Adam held up what was unmistakably a sippy cup with two handles.  

But now Mikey balked, pouting and shaking his head.  

“Dun wanna.”  

“Mikey, you need to finish your milk.”  

“No!” he snapped, deeply pouting now, crossing his arms, looking ready to have a tantrum.  

“Mikey, no treat later if you don’t finish your milk.  Be a good boy for Daddy.” 

Mikey’s resolve instantly disappeared.  He clearly wanted his treat, or maybe just to be a good boy.  In any case he let Adam guide the sippy cup to his hands, holding it in both of them, drinking his milk.  He was messy, with milk dribbling down his chin the whole time. But he was doing his best.  

“There’s my thirsty boy.  Make it all gone for Daddy,” Adam cooed to him, rubbing his back. 

“And he used to be your colleague?” I asked, still amazed the man slurping down milk from a sippy cup could have once been a functional adult.  

Adam nodded.  “He was a very smart man actually, before he had an incident with D-R-U-G-S,” he explained, spelling the word out.  

Mikey’s face remained slack, his glassy eyes zoned out as he drank his milk.  He clearly couldn’t spell at all, probably didn’t even know the alphabet.    

“Oh, so that’s what happened,” I said, feeling so sad for Mikey.  

“Yeah, poor guy just burnt out his little brain.  But it’s okay now, he has daddy.  I do all the thinking, all the decision making for him and I keep him safe and happy.”  

Mikey smacked his lips, smacking the sippy cup down on the table and announcing, “All gone!”  

Adam lifted the cup to confirm this, then gave Mikey a big smile.  “You sure did. What a good boy you are for Daddy!  And I’m sure Sam is very proud of you too,” he added, looking to me.  

Mikey looked over at me too, his vacant eyes falling on my face.  

“Yes Mikey, you’re such a… um, big boy, finishing all your milk,” I praised him.  

It felt so strange to talk to this grown man like that.  It would have felt strange saying it even to a little kid, but it was ten times stranger to speak to a twenty-something man like that.  

Mikey ate it up though.  He smiled proudly and agreed, “Imma bih boy.”  

Then I did something that felt even more awkward for me.  I reached out and put my hand on Mikey’s back.  I normally loathed physical contact with strangers but it was different with kids.  Kids expected physical comfort from adults who cared for them. And I was going to be caring for Mikey.  I needed to get used to that idea now, and get him ready for it.  

“That’s right Mikey. And you’re a very lucky boy, you have such a nice daddy to look after you.”  

The grown toddler nodded seriously.  “Wub my daddy,” he affirmed, then turned to Adam and gave him a cuddle.  

“Aww, thanks buddy. Daddy loves you too,” Adam cooed to him, rubbing his back and giving him a little squeeze.  

After their cuddle Adam started gathering up their stuff.  “Okay, we have to be going. This little guy will be much less smiley if we miss story time at the library.”  

“Story-time? Isn’t that for… y’know, little kids?” I asked. 

“Yeah, but they are perfectly happy with special boys and girls like Mikey coming too.  There are a couple others who come now and then too.”  

As he got up I had to ask, “Did Mikey leave his shoes somewhere?”  

Adam chuckled.  “Oh no, he doesn’t have any to lose.  It’s bare feeties all the time for my little guy.”  

“Really? How come?”  

“Well it’s the healthiest thing for little boys.  Strengthens all the muscles there, toughens the soles.  Little boys are so clumsy and they’re always running and climbing.  It really helps having them barefoot, keeps them aware of their surroundings, makes them watch where they’re walking more, gives better grip when they climb.”  

It was a fair argument, but it overlooked the social aspect of it.  Mikey had such dirty feet now and he was being made to walk around barefoot in public. 

“All the time though?”  

“It started out as a quick way to toughen his feet up at the start.  But he got used to it so quickly, found it so enjoyable, and I realised that no one complained about his lack of shoes. When they saw he was special, that he was really just a little boy, no one expected any more of him than an actual toddler.  So why make him wear shoes when they clearly weren’t necessary and he didn’t want them?” Adam explained.  

“Yeah, I get that,” I told him.  No point forcing my views, that it looked slovenly and dirty, on them.  

“So I’ll see you Tuesday.  Say five o’clock?”  

“Perfect,” I agreed.  

And off they went, poor Mikey being led along by his hand, dirty soles of his bare feet smacking along the floor and then the pavement of the footpath.  Adam was definitely a caring father, but he had no taste at all.  

**

“Thanks so much for helping out,” Adam greeted me.  

“No worries,” I assured him, heading into the house.  

It had been a while since I’d last been in the place, but it had utterly transformed now.  There were toddler and preschooler toys just everywhere.  A toy box in the corner of the living room just overflowed with them.  There was Play Doh, Thomas the Tank Engine trains scattered about, Duplo Blocks and a bunch of toy dinosaurs among other toys.  

“Wow,” was all I could say.  

Adam laughed.  “Yeah, it’s pretty nuts. Little guy is basically in charge of this room.”  

Mikey came out of the kitchen then, a ratty looking stuffed raccoon cuddled against his face while he sort of chewed on the ear.  He was wearing a white t-shirt that showed all the food stains it had been subjected to, maybe just today.  He wasn’t wearing any pants either, just these rather thick looking undies with navy blue piping and designs of cars and trucks decorating them.  They were sized to fit Mikey, but clearly looked like they belonged on an actual little boy.  

Adam smiled and waved him over.  “C’mon Mikey, say hello to your babysitter.  You remember Sam.”  

Mikey nodded, but the raccoon ear didn’t leave his mouth.  

“Use your words, silly,” Adam prompted him.  

“Hi Sam,” Mikey greeted quietly, still looking me over warily.  

“He’s still a little bit shy with you, but that won’t last much longer and then you won’t be able to stop him chatting to you and demanding cuddles,” Adam warned.  

That still made me feel a little uneasy.  I wasn’t a big fan of physical contact and Adam knew that.  But I smiled nonetheless.  

“I’m sure you’ve noticed his lack of pants.  I’m afraid just getting him into his big boy undies and his shirt took all my efforts.  Mikey’s generally my big little nudist.  He almost never has clothes on when we’re home.”

I felt even more uncomfortable hearing that.  What if the man-boy tried to strip off again?  Would I be expected to stop him? 

“Is that… is it hard to stop him?” I asked awkwardly.  

“Oh… no, I don’t discourage it,” Adam clarified.  “I mean, if anything I’ve been very encouraging of his nudist streak.  It helps him get to the potty and he’s such a messy boy, it saves me a lot of laundry.  You can see what happens when he wears a shirt for lunch.”  

Get to the potty.  Did he mean the toilet, or did he mean… ah, yes, now I saw it, a plastic potty seat was right next to the toy box.  

“Does he use… um, that?” I asked, pointing to the potty seat.  

Adam nodded.  “Yes, he’s really only used to using his own potty.  The grown-up toilet scares him.  I find it’s best to simply get him seated on the potty while I read to him, let him be on it for ten minutes or so and then see if he’s used it.”  

“So the undies will have to come off for that,” I noted. 

“Oh, I doubt they’re going to stay on for long.  I got him dressed as best I could because I know how you are Sam.  And that’s okay, but if you’re going to do this, you’re going to have to get used to seeing Mikey in his birthday suit.  So don’t worry about keeping him in his clothes, it isn’t worth the fight.”  

He was right that it made me uncomfortable, but I wasn’t neurotic about it.  The man was basically a big toddler.  Toddlers were messy, they did all sorts of embarrassing and disgusting things and you just had to deal with it.  

“I’ll be fine,” I assured him.  

“Okay then.  His dinner's in the fridge, marked with his name. You just need to warm it up in the microwave.  He needs a bath before bed.  His normal bed-time book is next to the bed. He likes to be cuddled while you read it and he’ll want to help by turning the pages.  And don’t worry about jammies after his bath, the bed has a waterproof liner and he always sleeps in the buff.”  

He may like being cuddled while hearing his story, but that part wasn’t likely to happen tonight, at least not while he was also naked.  There was a limit to what I would accommodate.  

“Got it Adam,” I assured him.  “You go on out and I’ll take care of everything.”  

