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2017-06-12 15:19:16

    The INFP internally feels his or her life intensely. In the relationship arena, this causes them to have a very deep capacity for love and caring which is not frequently found with such intensity in the other types. INFPs do not share their intensity of feeling with anyone; they tend to be reserved about expressing their inner-most feelings, and reserve their deepest love and caring for a select few.

    INFP Relationships
    (via infpaper)

    anonymous

    I tend to get annoyed very easily with INFPs. I am an ESFJ, and my mom is an INFP. So are some peers I don't like. And even one of my closest friends is one. Maybe these aren't stereotypical INFP traits, but the constant daydreaming and inattention to what is actually happening in the moment bugs me. Plus, all the INFPs I know are self-absorbed. Could you explain?

    That is because INFPs have a dominant Fi. Fi is introverted feeling, which makes them, before anything else, consider their inner selves and their values before turning to ideas, common sense, or logic. Whether in a good or bad mood, they will be focused on themselves in one way or another, whether it’s daydreaming or just thinking. It’s almost a sort of defense mechanism or a safety method, since INFPs are incredibly vulnerable to feelings of depression, sadness, anxiety, and stress. Thinking about themselves before anything else helps them to tend to themselves first before all else, but that can lead others to perceive them as self-centered and even stuck-up, like you said. Also, just as they can use Fi as a defense, it can also be their worse enemy. In times of trouble, Fi can torment INFP, and it doesn’t help that Ne is their second function. Basically it means all the negative emotions they feel get amplified when Ne starts to question everything around them, like “Does this person actually like me? Does ANYONE actually like me? What if they all hate me? What should I have done differently?” And Si looks at the past and remembers how things have been, and Te, being the inferior function, “short-circuits” and leaves the INFP feeling hopeless, like they can change nothing about their situation. The INFP function stack can be a death trap. Literally. INFPs have the highest percentage of suicide rates than any other type. And it really is unfortunate because they are actually angels. They may get spells where they’re like “I’m the best! I’m so awesome!! I’m the best jokester, the coolest cat around” but deep inside they have really low opinions of themselves. They really just want you to like and love them, but they will probably never work up the courage to ask you if you really do unless you’re super close to them.

    INFP and INTP conversing

    INTP: I wanna talk about the universe.

    INFP: Did you say.. the univerSE?

    INTP: YES THE UNIVERSE

    INFP: OMG THE UNIVERSE IS SO INFINITE

    INTP and INFP: *make and drag apart about 5 theories of the universe in about 5 mins*

    INTP AND INFP: *legitimate screaming* sO mAnY PoSsibilitieS

    INTP AND INFP: *completely overwhelmed* UNIVVERRRRSEEE

    Advice on Getting to Know INFPs (like, REALLY getting to know them, like on a deeply platonic or romantic level) Part One

    from the perspective of an INFP: yours truly, Anika Ashbourne.

    -INFPs are “idea people”. We’d much rather not talk about the football game or bland politics or it is what it is. No, let’s talk about art and potential and possibilities and theories of the universe and favorite books and why this and how that and why not and what if. Stereotypically, we’re wide-eyed innocent children in the bodies of adults who have our head too far in the clouds to ever come down. While that’s quite an exaggeration, we are very imaginative and abstract in our thinking. We love love love new ideas, new concepts, new things to be obsessed with. Because INFPs are constantly on the lookout for, as I like to call them, “things that click”. A puzzle piece falls into place. A door unlocks, and you’re the key, and suddenly you’re our new favorite person in the world and please don’t go away because you mean very much to me for helping me develop myself or my ambitions further. Advice: to connect with an INFP, don’t be a dull-ass, ordinary, out-of-all-the-things-we-could-talk-about-you-choose-to-talk-about-this?! kind of people.

