“”EXPECTO PATRONUM!” Harry yelled. Nothing happened. Harry gripped his dick tighter and shook it up and down until a thick, whispy white substance protruded from the end of it.”
“Panting, Harry fell forwards over the hydrangea bush, straightened up and stared around. There were several faces peering through various nearby windows. Harry stuffed his dick hastily back into his jeans and tried to look innocent.”
“He had not been this close to Malfoy since he had watched him muttering to Crabbe and Goyle during Dumbledore’s speech about Cedric. He could feel a kind of ringing in his ears. His hand gripped his dick under his robes”
“My dick.” Said Ron. “Look at my dick.” It had snapped, almost in two, and the tip was dangling limply, held on by only a few spare splinters.
1. How do you… you know… do it?
2. Are you sure you’re a lesbian?
3. Which one of you is “the boy”?
4. What is scissoring?
5. Is it weird to have friends who are girls? Are you ever attracted to your friends who are girls? How do they feel about it?
6. But… you’re so pretty! You wear dresses. I don’t get it?!
7. How do you know you’re actually a lesbian? Like, are you sure?
8. But… you… but you… dated guys?
9. Do you fear what God will think?
10. My [insert friend, distant family member, or neighbour] is a lesbian, do you know her?
11. Is it because you hate men?
12. It must be so cool to have two closets and more makeup and shit?
13. Being with another women must be so much easier?
14. You’re attractive for a lesbian, aren’t you?
15. Don’t you miss real sex?
16. Do you hate straight people then?
17. I’ve always wanted to be a lesbian but I just don’t think I can give up sex with men, you know?
18. Did you choose to be a lesbian?
19. If you like girls who look like men…why don’t you date men?
20. Do you guys just use toys?
21. So can I watch???
22. Is that you sister? Cos you really look sisters?
23. I bet you really like Ellen?
24. Are you sure this lesbian thing isn’t just a phase?
25. Is your life really like the L Word?
26. Have you always been a lesbian?
27. I’ve never been to a gay wedding, can I come to yours?
28. Why do all lesbian dress like boys?
29. Oh so that’s why we didn’t work out?
30. I always wanted to be a lesbian, but…
31. Are you sure you don’t want to be with a man again?
32. Will you use a sperm donor or use someone you know to get pregnant?
33. You’re a lesbian? What a waste !