Diaper Desires
Last update
2023-11-13 09:28:36

    Tips on becoming diaper dependent?

    Theres a lot of tips i could tell you, but to make it short.

    Wear and use your diapers! Stay in them.. there's no excuses. No "I dont wanna rn" or "in a minute" Training is just repeating the same baby steps until you can't trust yourself being out of a diaper. Dont be over eager expecting everything to come at once. Its a lot of little improvements. I like the fact that I documented mine, so that I can see my own growth.

    Get good diapers! You will have to learn the limits of what they can hold. So you can change before a leak. Wear a undershirt to tuck into your pants so you don't have to worry about your diap peeking out. And enjoy! Remind yourself how good you're doing! How fun exciting it is. It helps to have a friend that knows. If you're too scared find a online friend that already has interest. (Watch out for bad ppl! Most ppl in the community are super sweet!)

    Feel free to ask more specific questions!

    Hugs and kissies πŸ€—πŸ₯°

    So yesterday, I was drunk coming back from the eagle. Going home after an amazing time with some of the Leather Family. Out of nowhere, I got out of the train and had felt the sudden urge to poop. But I ignored it because i was hungry, and I knew I could hold it. (So I thought)...

    Then I ordered my food, and while ordering, I just felt the poop just slide out in my diaper. I instantly got perplexed and was watching if anyone smelled or noticed. But no one was in the store, so I went to the corner section of the store just to push the rest out. Once my food was ready, I paid and left and walked two blocks to my house.

    I got to my house and pressed on the back of my diaper and then went on to watch a movie as I sat in my stinky diaper. Didn't change till the very next morning and leaked all over my bed.

    On diminishing returns

    The funny thing about continence is it's not about how much of it is present, but how much of it is absent.

    When untrainers talk about being incontinent, we talk about having no control. When people say they want to lose bowel control, they mean they want to fill their diapers, not that they want to pass a lot of gas. When they say they want to lose bladder control, they mean they want to not feel themselves pee at all, not that they want to lose a few drops on the occasional sneeze. When they say they want to be bedwetters, they want to be wet every night, not one night a month. We take no control quite literally.

    But there's another meaning of no control which is equally important to the untraining process: the state of having practically no control, which is quite different.

    The thing about control is that it's a matter of consensus, not majority vote. Here's an example. There are two forms of nocturnal enuresis (NE), or bedwetting: episodic and chronic. Episodic NE is relatively rare and not much present in the public consciousness; it's what you see in people who have drunk too much and wet themselves as a result. Chronic NE is what we more usually mean when we say "bedwetting".

    Chronic NE obviously requires bedwetting to happen at a certain frequency. You and I are connoisseurs and intellectuals and therefore we know that someone who makes it to the toilet 51% of the time is closer to making it 100% of the time (complete continence) than they are to making it 0% of the time (complete incontinence). If that was the only thing we knew we might therefore reasonably infer that someone didn't qualify as having chronic NE (true bedwetting) unless they were having 4+ wet nights per week. The reality, however, is that the threshold is actually 2+ wet nights per week, even though 2 is clearly fewer than 50%. Because we do know facts other than the one I mentioned above, this does not (I assume) surprise us. [note 1]

    For the sake of argument, though, why 2? There's nothing about a condition being chronic that means it has to happen twice or more per week. All that's required for a condition to be chronic is that it's persistent and long-lasting. By that token, being wet an average of 1 night out of every 365.2425 should also qualify. This would include people who have alcohol-related acute NE and drink once a year, but there's no reason that should be a problem. Why 2 nights a week?

    The answer is obvious: practicality. If someone wets themself only when they drink alcohol to excess, then the path of least resistance is, in most cases, going to be for them to drink less alcohol; modelling it as a continence issue is unhelpful. If someone wets themself at random, an average of 1 night per year, they're probably going to find it annoying and distressing, but wearing diapers to bed every night would be massive overkill.