    -We can tell what you’re trying to do. Just saying. If you’re trying to impress an INFP, they know. If you’re trying to bring down an INFP, they know. If you’re lying to an INFP, they know. If you’re pushing down your emotions in front of an INFP… Oh god, they know. The thing is, we won’t usually let you know that we know, but we know. We can sense it. We have a way of reading people subconsciously. The thing is, we’re so conscious of how we do things and how different our ways of doing things are from other people’s ways, we start to pick up on exactly how each kind of person tends to do things and what the signs are that they’re doing the thing. We do all this without realizing we’re analyzing you, and it gives us a grip on what we think of you. Advice: be real and as honest as you can to INFPs. Don’t try to trick us, because we’re hard to deceive and you’ll lose all our trust and respect at once. Instead, be sincere and show us you’re worth getting to know, too– which isn’t that hard if you’re being genuine, because we like to really know people, too.

    -INFPs are reserved. Yes, we’re the quiet ones in the corner with our notebooks or the kid that never shuts up when they’re talking to friends but never opens their mouth around other people, but it’s more than that. We’re reserved. It takes a while to really get to know an INFP. Some say we’re even more reserved than the INFJs or INTs. This is because we’re open to pain, we let it sting us when it comes and let our emotions flood us so we can taste the tides, but we’d rather avoid it when we can. An INFP that’s been hurt a lot in the past- and, warning, most INFPs have been- is less likely to want to get hurt in the future unless they really believe is worth it. Yes, we’re afraid to get hurt. We are not afraid you’ll hurt us, we are just afraid of the flood that, you have to admit, is sure to come again if you really deeply connect with someone. So we defend ourselves with layers. Hundreds and hundreds of layers, and the longer you stay with us, the more time you spend with us, the more we begin to trust you… those layers peel off. And you’ll know because that’s when we’re incredibly silly around you and fearless in expressing our ideas and we will defend you from every evil thing that comes your way at whatever the personal cost. Until then, we tend to appear as the shy butterfly flittering around on its own, a little ways away from the others. Advice: be patient and be persistent, and earn our trust by being a person we can feel comfortable and happy around.

    -INFPs feel everything at an overwhelmingly deep level… or almost not at all. If you hurt us, you’ve either destroyed us for a while or you’ve only chipped a crack in the layered walls of our castle. If you make us happy, we’re basically either tempted to kiss you and be close to you forever and all eternity and return the favor, or we simply appreciate it and move on. In the overwhelming sense, we will remember it for the rest of our lives and we’ll write about it and sing about it and make art about it and let it fuel is in our quests, or we’ve already forgotten it. Advice: I just hope you realize what you’re doing will either have a very long-term affect or no affect at all. If you’re not sure, you can always ask. INFPs are very willing to help you out, especially if it means further developing our own self or yourself, and you can always always just ask them if what you’ve done is good or bad or nothing. And if it’s bad, apologize ASAP and talk to them about it. If it’s good, well done and keep it up!

    The extrovert's guide in dealing with introverted personalities

    <>SUBMITTED by Steve

    <>INxJs

    <>-They can come off as … weird. Very subjective term because really, who’s to say what’s weird and what isn’t. But given that INxJs are arguably the rarest types and usually out of touch with the physical and concrete, it can definitely make the more down-to-earth extroverts out there feel as though they are alien in some way. But don’t be fooled, because behind those ambiguous stares there is a storm-load of activity going on in their minds. 

    <>- Their hunches can be incredibly valid. Unlike what the stereotype will have you believe, Dom-Ni is NOT a future-predicting function. For one thing, it’s very personal and subjective to each Dom-Ni user and some of them would probably disagree with each other on their hunches. However, they do have an ability to see things that a lot of us will miss. Not through any kind of mystical gift, but rather well thought out speculation. Even if they’re off, chances are they were still very wise in their assessment of things.

    <>- There are usually your typical law-abiding citizen. (Good advice for everyone, not just extroverts) In complete contrast to the first point, INxJs may be way harder to spot than the stereotypes say. INTJs are not scientists working on a cure for cancer or world domination (depending where their Fi is at) and INFJs are not the next coming of Jesus Christ. A lot of them probably work in everyday jobs and there’s a good chance you’ve mistaken them for their S counterparts. Get to know them personally and you’ll see the difference.