“Oh, bedtime is eight o’clock,” Adam added. “If he stays up any later he gets cranky.”  

Wow, that was an early bedtime.  Surely his body didn’t need as much sleep as a real little boy.  But it wasn’t my place to question Adam’s rules, so I just nodded.  

Adam gave Mikey a big cuddle before heading off, finally leaving me alone in charge of the man-toddler.  

“So, you want to show me some of your toys?” I asked him.  

While still looking a little shy, Mikey nodded and went over to his toy box.  

“Dis choo-choo twain,” he told me seriously, taking a toy I recognised as Henry and holding it up for me to look at.  

“Oh yes, that’s Henry, isn’t it?” I said, showing off my knowledge of children’s shows.  

Mikey grinned.  “Henwy,” he agreed.  “Henwy geen,” he chirped, looking positively proud at his ability to name the colour.  

“He sure is!” I praised the twenty-something for correctly identifying a colour.  “What a clever little boy you are.”  

His shyness was quickly disappearing in response to my praise.  Mikey crept over to me and handed me the toy.  

“You hab,” he said, then turned to play with one I recognised as Edward, making little chugging noises for it as he pushed it along the carpet.  

I kept the toy with me as I went to the kitchen to see what was left for dinner.  Mikey was engrossed in play now so it was fine.  Turned out to be simple chicken fingers and baby carrots with hummus to dip them in.  A note explained that everything should be kept separate, Mikey didn’t like his foods touching.  

I was about to warm them up when heavy footsteps approached.  Mikey was standing there with a serious expression, his knees twisted together, hand gripping the front of his undies.  

“Potty!” he announced.  

“It’s back in the playroom honey, you should hurry back to it,” I told him.  

He nodded and held out his free hand urgently.  Oh, he needed an adult to watch.  He actually couldn’t even use the toilet on his own.  

I took his hand, letting him lead us quickly back to the play area.  He turned around, facing me as we reached the potty, waiting for something.  Oh, he wanted my help.  Great, this was the last thing I wanted.  But it was better than cleaning up a mess.  I grabbed his undies and yanked them down, letting them drop to his ankles.  

With a smile he sat on his potty seat, looking ridiculous on the little plastic thing.  It was only seconds before the sound of urine on plastic could be heard and Mikey’s smile grew bigger.  

“Good job Mikey,” I praised him, giving his knee a little pat.  

“Tinkles in potty,” Mikey told me proudly.  

“They sure are.”  

When he was done he stood back up and I saw that his penis was still wet with the last few drops.  It was so strange to be seeing another man’s dick like this.  Not only that, he was all smooth down there.  Apparently Adam had shaved him, maybe to make cleaning up accidents easier.  I got a wet-wipe and awkwardly dabbed the end of his penis with it.  It was so weird, being so close to him, having him just stand there with that blank expression, no shame at all as another man cleaned his penis.  

“Okay, all clean,” I pronounced.  

“Aw cwean,” Mikey parrotted.  

I looked down at his undies, still piled at his feet.  Well there was nothing worse to see now anyway, so maybe I should let him be more comfortable, if he really did prefer that.  

“Mikey, did you want to leave your undies off?” I asked him.  

He nodded instantly.  

“You like being naked, huh?”  

He giggled. “Uh-huh! Imma nakey boy,” he agreed.  

“Okay, let’s get those undies off your feet then,” I agreed, helping him to step out of them.  

Mikey was clearly happy with this change, hopping up and down, his limp penis sort of jiggling up and down, visible beneath the bottom of his t-shirt.  

“Better?” I asked. 

“Yeff!” he agreed.  Then he said, “I wike Sam,” and opened his arms to me, asking for a cuddle.  

How could I refuse?  I let Mikey cuddle into my arms.  Oh, he was actually really nice to cuddle with.  He was warm and solid in my arms, he squeezed me, but not too tightly and he rested his head on my shoulder.  It was such a truly loving hug, no hesitation, no awkwardness from him at all.  

“You my fwiend?” he asked as we hugged.  

“Yeah, sure Mikey.  I’m your friend,” I agreed.  

He giggled lightly, then I felt something really unexpected. He pecked two kisses on my cheek.  

“Sam’s my fwiend,” he declared brightly.  

“Aww, thanks buddy,” I cooed to him.  I normally loath physical touch, but this, it was actually enjoyable, it felt good to be given such unguarded affection.  I mean I could feel this man’s penis, his bare penis, actually brushing against me, but instead of revulsion I just felt awe at how open he was.  

After our cuddle, which must have lasted a full minute, Mikey said, “Lez watch toons!”  

That was a perfect idea.  That would keep him engrossed for a long time, maybe all night.  

“Sure buddy!  What you want to watch?” I asked.  

Apparently he already knew, because he hurried to the shelf with all the DVDs and quickly picked one out.  

“Watch dis!” he urged.  

“What is it?” I asked, taking the DVD.  

“Kenny ‘n Owwie!” he announced so eagerly, like I would know what that was.  

The front cover showed two cartoon men that I certainly didn’t recognise from any show I’d heard of.  But they were always coming out with new kids’ shows these days, and I obviously didn’t keep up with them.  I knew the classics, like Thomas and friends, but this new stuff was a mystery.  

What was odd was that the men were the same size, both depicted as grown-ups as far as I could tell, but the one on the left was wearing a Tommy Pickles outfit of t-shirt and diaper and nothing else.  What kind of show was this?  Oh well, it would keep this giant rugrat entertained and that’s what mattered.  So I popped it in the DVD player.  

Mikey was bouncing on the couch now, legs folded under him.  

“Which episode?” I asked.  

“Watch ‘em all!” he demanded.  

“Ah, you’re a binge watcher.  I get that.  Okay then,” I agreed, sitting next to him on the couch and hitting play.  

The show seemed to be about two young men who were moving in together because their parents had got married.  Kenny, it explained, was a little boy, even though he looked big. Ah, no wonder Mikey loved this show so much, it was practically about him. 

The Ollie character on the other hand wasn’t so sure how he fit into his new family and Kenny wanted him to be little like him, to become his true brother.  The first episode established the general arc of the show.  Ollie wanting to fit into his new family, but struggling with how to be a little boy like Kenny.  He was resistant to the idea of course, insistent that he was a big boy, that he didn’t like little kid stuff.  But by the end of the episode Kenny had shown him how much fun it was to be little and Ollie agreed to let Kenny show him how to be a happy little boy.  

“Owwie bein’ siwwy!” Mikey pronounced as we waited for the next episode to load.  

I nodded.  “Yeah, he was insisting he was a big boy.  So silly,” I said sarcastically, but knowing it would go right over his head.  

The second episode loaded with it’s cheesy theme song playing, then the title card announcing this episode was called “Free Feet!”  

The episode opened with Kenny excited for a trip to the library.  

“Why are you so excited about going to a library? You can’t even read!” Ollie chided the overgrown toddler.  

“Don’t have to read silly! It’s story time, so the grown-up lady reads to us.  And she does all the voices and it’s so much fun.  But even better is after the library. That’s when we go to the playground next door!” Kenny explained.  

The conflict in this episode became clear as they were about to leave for the library, both characters still dressed as in the first episode.  That was standard for all cartoons, right?  But Kenny pointed to Ollie’s feet and shook his head.  

“Ollie, you gotta leave your shoes here,” Kenny insisted.  

“What! Why?  

“You still look all big and grown-up.  You’ll look silly at story-time sitting with the other little boys and girls.  And you can’t have shoes on the playground neither!”  

Ollie pouted, looking very much like a little boy.  “But then everyone will think I’m little, and my feet will get all dirty too!”  

But Kenny just nodded.  “Exactly!”  

“Huh?  

“Everyone will know you’re little.  And it’s going to feel so good Ollie.  And your feeties will get all dirty.  Little boys need to be messy.  It feels so good getting messy.  And it feels so, so good having free feeties.  You know you want to have free feeties. Nothing feels as good as that!” 

It was such a strange plot.  But the longer I watched, the funnier I felt.  When Ollie gave in and took off his shoes I felt good for him.  Lucky Ollie, now his free feet would feel so nice.  Yes, having free feet would be so comfy.  And that’s exactly what the character learnt in the episode.  By the end of it he was squishing his toes in the mud on the walk home after the playground.  Yes, he was a very lucky little boy.  