    On the other hand, there clearly would be a point where you did need to wear diapers to bed 7 nights per week. It would also clearly be before the point where you were actually wetting 7 nights per week. It would be at a point where the probability of you wetting was high enough on every night that it was worthwhile to wear diapers. "2 nights/week" is one group of diagnosticians' attempt to find that point for a particular patient group.

    For chronic NE, that point is the point of practically no control. How does that work, you might think, they're still dry at night close to seventy percent of the time. Quite true! But that point is the point of practically no control because it is the point at which the continence interventions they need to use are the same as the interventions which would be used by someone with no control whatsoever. If you have to wear diapers seven nights a week then the fact that you only wet them two nights a week is no longer practically relevant. There's no ranking scale; someone who's consistently wet two nights a week is exactly as much of a bedwetter as someone who hasn't had a single dry night in ten years.

    Of course, the flipside is that someone who hits practically no control can descend to no control even in theory quite fast, because the incentive to maintain control evaporates. If you're going to have to wear diapers seven nights a week regardless then it makes fuck-all difference whether they're wet two or seven nights a week, and consequently it makes fuck-all difference whether you can avoid wetting them.


    • This is actually for paediatric nocturnal enuresis. Because bedwetting is less frequent and normative in adults the threshold could arguably be set lower, say 1 night per fortnight to 1 night per month.

    Not a novel observation from me but: untraining entails going into diapers 24/7, and the mechanics of being 24/7 β€” without any specific reference to untraining β€” themselves encourage untraining and make it more difficult to get out of diapers, for reasons that are both mechanical and organic. In no particular order:


    Diapers are physically harder to take off than underwear and you're far less likely to be able to put them back on once they're off.


    Switching from diapers to underwear is difficult to pull off without a shower, because even if you haven't been using your diapers, proper diaper hygiene is not really underwear-friendly, and if you have been using your diapers, even if you're very hygienic you're still going to smell weird.


    If you're in diapers and comfortable with using them, you have a financial incentive to use them because not doing so is wasting a diaper, and diapers cost money.


    If you're in diapers, depending on how much privacy you have you may have an incentive to use them because wetting them is quieter and, at least initially, more deniable than taking them off.


    If you're in diapers, you are much less often incentivised not to void than you would be if you were in underwear. This might mean that you can void when others literally can't β€” for instance if you're in an area with no toilets and nowhere secluded enough to pee. It also just means that it's constantly very easy for you to void when it's difficult for others β€” you can pee in class, others have to get up and leave.

    This tends to have an impact eventually because while someone might not actually want to untrain, it also becomes increasingly obvious that they don't have an actual reason to wait and therefore it becomes easier not to. People tend to eventually take the path of least resistance.


    This may be a personal observation, but I honestly think you're incentivised not to take wet diapers off because then they cool down from body temperature and Cold Pee Feels Extremely Weird.


    The more layers you're in, the harder it is to get them off. This is true with everything, including diapers.

    I've mentioned this before and had the occasional rebuttal along the lines of "tapes aren't that hard to rip off!" or "onesies aren't that hard to undo!" and for one thing, I have impaired general fine motor skills! I'm speaking from experience here! But more generally it's not only a matter of "can the thing physically be removed," but a matter of "can the thing be removed without pain?" and "can the thing be removed without damaging or destroying it?"

    If you're in a diaper you want to put back on, the viability of that project is going to be particularly dependent on how you undo it, even with hook and loop diapers: the diaper may technically be refastenable but most medical-grade diapers these days are like one-ply so if you rip too hard you'll strip the hooks off the wing.

    You can rip onesies open but I've found that if you apply too much force, even with onesies from well-regarded suppliers, instead of ripping the press stud off the other press stud and hence the flap off the flap, you rip the flap off the press stud (which remains closed) so you have to spend a couple extra seconds prying it open with your fingertips lest you ruin a onesie.

