@11mm
wincing the night away

lydia. 27. lesbian.
art, women, television, & movies

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Last update
2020-12-01 02:32:36

    THE MENTAL LOAD

    💭The mental load means always having to remember. It’s almost completely borne by women. It’s permanent and exhausting work.

    Of course, there’s nothing genetic or innate about this behavior. But we’re borne into a society, in which we see our mothers in charge of household management, while our fathers only execute the instructions.

    And in which culture and media essentially portray women as mothers and wives, while men are heroes who go on fascinating adventures away from home.

    And while women are more and more present in the workforce, they still remain the only ones in charge of the household. When we become mothers, this double responsibility blows up in our face.

    That’s why you find fathers with children who are already a few years old, and who still don’t know where to buy their clothes, what to feed them, when they need their vaccination, or even the nanny’s phone number.

    Starting a conversation about the mental load can help even things up between a couple, and can bring you closer together.
    If you’re both keeping track of household chores and sharing the work, you’ll both have more time to devote to each other and less time feeling resentful or downtrodden. © The Mental Load by Emma 🎨

    Everybody’s story is different. There’s your version and my version and everything in between. But the only thing that all of those stories have in common is that moment right before you say those words, when your heart is racing and you don’t know what’s coming next. That moment’s really terrifying. And then once you say those words, you can’t unsay them. A chapter has ended, and a new one’s begun, and you have to be ready for that. You can’t do it for anyone else.

    Happiest Season (2020)
    d
    ir. Clea DuVall