Mikey clapping and hopping up and down next to me shook me out of my thoughts.  Wow, I’d really got absorbed into the episode. I’d totally forgotten where I was, that I had this boy to be babysitting.  

“Lookit!” Mikey told me.  

I looked over to see him holding his foot, showing it to me.  

“I got fwee feeties!” he announced.  

I nodded.  Yes, Mikey was such a lucky boy, with his free bare feet.  God, that looked so comfy.  And his soles were all dirty too. Yes, that’s just how they were meant to look.  It must feel so nice.  

“They’re all dirty on the bottom,” I pointed out.  

Mikey nodded, still smiling.  “Feets get icky.  Daddy call ‘em widdle boy feets,” he told me.  

“Yeah, little boy feet sounds right,” I agreed.  

Normally I would find such an idea repulsive.  I mean dirt was bad.  It was bad to be all dirty, all covered in grime and germs.  Except for little boys.  Little boys needed to be all filthy.  That’s just how they were meant to be.  Right?  

I couldn’t ponder it longer as the next episode began and I just felt so drawn in the second the theme music began to play.  

**

I knelt on a towel at the side of the bathtub, sleeves rolled all the way up, though my shirt was a bit wet and sudsy anyway.  Mikey kept splashing the water.  A couple times he did it intentionally to wet me, smiling cheekily.  But mostly he was just oblivious to the mess he was making. He was utterly engrossed with his bath toys.  He had a scuba man, a couple bright plastic boats, and for some reason a Spiderman action figure too.  

He at least mostly cooperated as I scrubbed him clean.  He really was quite grimy.  It wasn’t just the soles of his feet, though they were by far the worst.  His hands were messy too, his knees grimy from crawling around the grass and dirt of the yard earlier in the day.  His hair had a couple twigs stuck in it from when he must have done somersaults outside as well.  

The bathroom was humid, steamy even, with that familiar smell of warm bathwater.  I had to admit this was actually quite enjoyable, caring for this big little boy.  He was so smiley, so happy and innocent.  

“Sam, you geddin!” Mikey urged at one point, patting his hands on the water’s surface again.  

“No silly, only little boys have baths,” I reminded him.  

He shrugged and returned to talking to his scuba man.  But a strange part of me did kind of want to climb into the water with him.  It was so nice and warm.  The tub was so big too. It would be quite a squeeze to be sure, but we’d probably both fit.  But that would be totally inappropriate of course.  

After his bath Mikey climbed out and let me scrub him dry as best I could with a nice soft, thirsty towel.  

“Okay, now it beddy-byes time,” I told him.  

How odd that it was beginning to feel natural speaking to this fully grown man in such a childish way.  

Mikey pouted.  

“Wanna stay up wid you!” he sulked.  

“I know, but Daddy says this is your normal bedtime and I want to be able to tell him you were a very good boy.”  

Mikey frowned stubbornly while I ran the towel over his arms and then his legs.  

“Are you going to be a good boy for me, Mikey?” 

The twenty-something man nodded at last.  

“Uh-huh.  But you gotta wead me a stowy,” he insisted. 

I chuckled lightly.  “Of course I will honey.”  

All dry, Mikey took my hand, eager to have his story at least.  So strange, watching him pad along the carpeted hallway with his body so bare, so utterly exposed.  I didn’t even suggest pyjamas, or putting his stained t-shirt back on.  Adam said this was his normal sleep attire, his birthday suit.  

Mikey climbed quickly into his bed, getting under his dinosaur themed sheets and grabbing the big picture book off his bed stand.  

“C’mon, we gotta cuddle,” he urged, patting the space on the bed next to him.  

And something strange happened then.  All my hang-ups about physical contact, my awkwardness around nudity, seemed to have simply melted away.  On the contrary, I felt a powerful urge to climb into the bed, snuggle Mikey up, have close, affectionate, physical contact with him.  

“Okay buddy!” I said, climbing into the warm bed, feeling that soft waterproof sheet under me.  

Mikey quickly rolled his body right into mine.  I snaked my arms under his shoulders, squeezed him in tighter, feeling his leg even intertwine with my own.  So much skin to skin contact.  He was warm and smelled so fresh from his bath.  His head, with its still damp hair, rested solidly on my shoulder and shoved the book into my hands.  

It was a silly little book about a bear hunt, complete with animations of course.  Simple short words, but even then they were too complex for little Mikey now.  

“Do you know what that says?” I asked him, running my finger across the first line.  We’re going on a bear hunt!

Mikey gazed at the words, his eyes so unfocused, his face slack and sleepy and uncomprehending.  He touched the line with his own finger, but said nothing.  After a moment he simply shook his head.  

“That’s okay, you’re much too little to read, aren’t you honey?”  

Mikey nodded seriously.  “Too widdle,” he agreed.  

So I read the story to him instead.  He helped by turning the pages of course.  

“I do it. Mikey hewp!” he chirped each time.  

“Good boy,” I replied each time as well.  

Mostly though, he snuggled tightly against me, sucking on his thumb, eyes half-closed as he prepared to drift off to sleep at eight in the evening.  

But the very strangest thing of all was the thoughts that kept popping unheeded into my head.  Wondering what it felt like for Mikey, not knowing how to read even the simplest of words.  What was it like to go from such an intelligent, independent adult to this?  

But most of all, I couldn’t stop thinking about how Mikey felt being all naked.  And what it would be like if I was naked too.  We’d watched three episodes of Ollie and Kenny and at the end of the third they’d been cuddling each other to sleep.  What would that be like? If I was like Mikey, if I was simple-minded too and we were sharing this bed, having the story read to the two of us, as brothers.  How would this cuddle feel if I was just as naked as Mikey, if our bare penises brushed against each other.  

It was a relief when Mikey’s eyes closed and he drifted off to sleep with the story not even finished.  I managed to extricate myself from the bed without waking him, going back to the living room to recover my composure.  I had to shut out these strange thoughts.  How could I be feeling almost… jealous, of Mikey?  He was trapped here with a toddler’s mind.  He was messy and totally lacking any privacy, or even a concept of privacy.  And yet, even as I thought about that, my penis got hard.  

**

For the rest of the week I kept having these thoughts about Mikey, about what he might be doing at the moment, about what it would be like to be him.  

When I got home from work on Wednesday I immediately kicked off my shoes, peeled off my socks.  God, that felt so much better, just an utter relief.  I needed to go to the supermarket though, buy my dinner.  But when I got to the front door I hesitated before grabbing my shoes.  It felt so good having free feeties.  I scrunched my toes on the carpet.  God, it was nice to have them out in the air, feeling the floor under my soles.  

I didn’t even own a pair of sandals or jandals though.  I’d never liked guys who wore them. But now… I didn’t want to put those shoes back on.  What if I just went to the store barefoot?  

Ugh, my penis stiffened instantly.  

But my feet would be all dirty if I did that.  

Oh God, my erection stiffened more.  

Everyone would see me though.  They’d see I was a barefoot guy, walking around the supermarket with no shoes like… like a little boy.  

I almost creamed my pants right there at the thought.  I was sweating heavily, I was so aroused.  This wasn’t normal of course.  But I didn’t want it to stop.  

I walked out the door, feeling that warm pavement under my soles.  I got in my car.  Jesus, I’d never driven barefoot in my life.  And then I was at the supermarket, the moment of truth.  I got out of the car, felt the hot pavement of the car park under my bare soles, then the smooth, cool linoleum floor of the store.  I had done it.  And god did it feel amazing!  

**

Tuesday afternoon meant it was time to babysit Mikey again.  I changed out of my work clothes, put on something more comfy.  I’d been dressing down after work all week.  Why bother being all formal when you didn’t have to be?  And besides, tonight I’d be dealing with a messy little boy.  It had been silly to dress in good clothes last week.  

I was feeling thrilled to see Mikey again.  I couldn’t stop picturing him after his bath last week, all pink and smooth and nakey, his doodle bouncing between his thighs as he walked to the bedroom.  

Then Adam messaged me: 

Hey mate, sorry I got stuck at work.  Could you pick Mikey up from his daycare and bring him home? 

