Pansy: Come on, just do it, it’s just a silly prank

    Draco: No, Pansy, I’m not going to commit a crime with you. I’m too pretty for Azkaban

    Pansy: If you do it, Harry might arrest you in his Auror robes

    Draco: ...

    Draco: I guess it’s just a silly prank after all, no big deal, I can do it

    Pansy *coughs*: Slut

    Draco: Shut up, Pansy, let’s do it

    Auror Harry: Thank you for healing me

    Healer Draco: It’s what I do

    Auror Harry: I also have another injury that might need your magical touch

    Healer Draco: Oh, where?

    Auror Harry: Between my legs

    Healer Draco: ...

    Healer Draco: Why are you here in St. Mungo’s?

    Auror Harry: I got a scratch

    Healer Draco: You could easily heal this yourself

    Auror Harry: I lost my wand

    Healer Draco: ...It’s in your hand

    Auror Harry: Oh well there it is! I totally forgot!

    Healer Draco: ...

    Healer Draco: Are you positive?

    Auror Harry: Yes, I have a very positive outlook on life

    Healer Draco: ...I mean your blood type, Harry. Are you a B positive or negative?

    Auror Harry: Oh...negative

    Speak Up - Drarry

    Summary:Potter is acting strange by complimenting him in the middle of an Auror meeting, inviting him to his New Year’s party and Draco isn’t sure how to react to that

    Word count: 8775

    Tags: Post-Hogwarts; Explicit Sexual Content; Auror Harry Potter; Auror Draco Malfoy; Top Harry Potter; Bottom Draco Malfoy; Mutual Pining; Idiots In Love; Smut

    READ HERE ON AO3

    The File - Drarry

    Summary:Draco sees a file with his name but full of pornography on Harry’s computer. Harry is absolutely screwed

    Word count: 6824

    Tags: Post-Hogwarts; Explicit Sexual Content; Roommates; Living Together; Auror Harry Potter; Healer Draco Malfoy; Top Harry Potter; Bottom Draco Malfoy; Pining Harry Potter; Harry Potter is Bad at Feelings

    READ HERE ON AO3

    that one time Ron almost ruins Harry’s birthday party - Drarry

    Summary:Ron has to get a stripper for Harry’s 40th birthday party, but he messes it up

    That’s it, that’s the plot.

    Word count: 8882

    Tags: Post-Hogwarts; Explicit Sexual Content; Birthday fic; Auror Harry Potter; Healer Draco Malfoy; Top Harry Potter; Bottom Draco Malfoy; Stripper Draco Malfoy; Shameless Smut

    READ HERE ON AO3

    For Harry’s birthday

    that one time Ron almost ruins Harry’s birthday party - Drarry

    Summary:Ron has to get a stripper for Harry’s 40th birthday party, but he messes it up

    That’s it, that’s the plot.

    Word count: 8882

    Tags: Post-Hogwarts; Explicit Sexual Content; Birthday fic; Auror Harry Potter; Healer Draco Malfoy; Top Harry Potter; Bottom Draco Malfoy; Stripper Draco Malfoy; Shameless Smut

    READ HERE ON AO3

    For Harry’s birthday

    Kiss Me, Potter - Drarry

    Summary:Draco will normally ignore all the unnecessary things around him, but when he sees Harry being cornered by a rather too flirty guy, Draco decides to jump in and pretend to be Harry's boyfriend.

    Well, it still works out alright after all.

    Word count: 8256

    Tags: Post-Hogwarts; Healer Draco Malfoy; Auror Harry Potter; Denial of Feelings; Shameless Smut; I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping; Explicit Sexual Content; Shower Sex; Top Harry Potter; Bottom Draco Malfoy

    READ HERE ON AO3

    (Birthday fic for @gaeilgelupin)

    Harry: Hi, is Draco here?

    Healer: And who may I say is wanting to see him?

    Harry: I’m Harry

    Healer: Harry of...?

    Harry: ...Of Harry and Draco

    Ron: Where are you going?

    Harry: Er, St. Mungo, snake bite

    Hermione: That looks like human bite

    Ron: Did you bite your own arm so you can meet Draco?

    Harry: What? Pfft, no way! Me? Meeting Draco just because he’s a Healer there and I don’t get to see him unless it’s in St. Mungo? Pfft, absolutely not. Is that why I also faked being sick last week and even hexed myself to meet him? No way

    Ron: Oh, alright then, good luck!

    Hermione: *sighs*

    Ron: Where are you going?

    Harry: Er, St. Mungo, snake bite

    Hermione: That looks like human bite

    Ron: Did you bite your own arm so you can meet Draco?

    Harry: What? Pfft, no way! Me? Meeting Draco just because he’s a Healer there and I don’t get to see him unless it’s in St. Mungo? Pfft, absolutely not. Is that why I also faked being sick last week and even hexed myself to meet him? No way

    Ron: Oh, alright then, good luck!

    Hermione: *sighs*

    Draco: Can you believe it? Potter just went from annoying little git to full daddy mode in Auror robes now, Pansy

    Pansy: And you just went from death eater to dick eater real quick, Draco

    Healer Draco: That’s it, Auror Potter, you can go now

    Auror Harry:

    Healer Draco: Do you have a question?

    Auror Harry: Your hair is pretty

    Healer Draco: Not a question, but thank you

    Auror Harry: Would the healer mind if I smelled it?

    Healer Draco: …Now is probably a good time to tell you that I don’t date my patients

    Auror Harry: Well, maybe I should tell you that I never don’t not date my Healer—

    Ron *drags Harry away*: Okay, stop, come on, Harry. Let’s go