artistsfuneral

    I'm simply putting this here because I want your opinion on this... Thing that I just encountered. Tldr: Whoever decided to introduce Old High german to the author I just read needs to pay for their sins. Tell me who on gods green earth starts writing a sex scene in English, while the characters are speaking in one of the unsexiest dead languages to ever exist. No offense but reading "ô jâ, mîne gimpelgempel!" Might have taken 20 years off of my life span.

    Thoughts on people using old high German for sex scenes?

    😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 Okkokk hold on, I actually have a lot to say about this!

    1. German is the top unsexiest language ever. For someone who is into dirty talk, this is the worst thing ever. It's pure lemon-face, curling inwards cringe, don't ever come at me saying "Ooooh deine Schnecke ist so feucht, ich steck da jetzt meinen riesen Schwängel rein" I am disgusted by myself. Just no. Don't. Fucking hell, never do that. 💀💀💀

    2. Resident Evil (video game) has an amazing fanbase and a character named Karl Heisenberg who's origin is German. Every damn smut scene, no matter how good it is, is absolutely ruined the moment he starts talking German. Because for some reason the fandom has decided that Liebling is the go to pet name. Do you what horrible sentences I have encountered????? Fuck no. Don't Liebling me.

    3. I am. Also. Kind of. Guilty of randomly using German in a fic. BUTTTT. I use it for insults. Which is a perfect usage of my mother tongue :) Having Jaskier suddenly screaming "Halt dein dummes Maul du pimmliger Flachwichser" is a kind of really satisfying thing to write. German is really good to be annoyed/angry. English is good for sex.

    4. Also, and this is a personal pet peeve, kind of hate it when non-German speakers only ever use "Ich liebe dich" for all sort of different I love you's and never "hab dich lieb" which I just find a lot more fitting in many situations.

    5. I don't remember who it was, but someone wrote a German witcher fic where Geralt only spoke either sächsisch or schwäbisch and honestly that was fucking hilarious.

    But no. German as a language should never ever ever be used in a sex scene. Never. 💀

    captainsy-cookiemonster

    i'm german and i agree with the first point. german doesn't belong in any sexy context ever. it's cringe and german dirty talk does the opposite of what it should be doing... yeah...

    audioroleplayconfessions

    Can I get some angst recommendations? Particularly if it's part of a longer story-based series. I wanna cry.

    Audios that have made me legitimately cry:

    Space Pirate Saga by Good Boy Audios The Neon Barbarian/Neon Wings duology by Escaped Audios

    Audios that have almost made me cry:

    Lullaby 3 by Scythe Audio Chronus Seven by Escaped Audios (again) Inversion by Redacted Audio Finding a Fallen Star by Vik Lendvay

    escapedaudios

    Honored to have made yet another person cry

    captainsy-cookiemonster

    Sadist 😒

    mayloma

    Challenge: You're starring in a movie with the last person you saved in your camera roll and the last song you listened to is the title.

    Thank you so much for tagging me @deandoesthingstome â£ï¸

    And OMG, this is so fucking perfect!! Hsakfregbhbfd

    I'm bulletproof, nothing to lose

    Fire away, fire away

    Ricochet, you take your aim

    Fire away, fire away

    You shoot me down, but I won't fall

    I am titanium

    Okay, I want to write this!! I NEED to write this!!!!

    No pressure tags for @ellethespaceunicorn @thesaucynomad @cardierreh15 @ylva-syverson @shellyshellshell @mrs-solo-walker and everyone who would like to play as well 🤗

    ellethespaceunicorn

    Thank you for the tag @mayloma and @mrs-solo-walker

    It's cute in a way

    'Til you cannot speak

    And you leave to have a cigarette

    Knees get weak

    Escape was just a nod

    And a casual wave

    Obsessed about it

    Heavy for the next two days

    Oh fuck, was this the intended reaction to this little game? Because August Walker and these lyrics are doing something to me. But, damnit, I'm working on Wolfie and Pup right now. Soon, August, very soon...

    No pressure tags: @peyton-warren @geralts-yenn @raccoon-eyed-rebel @viking-raider @ronearoundblindly @sarahdonald87 @adulting-sucks

    fivequartersoftheorange

    Quick warnings: p in v sex, noncon vibes, dark Clark

    --------------

    Clark Kent likes to think of himself as a mild-mannered man. Patient to a fault, not prone to bouts of temper, always the perfect gentleman as he moves through his community.

    Until his new neighbor arrives.

    Tiny little thing prancing around her house in fluttery summer dresses. 

    He watches as she works the earth between her fingers, skin flushed from her efforts, and her hair, black as a raven's wing, sticking to her neck in the arid heat.

    As Clark stared at her, he became aware of tension building in his muscles, hairs rising on the back of his neck. The gnawing ache in his teeth grows stronger, he shrugs it off trying to ease the tension but he spies a bead of sweat disappear in the valley between her breasts. 

    Lust so primal snakes it's way through his body. He wants to browbeat her into submission, shove her face down into the bed, the sheets muffling her cries as he fucks his cock into her.

    Fuck her full again and again till it takes. Sink his teeth into her round, milk-heavy breasts till they're puffy and swollen. 

    He could do it. 

    Yes. 

    Yes, he'd do it now. 

    captainsy-cookiemonster

    🥴🥴🥴