Mikey went to a daycare during the day.  Huh, well that made sense.  He couldn’t very well stay home alone could he?  

I quickly replied that I’d be happy to pick him up and Adam sent me the details.  

The daycare turned out to be an adult care centre.  It was a place filled with special people, intellectually impaired adults.  The front door was tightly secured, like a jail or a psych ward.  But once the receptionist had buzzed me through I was led to a room that looked very much like a child’s daycare.  

The walls were brightly coloured, painted with trees and flowers and cartoon animals.  The special men and women played with toys, coloured with crudely held crayons, watched a children’s cartoon show.  

Mikey was sitting there on his bottom on the floor watching the show with four others.  I noticed right away that he seemed to be wearing nothing but his shorts.  He was shirtless as well as barefoot.  And actually both the other men on the floor with him were the same.  Actually no, one of them was wearing just these thick undies, perhaps pull-ups actually.  And even the thirty-something woman next to him was topless and even braless.  She was just wearing the frilliest pink skirt, her bare breasts on full display.  

None of them seemed to notice my arrival.  They were all totally absorbed with their show.  Mikey was gazing at it with wide, glassy eyes and the slackest jaw, his chin shiny with drool.  What on Earth was so captivating?  

Oh, it was Kenny and Ollie!  For a moment I felt almost compelled to sit right down next to Mikey on my butt, to watch the entrancing show with him.  

But the desire to get him home, be his babysitter, was stronger.  

“Mikey honey, it’s time to go home buddy,” I told him, kneeling down and patting his shoulder.  

Mikey looked over at me, blinking as though he were just waking from a nap.  After a long moment his eyes focused and he smiled at me.  

“Sam!” he chirped.  

“That’s right buddy.  You ready to go home?”  

“Uh-huh!”  

I got him stood up and said, “Let’s get your things. Do you have a cubby here?”  

“Yeth!” he assured, taking my hand to lead me this time.  

We found his bag in his cubby.  The cubby was labeled with his name, but also his photo.  No doubt so that he could recognise it.  His t-shirt was there as well.  There were shirts and bras in a number of the cubbies in fact.  

“Okay, we better get your shirt back on,” I prompted.  

Mikey nodded obediently and raised his hands in the air, waiting for me to dress him.  

“How come everyone has their shirts off?” I asked as I threaded his arms through the holes.  

“Cuz more comfy,” he answered.  

I was surprised the carers let them just run around half naked because it was more comfortable, but it probably also meant less mess for them.  No need for a change of clothes if you just take their clothes off on arrival.  

“There we go, all dressed!” I pronounced.  

Mikey grinned and patted his tummy, looking down.  His eyes widened and he grinned ear to ear, pointing at our feet.  

“Sam goz fwee feeties!” he declared.  

I felt embarrassed and excited at once, having him notice, having him point it out to everyone.  

“Yeah, I like being barefoot too.  It feels so nice,” I told him.  

“Dem icky feets?” he asked.  

I felt a little thrill as I stood on one foot and held up the other to show him the bare sole, to show him how black it was. I hadn’t worn shoes outside of work for a week now.  

Mikey beamed.  “Widdle boy feets!” he confirmed.  

“Yep, just like yours,” I told him, opening my arms as he instantly thrust his body into mine, demanding the biggest of cuddles.  Oh, it felt so good hugging him.  Our toes overlapped and I felt his wiggling atop mine.  

**

Back at Adam’s house again I got Mikey unbuckled from the back-seat, let him hurry inside.  He showed me more of his toys after that.  We played with his blocks, crashed his cars together.  Then I warmed up the dinner Adam had left for him.  But as I laid it out, I couldn’t help but say, “Mikey, I don’t want you to get your clothes messy while you’re eating.  Why don’t we take them off.  Would you like that buddy?”  

He nodded right away, creeping over on his hands and knees and sitting back on his bottom, arms raised straight in the air.  I slipped the t-shirt back off.  My heart pounded as I said, “Okay Mikey, go ahead and stand up for me, so we can… um, get everything off you.”  

Without a flicker of hesitation or blush, Mikey stood up, waiting innocently as I undid the button of his shorts, unzipped them and then slipped my thumbs into the waist of not just the shorts, but his cartoon-print undies as well.  I slipped them down at once, watching his penis flop clear.  As I knelt down at his feet to guide them out of the leg holes, I was at the perfect height to look right at his doodle, all smooth and soft, dangling between his hairless thighs.  

“There we go, all nakey!” I said, gathering up his piled clothes.  

“Nakey boy!” Mikey agreed brightly, reaching down without a hint of shame, grabbing his penis and absently poking and playing with it right in front of me.  “Lookit my doodle! All bounthy!” he declared, hopping up and down so his penis did indeed jiggle and flop about.  

And I just smiled and nodded and even reached out and softly patted his bare bottom.  I wanted to encourage this nudism. I wanted him to know it was a good thing to be a nakey boy.  

But most of all, I wanted to know what it felt like.  I mean, I knew what it felt like to be nude.  But what did it feel like to have no modesty about it, to be so utterly innocent about being naked in front of another man.  

Mikey ate his dinner with his fingers and I cleaned him up afterwards.  But then he wanted to watch more cartoons.  

“You were just watching Kenny and Ollie at daycare.  You really want to watch more?” I asked.  

But he nodded vigorously.  “Wanna watch wid Sam!” he insisted, pulling me to the living room, to snuggle up on the couch again.  

I didn’t want to argue with that.  Soon I had his bare body cuddled so warmly against me.  He was sprawled right across my lap, arm around my neck, head resting on my shoulder.  I rested my own hands on his legs, feeling that smooth skin.  

We picked up with the fourth episode of Kenny and Ollie, right where we left off.  And as comfy and excited as I felt with Mikey on my lap, as soon as the theme song started, I was aware of nothing but the TV screen.  It just made me feel so peaceful, so utterly safe and secure.  There was no need to worry about anything else.  Just watch the toons, watch Kenny and Ollie and learn from them.  Kenny had such important lessons for us.  And we were all such good boys, such fast learners.  

**

We watched four episodes, but then it was bath time.  I drew it, got the toys in the water, then waited as Mikey climbed in.  I knelt there at the side, wishing I got to be so splashy and have cool toys.  Mikey splashed me really big at one point and I couldn’t help but giggle.  

“Gotchew all wet!” he shouted, grinning ear to ear.  

“You sure did,” I agreed.  I decided to take off my shirt, since it was all wet.  Oh, it felt nice having my shirt off.  No wonder Mikey went around like this all day at daycare.  He was so lucky.  I had to wear a shirt all day.  I even had to wear shoes for work. Mikey didn’t even own any shoes.  

After the bath I towelled Mikey dry again.  

“Lez pway,” he urged me.  

“Beddy-bye time,” I reminded him.  

He shook his head.  “Pway together,” he urged.  

It reminded me of the episode of Kenny and Ollie where the boys were left home alone, so they stayed up way past their bed-times and played lots of fun games.  It was naughty, but little boys were meant to be naughty.  Little boys broke the rules sometimes, because it was fun.  

I really did want to play with Mikey.  And I wanted to be naughty.  I wanted to break the rules.  That was silly.  That felt good.  

“Okay, let’s play a little bit,” I agreed.  

“Yay! Pway time!” Mikey shouted, hurrying back to the living room, to the toys.  

I joined him there, on the floor, on our hands and knees.  It was fun playing with him and he had such good toys too.  

As we played with the cars, driving him on this special rug laid out like city streets, Mikey put his hand on my back, getting my attention.  

“You my beft fwiend,” he told me, looking utterly serious.  

And the level of affection I felt for him just absolutely surged.  I was being completely honest when I nodded and assured him, “You’re my best friend too!”  

He smiled and we shared another cuddle, right there on the floor.  It felt nice with so much skin to skin contact.  

Then Mikey poked at my shorts and said, “You be nakey.”  

I shook my head.  “No Mikey, I can’t get naked.”  

“Feews good,” he insisted.  “Bounthy pee-pee,” he urged, bouncing on his knees to make his penis jiggle again.  

“I know. I’m glad you like being nakey.  But only little boys can run around being naked jaybirds.  I’m a big boy.  I mean… I’m all grown up,” I corrected.  

