SIMPLE PLAN PLAYED WHATS NEW SCOOBY DOO AT EPCOT

The Des Moines Register, Iowa, March 28, 1916

I be checking my phone like I mean something to somebody lmao

valykas

This is amazing

theboycourt

Ok but how did they make it look like he was driving

2002bape

YOOOO SO LOOK DA FIRST TIME I EVER GOT ON DIS RIDE I WAS WITH A WHITE FAMILY AND U KNOW WHITE FOLKS CRAZY SO DEY DONT FEAR ROLLER COASTERS OR DEATH IN GENERAL. AFTER ABOUT 10 MINUTES OF TELLIN DEM DAT I DIDNT WANNA GET ON I FINALLY SAID YES CUZ I AINT NEVER BEEN NO BITCH AND I DIDNT PLAN ON STARTING THAT DAY. WHEN DA ENGINEER SAID “PLS LEAN BACK AND KEEP THE BACK OF UR HEAD PRESSED AGAINST YOUR SEAT” AND I SAW EVERYBODY STICK DA BACK OF THEIR HEADS TO THE CHAIR I KNEW DAT I MADE DA WORST DECISION OF MY LIFE CUZ I EVEN SAW SOME BLACK FOLKS LISTEN AND U KNOW DAT WHEN BLACK PEOPLE LISTEN A WHITE LADY’S ADVICE , ITS DA REAL DEAL. SO MY FIRST MISTAKE WAS REFUSING TO PRESS MY HEAD AGAINST THE SEAT… THE RIDE TAKES OFF AND MY DOME SLAMS AGAINST THE CHAIR WHILE MY NECK SNAPPED… UNCONSCIOUS INSTANTLY.. WHEN I AWOKE FROM MY 3 SECOND SLUMBER WE HAD REACHED DA VERY TOP OF THE RIDE WHERE THE RIDE MAKES A QUICK PAUSE… WHEN THE RIDE MADE THAT PAUSE I OPENED MY EYES CAUSE I THOUGHT THE RIDE WAS OVER AND WE ALL MADE IT SAFELY. BOY WAS I WRONG… I OPENED MY EYES AND DA ONLY THING I SAW WAS A 300 FOOT DROP STRAIGHT TO DA GROUND SO I SAID “GOD YOU CANT LET ME DIE LIKE DIS”. I THINK I SUFFERED A HEART CONTUSION CUZ MY HEART JUST COMPLETELY STOPPED BEATING… AND THAN THE RIDE TAKES OFF AGAIN… WE MAKE THE 300 FOOT DROP AND I SCREAM MY LUNGS OUT AS IM SCARED TO DEATH BECAUSE DA ONLY TIME A HUMAN SHOULD BE DAT HIGH IN DA AIR IS WHEN THEIR SPIRIT IS BEING SUCKED INTO HEAVEN BY DA GRACE OF GOD.. SO WE SAFELY MAKE IT TO DA END OF DA RIDE AND WHEN WE GET OFF I STUMBLE OUT OF THE SEAT CUZ MY LEGS WENT NUMB AND ALL THE AIR WAS SUCKED OUT OF MY BODY SO I COULDNT TALK EITHER.. DA FIRST THING THESE CRAZY MOTHERFUCKERS TELL ME IS “HEY MAN LETS DO THAT AGAIN THAT WAS WICKED”. I LOOKED AT DEM AND I REALIZED DAT DIS WHITE KID DAT I BEFRIENDED WAS ACTUALLY SATAN. I NO LONGER HAVE ANY WHITE FRIENDS.

totallynotmisha

please read this whole thing.

srsfunny

Hospital T-Rex

official-liberty-prime

Imagine being rushed into the ER and reading this as they push you through though

celticpyro

At least it means you’re the speed reading champion and the world is about to lose an icon.

during sex

girlfriend: why are u laughing

me: thought of a meme

cannon-fannon

THIS SPEAKS TO ME ON A MOLECULAR LEVEL RIGHT NOW.

rtahuniverse

You are witnessing a broken human being

mauridianhallow

This is actually me like constantly now

queensarcasrn

The older I get the more I identify with this when I come across it

spock-sock

I just got a new humidifier and I am fuckin’ pumped

(via intenselycreamy)

kadijah-applebum

Wow me

carbonated-milk-deactivated2016

hey if ur ever feelin shitty use this

azkabanescapee

Holy shit I’m trying not to cry.

the1975-bastille

i really needed this one tonight

gingerb3ard

omfg

i-guess-im-okay

Do it!!!

quitebisexual

Reblogging because this is great for anyone needing support rn

i’d probably join a gang if it meant free fruit roll ups

sixpenceee

Bill Nye the Science Guy walking the catwalk at New York Men’s Fashion Week 2017 

steezegoddess

BILL BILL BILL BILL BILL BILL

ninemoons42

HOLY SHIT

when ur heart does the !!!!! thing when someone texts you and youre like fuck…prolly gonna fall in love with them

You can’t change a person who doesn’t see an issue in their actions.

(via words-of-emotion)

Good Vibes here

(via words-of-emotion)

Something I wish more people would understand…

reyskywalker

WATCH THIS

periru3

I just went from having 0 feelings either negative or positive about Taylor Lautner and after watching this and with no other knowledge of him as a person I fully believe that he is a gift to humanity if for nothing other than this single contribution.

thatsthat24

I… I want Taylor Lautner… to be friends with me.

fitjyn

I loved him before but now I’m 12x deeper

Just because

I don’t talk to you,

or text you first,

doesn’t mean

I don’t miss you.

I’m just waiting for you to miss me.

@sexual-texts (via sexual-texts)