Going insane reading this wikipedia quote about the real life Cocaine Bear, which is taxidermied and kept in a mall in Kentucky (though it may actually be a different, unrelated, taxidermied bear)

According to the bear's owners, the Cocaine Bear has the authority to officiate legally binding weddings in the mall where it is kept due to Kentucky's marriage laws. This claim is only partly true; the bear does not have the authority to solemnize weddings, but the state of Kentucky cannot invalidate marriages performed by unqualified persons if the parties believe that the person marrying them has the authority to do so. As such, it is a belief in the Cocaine Bear's authority that allows it to officiate legally binding weddings in Kentucky.

You have to BELIEVE in the power of your Cocaine Bear Marriage for it to take effect. Fucking magical.

EVERYONE DRINK WATER RIGHT NOW AND REBLOG TO KEEP THE HYDRATION GANG CHAIN GOING

““Just remember that sometimes, the way you think about a person isnt the way they actually are.” - John Green”

—

flyandfamousblackgirls

“Trans women obviously don’t benefit much from male privilege because the majority live in poverty due to large scale job and housing discrimination. If transgender women are assertive and declare themselves as equals, they try to push them into a docile role or otherwise question their womanhood (‘because [real] women are docile and non-assertive’). They police the gender expressions of trans women and claim if transgender women present feminine, that they’re pushing patriarchal gender roles. If they present as masculine or aren’t attracted to men, they’re “fake transgender” and “don’t really identify as women” (‘because the criteria for womanhood is dressing a certain way and liking a certain gender’). When trans women are victims of male violence, the first thought is that it’s her fault and that she tricked someone into having sex with her (which time and time again have been shown to be false despite the assumptions and stereotype). These same people also participate in rape culture by hyper-sexualizing trans women, claiming that most transgender women are prostitutes and thus are responsible for their own rapes when the 50% statistic is pointed out (victim blaming, anyone?). That also goes further to portray all transgender women as rapists, waiting in the dark corners of bathrooms to rape poor, defenseless little girls. So in addition to denying them victimhood when raped, they also cast them into the antagonist role of their rapists with nothing to base that on besides their own phobia. The anti transgender- or rather, anti trans woman movement is misogyny, rape culture, and patriarchy with a fresh new coat of paint- the anti-thesis of feminism masquerading in a Trojan horse purporting to represent women’s best interests. That’s why all these chants about trans women pushing patriarchy and gender roles are so hilarious. You just really have to sit back and observe the hypocrisy.”

— Konjo Monroe, Lipstickalley on the double standards of viewing trans women through bias. (via scorpiquarius)

helloooooo one and all! welcomebacktoanotherepisodeofdimension20neverafter! i'm your humbledungeonmasterbrennanleemulliganwiojkfldslkjdflkintrepidheroes sayhiintrepidheroes!

sunbathe

“Bilinguals overwhelmingly report that they feel like different people in different languages. It is often assumed that the mother tongue is the language of the true self. (…) But, if first languages are reservoirs of emotion, second languages can be rivers undammed, freeing their speakers to ride different currents.”

�� Love in Translation by Lauren Collins from the New Yorker, August 8 & 15, 2016   (via waltzingwithmidnight)

wordfather

🪤

hey check out this delicious cheese free for the taking

liminalspacetext

houngh fuck yeah chease

Don’t 🙅🙅❌❌ Tell lies 🥸

Go 🚶‍♀️to school 📝👩‍🏫📚🎓

Don’t 🚫👎 🙅‍♀️ Drink Water🚱 🚱🚱🚱🚱🚱🚱🚱🚱🚱🚱

“i come from lesbianism. we use herbs”

— ally beardsly

anti0ch

in a swamp

anti0ch

or in a bog

anti0ch

there’s nothing finer

anti0ch

than a frog ���

frogginbloggin

in the mud

frogginbloggin

or by the road

frogginbloggin

there’s nothing slicker

frogginbloggin

than a toad!!

nyanymous

in a shoe

nyanymous

or in a boot

nyanymous

there’s nothing neater

nyanymous

than a newt!

thresher-sharks

in the moss

thresher-sharks

or in a pail

thresher-sharks

there’s nothing dearer

thresher-sharks

than a snail 🐌

smeliot

By the lamp

smeliot

Or on a cloth

smeliot

There’s nothing sweeter

smeliot

than a Moth!

elixirofdrug

In the grass

elixirofdrug

By the lake

elixirofdrug

There is nothing sneakier

elixirofdrug

Than a snake 🐍

mango-dolphin

when you

mango-dolphin

hrngh

mango-dolphin

you

mango-dolphin

BEE

bread--quest

[ID: A small drawing of a fuzzy bee with a smiley face. End ID.]

where-am-i-nblwnblm

On a flower

where-am-i-nblwnblm

Or by my knee

where-am-i-nblwnblm

There’s nothing buzzier

where-am-i-nblwnblm

Than a bee!

lawariano

On a Rock

helloooooo one and all! welcomebacktoanotherepisodeofdimension20neverafter! i'm your humbledungeonmasterbrennanleemulliganwiojkfldslkjdflkintrepidheroes sayhiintrepidheroes!

I dream of being the most comfortable

-Pib being a mood

saw a very weird post urging people to Reblog Everything so as to fight the potential algorithmification of Tumblr and I'm like

have you literally never unfollowed someone because they post so much it drowns out everything else on your dash? what are you talking about?

and so that this isn't just a subtumbl allow me to suggest a more effective way to increase reblogs on here:

Hey Tumblr newbies

did you know

you can make multiple blogs under the same account on here!

it's really easy!

so if you have a couple Special Interests that you don't want to flood the uninterested with (thank you for that)

you do not have to restrain yourself!

this has been a spontaneous midnight PSA you're welcome etc

The lady said BUTTHOLES, Sam!

" " -

meme-conservation

Ea-Nasir

Conservation status: Least Concern

Classification: Non-native, non-invasive

The Ea-Nasir meme was believed by experts to be extinct since 1750 BCE until a live population was uncovered in 1953 CE. The meme remained critically endangered until introduction to the tumblr ecosystem circa 2015. Ea-Nasir is now a thriving meme and we are proud to classify this species as Least Concern thanks to your conservation efforts.

meme-conservation

Thank you for your interest! We here at the TACM are happy to receive questions from the public.

In 1953, the surviving population of Ea-Nasir memes were found in Ur. The memes, having endured for thousands of years in the absence of internet users, were subsisting entirely on clay tablets.

tachyon-at-rest

Now, ironically, this meme survives on the internet due to high quality copper wires.

"And once and for all we'll show her what money can't buy. It can't buy a town that comes together!"

DONG!

DONG!

DONG!