Mikey pouted and poked my foot.  “Widdle boy feets,” he said.  

I chuckled.  “Yeah, I do have little boy feet, like you.  But the rest of me is big.”  

“Be widdle. Wike Owwie!” he urged.  

I understood now.  The last episode we watched, Ollie learned how fun it was to be naked after a bath.  Mikey clearly thought I was like Ollie, that I was trying to become his brother.  And inside, in my own head, I couldn’t help but feel the same thing.  It was so strange, but yeah, I felt like a big part of me did want to be his brother.  I did want to be like Ollie.  And it would be amazing to be naked now, like Mikey.  

But this wasn’t a cartoon.  I was a grown-up, I was the babysitter, not the brother.  

“Sorry Mikey, but I have to stay big so I can take care of you,” I explained.  

Mikey pouted, but he seemed to understand that.  We played a bit longer, but then he started to yawn and I knew he needed to actually get to sleep.  

Soon we were back in his bed.  It felt so nice under those covers, with Mikey cuddled next to me.  I started reading the book to him.  He didn’t care that it was the same story as last time.  It must be the same one a lot.  He liked the repetition.  Little kids are like that.  

What changed this time is how sleepy I felt.  But then something happened to make me regain some alertness.  Mikey began to hump his penis against my thigh as I read the story.  At first I thought I was imagining it. Then I thought it was incidental.  But Mikey continued, and he began to hump harder.  

I stopped reading, looking down at Mikey.  He was staring right up at me, his eyes wide, arms tight around me as he pushed his penis up and down against my shorts.  

“Mikey, what are you doing buddy?” I asked.  

“My doodle happy.  Gez happy when Daddy weads me.  Sam make it happy too.”  

I knew this should be revolting to me.  I should be stopping this, getting out of bed, telling Mikey this was inappropriate.  

But Mikey didn’t know any better.  He just felt happy, he felt good, because of me.  I peaked under the covers.  Oh yes, he had a pulsing erection.  He was stiff as a board, grinding against me.  I’d made him that excited.  My gentleness with him, my cuddles.  And that just made me feel so, so good.  I wanted to make Mikey happy like that.  And it was so exciting to see his total lack of inhibitions again.  

“Do you… um, rub your doodle against Daddy like this?” I asked.  

Mikey breathed faster, pushing with more effort.  “Uh-huh.  Daddy tickle my doodle when it happy.”  

“And you like that?”  

He nodded right away.  “Doodle make stickies for Daddy. Stickies is nithe.”  

God, I so wanted to share some “stickies” with him.  But I couldn’t.  That would be wrong.  Was it wrong that Adam touched him down there? Was it wrong for Adam to help him get that release?  I didn’t know, but it would definitely be wrong for me.  I wasn’t even his Daddy.  

But I didn’t want to stop him either.  I couldn’t ruin his fun.  And it didn’t take much longer anyway.  I just let the book go, put my arms around his body and held him close, patting his back as he thrust and thrust and then grunted loudly, releasing streaks of sticky goo across my body and his own.  

I had streaks of Mikey’s warm cum across my tummy and chest.  It should have disgusted me.  But all I felt was happy for him, and jealous.  What an incredible release.  What freedom to have that pleasure without any concern for what it meant, for who was watching.  

Mikey kissed me on the cheek again, a big wet smooch.  This time, I kissed him back, planting one right on his lips.  

He giggled and then yawned again, going limp in my arms, drifting rapidly off to sleep.  And this time I just stayed where I was.  I was so sleepy now too.  And this was so comfy.  In no time at all, I was sleeping too.  

**

“Good morning buddy.”  

It was Adam’s gentle voice that woke me up.  The light in the window told me that it was indeed morning already.  I’d slept the whole night in Mikey’s bed.  Shit.  

I blushed deep red.  This looked awful, me in bed with this intellectually impaired man, who was naked, who’s cum was now surely dried all over my stomach.  

“Adam… I, oh, I must’ve drifted off while I was reading…” I stammered.  

Adam didn’t look upset though, he just looked concerned.  

“Don’t worry about it Sam,” he assured me.  “Are you decent under there?” he asked.  

“Decent?” I repeated, confused.  

He nodded. “You have some undies on? Or, are you nakey?”  

I quickly shook my head. “No, no, I’ve got my shorts on.  I just… I took off my shirt cuz we was taking a bath.  I mean… I was giving Mikey his bath.”  

Adam nodded, but then he pointed at the end of the bed, where my feet were poking out from the end of the covers.  

“I just noticed that you have little boy feeties down there.  Icky feets like those only come from being barefooted a lot.”  

I blushed again and shrugged.  “Oh, yeah… I have been recently.”  

“I didn’t see any shoes by the door when I got home.  Did you come barefoot today?”  

“Yeah, I didn’t think I’d need shoes for tonight and we would be playing ‘nd stuff so…”

“It’s fine, it’s fine buddy.  You don’t have to explain it to me.  I know how comfy bare feet are for boys.  And that’s what you are, right Sam?”  

I hesitated.  The way he asked that was confusing.  “Um… yeah,” I agreed.  

Adam nodded.  “That’s what I thought.”  

“Huh?”  

“I checked the DVD player when I saw you were in this bed last night.  I saw you’ve been watching Kenny and Ollie.  You watched it with Mikey, didn’t you?”  

“Oh… yeah, why?” I asked, really confused now.  It sounded like that was naughty.  My penis stiffened a bit at the thought of being naughty.  Little boys were naughty.  

“How many episodes did you watch? Can you remember?” he asked.  

“Um.  Maybe eight?  I dunno.  Mikey really likes it.”  

“It makes all little boys happy.  Very happy.  Mikey probably had a nice release last night, didn’t he?”  

Oh God, he knew.  I squirmed uncomfortably.  “Oh… he did… um, yeah, he sort of touched himself and I didn’t know if I should stop him…” 

Adam chuckled.  Thank goodness he didn’t seem upset.  Instead he sort of rubbed my shoulder to relax me.  

“It’s fine Sam, Mikey likes to make his stickies on a daily basis.  He’s still got a man’s sex drive and needs after all.  I help him most nights. It’s very bonding.  I love making him happy.”  

“Oh… okay,” I said, relieved that I wasn’t in trouble, even though it was good to be a little naughty.  

“I had just thought you might have had a release of your own,” Adam began.  

I violently shook my head.  “No! I would never do that Adam,” I assured him.  

Again he patted my arm in a calming way.  “Shh, shh, it’s okay Sam.  I wouldn’t be upset with you for getting some release.  It’s quite natural after watching so much Kenny and Ollie.  But I knew you hadn’t made your stickies yet.”  

“Yet?” I asked, feeling so utterly befuddled now.  

Adam nodded, frowning slightly now.  

“I’m sorry buddy.  I didn’t know that Mikey had any idea where those DVDs were kept.  You really weren’t supposed to see those shows.”  

“It’s just some cartoon,” I said.  

“No honey, it really isn’t.  You see Mikey didn’t really have a drug overdose at all.  What made his head all empty was watching Kenny and Ollie.  The show is hypnotic, inducing a deep trance and then planting suggestions.  

“It’s made to be a very pleasurable experience, so you’d want to keep watching, over and over.  Needing to masturbate afterwards is very normal.  The first time Mikey watched them, he couldn’t keep his hands off himself.  You’ve shown incredible control not to touch yourself, impressive really.”  

My heart was pounding in my chest.  I’d been exposed to hypnosis.  Jesus, that explained so much.  All these strange thoughts and desires had been put into my head.  God, it was a relief to know I wasn’t just a pervert.  

“Wow, Adam, that makes me feel a lot better actually.  I’ve been having all these strange urges.  And oh wow, that’s gotta be why I’ve been going around barefoot so much!”  

“Oh definitely.  I wanted Mikey to be my perpetually barefooted boy, so that’s a major part of the suggestions,” Adam confirmed.  

As messed up as all that was, all I cared about now was I was off the hook.  

“Well, guess I won’t be watching any more of that show,” I joked.  

Adam didn’t laugh though.  He was frowning again.  

“What’s wrong?” I asked.  