    You can rip waterproof pants down but even very good ones are generally tighter around the legs than underwear and have leg bands made out of materials with a higher coefficient of friction, meaning they will be physically harder to simply pull down and will hurt like billy-o if you try to do so. As with onesies, depending on the plastic pants, you also risk damaging or destroying them if you pull them with too much gusto, by way of the main shell of the pant simply separating from the waist or leg bands if you pull with too much force.

    There's also individual manual dexterity issues. I have never been au fait with cloth diaper pins or bib-and-brace overalls and while I was regularly using them I had a lot of help changing and dressing. If you're in that kind of situation, that's another wrinkle to consider.


    If your wardrobe is sized for your diapers then trying to go without the diapers can be an extremely harrowing experience. Basically anything with a waistband often ends up feeling like it's about to fall off, regardless of how tightly you fasten it (if that's an option).


    If you're in diapers overnight, and you have issues with waking up to pee overnight β€” which seem extraordinarily common among AB/DLs β€” then you have an incentive to use your diapers rather than get out of bed. However, this also means teaching yourself behaviours which can eventually enable bedwetting.


    Control is fundamentally a matter of intra-abdominal pressure (IAP). The muscles of control supply a counterpressure, which prevents voiding even in the presence of a certain IAP, or a certain pressure usually determined in part by IAP (like pressure inside the rectal ampulla). Pretty much everyone's IAP can be elevated to the point that they lose control regardless of their continence level, but most continent people don't experience circumstances that would do this on a daily basis.

    IAP is determined, in part, by mechanical compression of the abdomen. Diapers and waterproof pants have higher waistbands than the average underwear and press slightly harder, elevating IAP in precisely the region of the abdomen where this feeds into control. If you have normal continence this might just feel like being squished slightly. If your continence is poor enough that it can be compromised by laughing then the effects here can be more significant.


    Being in diapers increases the likelihood that other people will eventually become aware of them, which in turn increases the pressure to remain in them. This does not mean other people will keep you in diapers, nor is it something to be sought out. It is simply a fact of life. Conversely, there are virtually no situations in which someone except another AB/DL or maybe your partner is going to actively correct you if they catch you not wearing diapers. This does not mean that the expectation will not exist.

    Accidents of any kind β€” meaning voiding while intending not to, regardless of circumstances β€” agitate in favour of being in diapers. Generally, nobody, regardless of their circumstances or inclinations, wants to be in danger of accidents at potentially any time in their life. Accidents outside of diapers also increase the probability that a third party will make it their business (although that probability, both the beginning value and the increase, will vary wildly depending on the third party).

    Accidents while in diapers present less of an immediate external risk of shame, but are detrimental to control for other reasons. Namely, people often exercise control while in diapers to avoid diapering tasks that require a lot of effort. Failures of control force the person to carry out those tasks and become accustomed to them, and, usually, to find ways to do them faster and with less effort, thus reducing the person's incentive to maintain control. For instance, someone might avoid messing their diapers because messy diapers take a long time to change. Messing accidents, however, force them to figure out how to change faster, reducing their incentive not to mess their diapers in future.

    There's also the problem of diminishing returns, to which I will devote its own post.

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    September, 2023 Update


    Living life doing the same thing in and out has been blah. I dont want summer to end. But am excited for Halloween πŸ₯².

    Bedwetting: = Success!

    I did it. I'm just going to put a check fno


    I have to check my ass πŸ˜’. Lame, I can no longer trust a fart. I'm finding that if I have any rubble to my toots, I probably pooh a bit 🀏🏽 I haven't been eating the greatest foods. I went on that trip and was eating horrible 😩 then this month I've been being a fatty. Ehh y's bad food so good.


    Been everywhere doing everything thing I can enjoying what life hands me. I'm not rich by a long shot but I can still go places and see cool stuffs 😎. Think I'm stuck where I'm at until next year. Mehhhh! πŸ₯Ί but I'll be out soo enough