    <>ISxJs

    <>- They are hard to get excited. Inferior Ne can be a bitch sometimes. Throwing fun suggestions at an ISxJ may often result in“Meh…” or “I don’t know…” Of all types, they are usually the hardest to pull out of their comfort zone. If you suggest something to them and they start bombarding you with questions such as ’‘What time? Who will be there? How does it work?”  etc. don’t get irritated because that actually means you’ve tickled their interest and now they’re just trying to cover all their bases. 

    <>- They are experts in their fields. Si-Doms tend to have very few interests in life, but what does interest them, they probably know the insides and outs of it, like no other. They love to study at length what peaks their interest and in this case, their factual knowledge about things is usually second to none. They are the definition of “vested interest”. Also note that they are geeks in disguise, so just like NP types, do not criticize old stuff they have an attachment to. They still like something from the 80’s? Then so shall it be. Telling them it’s stupid for them not to move on is actually much more hurtful than it looks.

    <>- Their loyalty and commitment cannot be doubted. If an ISxJ say they’ll do something, they’ll do it, ‘nuff said. Hell, even if it turns out that it’s actually an inconvenience to them. They just cannot back out of commitment. Of course, stuff can always come up at the last second, in this case, you’ll receive a rain check or heart-felt apology. If an ISxJ actually does flake out, that’s … not okay, but they were probably hesitant about it from the start. 

    <>IxTPs

    <>They are blunt. You want an honest and direct opinion? IxTPs will give you that faster than any other type. In many cases, it can actually feel brutally honest, so more sensitive types may wanna steer clear. Of course, if their opinion is splattered with insults and an impatient tone, then you’re dealing with an unhealthy type and that’s not okay. 

    <>- They are “dispassionate.” Sounds like a really negative trait but what it really means is they are the embodiment of “objective.” IXTPs very rarely take things too seriously with a burning passion flowing through their veins. As of such, cynicism and sarcasm is very likely. Don’t take it the wrong way though, because underneath that, they can offer the most practical advice or at least see things as they are, with no bias and emotional tones tainting their view. And while that can definitely be off-putting, and it can also be extremely useful. 

    <>Don’t try to turn a frog into a prince. I’m sure there is a better way to say this? What I mean is that Inferior Fe, even if healthy and mature, will always find it draining to keep up social appearances. You either appreciate this trait of theirs or keep looking elsewhere. But don’t expect to turn your IXTP love interest into a social butterfly overnight. 

    <>IxFPs

    <>- They march to the beat of their own drum. If Dom-Ni can be hard to decode, prepare yourself for Dom-Fi. Like a fire, it is burning, passionate and unpredictable. Sometimes, even IxFPs themselves can’t pin-point the reason they feel so passionate about a given subject. Don’t try to constantly size up a Fi-Dom, you’ll get exhausted. Even their closest friends and family often have a hard time reading what’s going on in their mind. Respect their privacy and their inner world and don’t force them to lay out how they feel on the table. 

    <>- Support their causes. If an IxFP feels strongly about something, then this is unwavering to them. They will fight for what they believe in to thebone. You either support it or stay clear but telling them they’re wrong or it’s a waste of time may turn you into an “enemy” in their eyes. 

    <>- Do NOT attempt to control them. Offering sound advice? Sure. But any shade of “You should do this…” not only falls on deaf ears but may actually cause them to do the exact opposite out of spite. Dom-Fi is the ultimate free spirit who wants to experience life on its own terms and Inferior Te does NOT want to be told what to do. This can be pretty hard at times though. You see an IXFP loved one acting recklessly (ISFP) or acting on a crazy idea (INFP) it’s only normal for you to want to steer them on a straight path, but in actuality it will be counter-productive. Just stay clear and let them learn from thei<>r mistakes, IF it’s actually a mistake to begin with. You’d be surprised how many times acting on one’s own accord can pay off in the long run. There’s many world-renowned musicians and artists who could probably vouch for that.