“The programming doesn’t work all at once.  It can change some behaviours, make you feel funny, but most of what’s placed inside your head doesn’t come out until it’s triggered.”  

I had the sudden feeling of a ticking time bomb inside me.  My anxiety was back in a flash.  

“What trigger?!” I demanded.  

My gasp was loud enough that it woke Mikey up.  He stirred in the bed beside me, stretching out, smiling sleepily up at his Daddy.  

“Wakie-wakie buddy,” Adam cooed.  

“Daddy!” Mikey chirped, throwing off his covers and bounding over to cuddle his Daddy.  

Knowing that Mikey had actually been made like this by Adam made me see this in a whole new light.  Had Mikey wanted this?  Had he had any say at all?  What was I a part of?  

Adam cuddled and kissed Mikey, even reaching right down and gently flicking his soft penis.  

“Did you make some nice big gooey squirts for Sam last night?”  

Mikey chortled innocently.  “Yeth Daddy! Made ‘em on Sam.  He dun do ‘em Daddy.  Sam no stickies.”  

“I know baby.  Next time you’ll just have to help him, won’t you?” Adam cooed to him.  

Mikey nodded. “Mikey gonna hewp,” he agreed.  

“Such a good boy. Okay, you go play while I talk with Sam, okay honey.”  

Mikey didn’t need telling twice.  He raced out of the room, already full of energy.  

“What was that about?  He can’t be… y’know, touching me down there,” I gasped.  

Adam sat back on the side of the bed.  

“Sam, the trigger is different for each person.  I got to decide how I wanted Mikey’s programming triggered.” He paused a moment, then with a shrug said, “I chose ejaculation.”

My jaw dropped open.  “What?”  

Adam blushed a little.  

“Yeah, I know it sounds messed up.  But here’s the thing.  I wanted it to feel wonderful.  I wanted it to be a pleasurable experience.  Having an orgasm at the same time as all his smarts were wiped from his head, every last mature and intelligent thought blanked from his mind, at the same time as he achieved a glorious, orgasmic release.  So that’s what I chose for him.”  

“What you chose for him?  Did he know what was going to happen?” I asked, unable to keep the accusatory tone out anymore.  

“Mikey was deeply unhappy.  He wanted out of the life he had one way or another.  I just helped him achieve the least violent exit from all his worries.  Did he know that he’d be like he is now? No.  But I promised him a permanent release from his problems and I delivered that.”  

“Permanent?” I echoed, more nervous again.  

Adam nodded.  “The programming is a one way trip.  Mikey won’t be growing back up, going back to his job.  He’s got the mind of a three year old and always will.”  

“But… you said… I mean, I watched those shows…”  

Adam nodded seriously.  

“When I came home last night and saw you in bed with him, I was a little confused.  But then I saw the soles of your feet.  I saw how black they are.  And I know how you are, so neat, so well dressed and never liking physical contact.  So seeing you cuddled in bed with him, dirty feet, I pretty much already knew.  

“Still, I checked the DVD player to confirm it.  And then I knew there was no question that you’d seen the programming.  I decided to let you sleep, give you some time to let it all be done.  I thought by the time I came this morning it would be finished.  

“Frankly I fully expected to be greeted with a big drooly smile when I woke you up.  I expected to pull back those sheets and find two bare bodies under them, two big messy streaks of drying cum on the sheets over both your bare doodles.”

The very suggestion chilled me to the bone.  

“But I didn’t have my release,” I told him.  “Like you said, I held back.”  

He nodded.  “Yes, you did.”  

“So now what?” I asked.  

“Now?  Well, I’ll get you breakfast shortly.  And then we’ll get the both of you dressed for daycare.  I’ve already called them.  I’ve explained what happened.  They’re part of this of course, they produce DVDs.  They’ve already got a cubby for you, right next to Mikey’s.”  

What the fuck?!  I shook my head vigorously.  

“What are you talking about Adam?  Like you said, I didn’t give in, I’ve still got my mind.  I’m going to work, not to daycare!”  

Adam just gave me that sad, pitying look again.  

“Oh Sam, you just haven’t had it triggered yet.  It’s just sitting there, waiting.  The next time you ejaculate, that’ll be it.  You’ll instantly experience an irreversible loss of your intelligence and maturity.  Even if you held out for a week or more, eventually it would happen in your sleep.  

“Then you’d just wake up that way, a toddler in a grown-up body, all alone and probably terrified.  You wouldn’t want that.  Not to mention that you’d miss out on the best part.  Honey I saw Mikey’s trigger ejaculation.  It was better than a normal orgasm.  It was pure euphoria, I saw it in his eyes.  

“And now… well, I have to admit I’m glad you hadn’t already had your release when I woke you just now.  I’m glad that I’m going to get to see it, see that blissed out look of euphoria.  It’s just, the look on Mikey’s face, the way his eyes went all peaceful and innocent when it happened, I just loved seeing that look, seeing that change.  And now I’m going to get to see it again on your face.”  

I shook my head.  “Mikey didn’t know what was going to happen though, did he?”  

“No,” Adam agreed. 

“Well I do now.  And I’m not just going to let that happen!”  

“There’s no reason to put it off Sam.  It’s irreversible now and inevitable.  It’s best to just let it be done with.  Just reach down under those sheets, make that second stain right now.  Then we can get those shorts and undies off, let you enjoy some nakey time before daycare.  That’s part of the programming too, making you my lovely little nudist.”  

I didn’t want Adam or anyone else seeing me naked.  But at the same time, the very thought of it did make me horny.  I couldn’t help it and the little tent in the sheets didn’t escape Adam’s attention.  

“That’s right Sam, you’re going to be my jaybird.  Isn’t that silly, after how modest and well dressed you’ve been.  I made the programme for Mikey and he was never really that uptight.  But there’s no question it will work for you too.  You’ll be just as big an exhibitionist as Mikey.  

“I love answering the door for deliveries with him right there behind me, let them all get a little show, tell them I’m sorry, that my boy is special, that he’s disabled.  Tell them how I just can’t keep clothes on him.  

“And soon you’ll be right there next to him, waving to the courier driver, your pee-pee bouncing around for him to see.”  

He knew what he was doing.  He wasn’t mocking me, torturing me for pleasure.  No, he knew those thoughts were arousing me now, driven by his programming.  He was trying to push me over the edge, make me cream my undies right now.  And damn it, those horrifying thoughts did make me so horny.  

“Why are you doing this?!” I demanded.  

Adam patted my shoulder again. “The daycare is all set to do your intake in just a couple hours.  I need today to get everything ready to transition you to your new life.  I’ve already scheduled a doctor’s appointment, to have you diagnosed as profoundly intellectually impaired, start the ball rolling to be appointed your guardian.  

“It’s a lot of work for me.  But you won’t need to worry about any of that if you just make your creamies for me now.  You’ll just have a nice fun day playing with Mikey, making new friends at daycare.  No more responsibilities for you at all.”

“They all saw me yesterday, they know I’m normal,” I pointed out.  

Adam shrugged.  “Yes, and they’re all quite happy to help you adjust to your new life.  I don’t think you’ll be getting too much special treatment though.  They have a whole facility of special boys and girls and by the time you arrive, you’ll be just another disabled boy.  They’ll help you put your clothes in your cubby so you’re comfy for play.  They’ll keep you busy while us grown-ups work.”  

No more work.  No more apartment, never mind saving for a home of my own.  Adam was telling me my life was going to be just like Mikey’s now.  Jesus, playing on my hands and knees in the kiddy play area at Harold’s.  Crawling around between the tables with my bare feet up for everyone to see.  Everyone I knew would see me reduced to this empty-eyed moron with dirty bare feet, messy hair and stained clothes.  

“What are my friends, my co-workers going to think happened?” I gasped.  

“Carbon monoxide poisoning, causing serious brain damage.  They’ll all be very sympathetic.  Maybe some will help babysit you and Mikey from time to time.  You won’t just disappear, some of them, the real friends, will still be in your life.  

“Here look at this,” he said, taking out his phone, scrolling to something.  

“What?” 

“It’s a private Facebook group we have, for us caregivers.  Look at this album.”  

He showed me a photo of an unhappy looking man of about forty in a suit, posing with a number of other people in an office. He was a bit overweight, badly balding with hair going grey at the temples.  He looked pretty boring and ordinary really.  

“My friend Mary’s husband.  He was an insurance agent.  This was his office.  After he had his programming, she still brought him back for visits.”  

The next photo showed the same man in the same office.  All the same co-workers were gathered around him.  But now Mary’s husband was sitting on the floor on his bottom.  His suit was gone.  He wore a t-shirt and pair of grey sweatpants.  But he was also barefoot, and the blackened soles of his feet were on full display to the camera.  His head had been shaved and a drool bib was around his neck, protecting his t-shirt.  But he also now had a huge, gaping grin on his face.  He looked utterly delighted to be sitting there with his former co-workers literally looking down on him.  

He flicked the screen and the next photo was so much worse.  The same man was there, but now he was squatting buck naked next to a bright red plastic potty seat.  It was impossible to miss his shaved, smooth penis hanging between his legs as he gaped slack-jawed into the potty seat, apparently trying to see what was inside.  And above him, smiling down at him, was a woman from the office photo, some co-worker now seeing him nude and apparently being potty-trained.  

“Jesus!” I grunted.  

“That’s his former personal assistant, Lisa.  She babysits him whenever she can, takes excellent care of him.  So you see your life will change, but it isn’t over completely.”  

There were other photos.  A handsome young doctor in his scrubs.  Flick the screen and he’s sitting in a doctor’s office on a bench, but now he’s completely nude and has his foot tightly in his hands, pulled awkwardly up to his face, his big toe firmly between his lips, sucking away at it with crossed eyes.  The caption read:

Billy waiting for the doctor to arrive for his incompetence exam.  Needless to say it was a quick session lol! Little guy showed the doctor how much he loves his toes these days. 

Then I noticed something interesting.  It was an album with hundreds of photos, and recently updated.  And it was called “The Look.”  

It was just what I feared.  Photos of men and women at the moment of their triggering, or just after.  The captions told the story.  For many the chosen trigger was a word or phrase.  For others a physical action.  

Ejaculation wasn’t something unique Adam had come up with though.  On the first page I saw four examples of it.  Four men who were sitting completely nude with glistening gooey streaks down their front sides.  Their penises were all still erect.  Two of them were squatting on a floor.  The other two sat on their butts, legs splayed wide apart.    One had a splash of cum dangling from his chin.  They were obviously all huge releases.  

And all four had what they called “the look.”  They were totally slack-jawed, their eyes wide and empty, pupil dilated, drool running down their chins.  

And each was followed by the “after” photo, apparently all taken a minute or two after the trigger.  Their penises were all soft in the after photos, but the cum was still visible, still shiny.  Two of the men were in mid hop, jumping up and down, arms flailing out, penises visibly flopping.  Both had utterly ecstatic expressions.  Gaping, open-mouthed grins, relaxed facial features, innocent eyes.  The third man was still on the floor, but now his toes were in his mouth and he seemed utterly entranced by them. 

The fourth was suddenly outside, in a driveway, still naked though, in full view of a street.  He was flapping his hand at a cherry red sports car, an ear to ear grin on his face.  

Saying bye-byes to his old car. What a happy boy!  

“Your photos will be on there soon sweetie,” Adam told me.  “Everyone will see your happy face.”  

I shoved the phone under the blankets, into my shorts pocket.  This was all the proof I needed.  

“No way!” I snapped, throwing off the covers and getting up.  “You’re nuts if you think I’m just going to let that happen.  I’m horny, yeah, but I’m not a teenager, I can hold it in.  And I’m going to a doctor, a professional hypnotist, whoever I can find and get this programming undone.”

Adam stepped back towards the door, but he didn’t look as nervous as I would have liked.  

“You don’t want to do this,” he told me.  

“Get out of my way Adam, or I’ll have to make you move” I threatened. 

He stepped aside, but said, “I wanted it to be your decision and I was hoping to have it done here, in your room.  This will be your bed too, shared with your brother.” 

“He’s not going to be my brother.”  

Adam frowned.  “I’m sorry Sam, but he is.  It’s squirt-squirt time Mikey.”  

I blinked, feeling odd, feeling floaty.  

“Sorry, it was designed for Mikey specifically.  I never intended this to happen to you.  I really didn’t.  But I also can’t leave you on your own with the programming waiting to be triggered, and I can’t let you leave and go blabbing about it now that you know.”  

My penis grew larger and stiffer than I thought possible.  The arousal that washed over me was beyond anything I could recall.  Holy shit, my shorts were tented right out.  I couldn’t help but grunt.  I actually moaned out loud.  

“Ohhh, fuck me.”  

Adam patted my shoulder again.  

“I promise I wasn’t lying.  It’s going to feel so good Sam.  Frankly I’m a bit jealous of you.  Seeing all those photos on Facebook, I can’t deny long being curious about how it actually feels.  I know it must be wonderful, but you’re going to actually experience it.  

“And afterwards, I promise, I’ll take great care of you.  And Mikey will be a great brother, I’m sure.”  

The pressure was building so fast in my balls.  It was like instant blue-balls and only getting worse.  Fuck, I felt like they might just explode if I didn’t empty them.  I could feel the pain spreading up into my pelvis, into my lower abdomen.  It was like I’d been edging for 12 straight hours and hadn’t jacked off in two weeks before that.  

If the programme could cause these physical sensations, I could no longer have any doubt it had worked on me, that it was real, that it could affect my mind.  

“Shit, shit, shit!” I gasped, pushing Adam hard, getting to the door and leaving the room.  

I had to get out of here, I had to tell someone.  I could barely think, the need was so strong, the need for that release.  Pain and pleasure still building with every single step.  My penis was tingling too.  I needed to let the cum out.  But I had to tell someone, let them know it wasn’t some accident.  Make sure they knew it was done to me, that I’m not just some intellectually disabled man.  

I reached the living room and froze.  Mikey was there, sitting bare bottomed on the carpet, legs splayed apart.  But there was a woman, who must have been Mary, Adam’s friend, sitting on the couch, smiling at me.  It had to be Mary, even though I’d never seen her.  Because her husband was squatting on the floor across from Mikey, plucking at his toes.  He was just as naked too, mooning his wife.  

“Ah, you must be Sam,” she greeted me.  “Adam called us over for a little playdate, help you with the transition.  But he did warn me you might not be quite ready to play.  But that’s okay, I can see you’re almost there.  Almost ready to join the others.  There’s just one thing that I think you need to see.”

I shook my head, but I couldn’t move another step.  My balls hurt too much.  And she was walking towards me, phone in her hand.  

“My Danny was like you.  Very formal, very uptight.  But then he saw that lovely show.  And look how happy it made him,” she cooed.  

She held up the phone, showing me the photo of Danny sitting on a bed, nude with his legs splayed, cum all over his big round tummy, toes curled, head thrown back and yes, he had the look, the slack-jawed, glazed eyed expression.  

And seeing it made me even hornier.  It was just too much.  I had to make the pain and urge go away.  I jammed my hand down my shorts, closed my fingers around the warm, hard rod that was my penis.  And I stroked vigorously.  

“There we go, that’s a good boy,” she cooed, running her fingers over my cheek.  

It took all of five seconds.  I let loose with a spurt so hard it felt like it would splatter the ceiling.  

“Ugh! Ohhhh! Mmmmm!”  

Jerk after jerk, spasm after spasm, it was incredible, it was the greatest feeling ever.  It was a hundred times more intense than a normal orgasm.  I was emptying my balls, I was emptying my head, emptying my very being.  

“Let’s get these out of the way,” Mary said, and I felt her yank my shorts and undies down, felt them drop to my ankles.  

Danny and Mikey were both looking, watching me keep stroking, watching the ropes of cum lash through the air, splatter across the carpet, across my feet, my tummy, my chest.  

“Good job Sammy, let it all out for Daddy.”  

Adam was there too now, patting my back, looking down at my erupting penis.  

Mary was getting her phone ready.  Oh God, she was going to take the photo for Facebook.  I was going to be seen like this by the whole group!  It was so shameful.  I began to blush, began to shiver.  

And then came a sensation I’d never experienced.  It wasn’t sexual, but it was a release.  It was sudden, it was intense.  And it took away the shame, the blush, the worry. What a relief.  And then, it took away the understanding.  So merciful, such a blessing.  In that instant, I lost my comprehension of what was happening, of what I was losing.  And that felt so, so good.  That was true, total peace.  

The lady took a photo of me then.  She smiled and the light on the phone flashed.  

“It really is beautiful,” Daddy told her, looking at me.  

“It truly is,” she agreed.  

More nice tingles from my doodle, more squirts.  And then it’s over.  I’m all messy, all gooey.  My doodle is tired.  It goes nighty-nights.  

“There we go, let’s get you cleaned up so you can play.  Doesn’t that sound nice?” Daddy says.  

Play does sound nice.  I like to play.  

“Yeff Daddy,” I agree.  

Daddy does clean me up.  He uses the nice wet cloths and then all the gooeys are gone.  

“Let’s get rid of these too,” he says, helping me lift my feet out of the shorts and undies on the floor.  “My little jaybird boy is much more comfy nakey, aren’t you Sammy?”  

I’ve never been so certain of something.  I love being nakey.  Yes, it feels so wonderful being all free, having the air on my skin. And the best thing of all is how my doodle bounces around when I move.  

Mikey points to me and smiles.  “Sammy gotta bounthy doodle!” he announced.  

“Bounthy doodle!” I repeated in agreement.  Yes, everyone thought it was funny.  

I wish I got to have a bouncy doodle all the time, but I had to put on clothes for going to daycare.  I have to go to daycare because little boys can’t be home all alone and Daddy and the other lady need to work.  Grown-ups go to work.  Little boys go to play at daycare.  I’m sure work is boring and bad.  I don’t know how I know that, but I just do.  

**

I used to be big.  I forgot that for a little while.  But then I remembered.  I was big like Daddy.  I was a big boy.  No, I was bigger than that.  I was grown-up.  I can remember some things, like I can picture my home.  And I know I had a car and I sat in the front seat, not the back, and I even drove it.  And I had big clothes and shoes and I even worked.  

But I don’t remember what work I did or where.  I can picture the office, but that’s it.  I remember I had shoes, but I don’t know what they felt like to wear.  I don’t got shoes now. I’m little and Daddy says little boys need to have little boy feeties.  I don’t miss shoes cuz I don’t remember them anyway and I know bare feet feels so, so nice.  I get to feel the dirt and the mud tween my toes and the soft grass and warm pavement and Daddy don’t feel none of that.  I’m sure bare feeties is better.  

People I used to know when I was big come and see me sometimes.  Sometimes I know their names.  But usually that’s all I remember, except what they look like.  They’re always really nice to me though.  I must have had a lot of friends.  I like it when they visit me at home.  Daddy thinks it’s so funny when I show them my bouncy doodle.  I’m always nakey at home cuz it’s so comfy and my doodle bounces and I like showing my old friends because they look so silly when I do that!  I like their funny faces.  Sometimes they go all red.   

I don’t know why I got little, but I remember when it happened.  I remember it felt really, really good.  It was the best feeling I’ve ever felt.  So I’m sure it was a good thing and Daddy tells me so and Daddy loves me and takes care of me.  I love Daddy and I love my brother Mikey.  We cuddle all the time.  We get all splashy in the bathy together, then Daddy tucks us in and we snuggle up under the covers while he reads to us.  I try to be good, take turns with Mikey at turning pages, at being Daddy’s special helper.  

If we don’t fall asleep while Daddy’s reading, we usually snuggle up even tighter, and our doodles touch.  That feels really nice.  I think it’s the very best feeling in the world.  Mikey likes it too.  It’s okay for us to enjoy our bodies.  Daddy says so.  Me and Mikey rub and rub and his doodle brushing across mine makes me tingle all over, right up into my noggin.  Until I have to make sticky pees.  Mikey squirts his creamies too and we’re such messy boys.  But Daddy doesn’t mind.  He cleans us up every morning.  Daddy knows how to fix everything. 

 I want to stay with Daddy and Mikey forever and ever.  

**

Adam flicked through his favourite album on his phone once again.  There it was, his favourite photo, the one Mary snapped for him.  Sammy standing in the living room, shorts around his ankles, penis so erect it was almost touching his belly button, streaks of cum all over his front-side.  And the look on his face… just like the others.  She’d caught the moment he lost all his smarts, all his big grown-up thoughts and abilities.  He had that expression of slack-jawed wonder, eyes totally glazed over, head lolling to his right side.  Hard to believe it had been three months since that night.  

The doorbell interrupted Adam’s reminiscing.  He headed to the door and greeted Brian.  The twenty-nine year old man had been Sam’s poker buddy.  He was one of the better friends, agreeing to come by and babysit his former mate for the night.  He looked more than a little nervous about it though. 

“Thanks so much for this,” Adam told him.  “I know it’s strange for you.  But Sammy will really appreciate being watched by someone familiar.”  

“No worries,” Brain replied.  “It’s the very least I can do. I can’t imagine having him full time like you do.  It’s really incredible.”  

“Well to be fair he’s at daycare during the days, so it isn’t twenty-four seven,” Adam assured him.  

“Still, it’s a lot and I’m just happy to help out as much as I can.  Sam was always a good mate.”  

“He really was.  And he’s still eager to be your buddy, though in a different way of course,” Adam told him.  

Brian followed him into the living room, pausing and going wide eyed as he saw the two men already there.  Mikey and Sammy were down on their hands and knees, side by side.  Two big bare bottoms presented themselves to the room.  He could see both Mikey and Sammy’s balls and penises clearly dangling between their thighs, unencumbered, smooth and hairless.  The soles of their feet were dirty brown, thick and toughened, like leather.  

Brian had seen his old friend twice since his accident.  Once by chance at the supermarket and once for a meet-up at a cafe.  Both times Sammy had been dressed in a t-shirt, shorts and bare feet.  So the state of his soles wasn’t too surprising.  But his nudity hadn’t been expected.  

“Oh… he’s… um…” Brian muttered.  

Adam couldn’t help but grin.  He loved showing his boys off like this, showing old friends how silly and simple they were.  Brian was already blushing and that made Adam’s cock swell in his pants.  

“Yes they’re little nudists I’m afraid.  It’s just impossible to keep clothes on either of them.”  

“Oh yeah… it’s just, Sam was always so… y’know, well dressed…” 

Adam chuckled.  “Yes, he was a very formal man.  But you have to understand that Sam is long gone.  He’s just simple little Sammy now.  He’s a toddler in a big body.  And toddlers don’t have any concept of modesty.”  

Brian nodded and continued into the room.  

“Mikey, Sammy, come say hello to your babysitter,” Adam prompted.  

The two naked men spun around.  Sammy looked up at his old poker friend, settling in a squatting position, chewing on the Batman action figure he’d been playing with, wedging the legs deep into his mouth.  

Adam always wondered at moments like this if something would click in Sammy’s head.  Would seeing an old friend trigger something, some echo of his adult thoughts?  

“Hi there Sam… er, Sammy.  Do you remember me? It’s Brian,” the babysitter greeted his old friend.  

Sammy let the Batman toy drop to the floor. He gaped open-mouthed at Adam and announced, “Daz Bwian.”  

Adam nodded.  “It sure is.  Do you remember him?”  

Sammy nodded.  “Bwian fwiend!” he chirped happily, then stood up and hurried across the room to his old buddy, his dangling penis bouncing back and forth, until he threw his arms around the awkward looking man and gave him a big cuddle.  

Brian gently patted his old friend’s bare back, waiting for the squeeze to end. Adam just shook his head.  Nope, not a flicker of awareness from poor little Sammy.  

“Well, you all have a good evening and you boys be good for Brian, okay?” 

Mikey and Sammy nodded seriously, with the latter finally releasing poor Brian from the cuddle. Both boys gave their Daddy a big good-bye cuddle and then it was all left to Brian.  

“So what do you boys want to do?” Brian asked, still looking quite uncertain about the whole situation, still trying to avoid looking at the two naked men’s penises, especially his old friend’s.  

Sammy smiled broadly.  Somehow, instinctively, he knew exactly what he wanted to do. 

“Lez watch toons!”  

The End