Is This On

umm soo this exists

Me in the adventures of...

Last update
2021-01-03 01:30:17


    I know most people associate LUSH Cosmetics with white girls and bath bombs but products from this beautiful company have faded my scars and stretch marks, completely gotten rid of my acne, fixed my dry skin problems, thickened my eyelashes, laid my edges, made my hair grow like crazy… I can go on and on. I’ve actually never tried the bath bombs, but their skincare and haircare products work magic.


    Fading Scars / Stretch Marks Organic Therapy Massage Bar

    Extra Dry SkinKing of Skin In-Shower Body Conditioner, Skin Drink Facial Moisturizer, Sultana of Soap Bar, Tender is the Night Massage Bar, Each’s a Peach Massage Bar

    Acne Fresh Farmacy Solid Cleanser, Eau Roma Toning Water, Full of Grace Serum Bar

    Thickening Lashes Eyes Right Mascara / Lash Milk

    Edges R&B Hair Moisturizer (if you put this on your edges before wrapping your hair, they’ll be relaxer-straight when you wake up, lasts about 12 hours), Dirty Styling Cream (cream-based edge control with a matte finish, no more shiny or crunchy edges) 

    Hair Growth NEW! Shampoo Bar, Retread Hair Conditioner


    I was asked to list the rest of the products I currently have in my possession, so here y’all go!


    Magical Moringa Facial MoisturizerOh my lordy. Let me tell y'all about this stuff. It’s marketed as a moisturizer but I use it as a primer because when you put this on your face, it’s completely matte. Like completely. All day. And it will lock your makeup in place like no other. You can sweat in it, swim in it, whatever. Shit won’t budge. Ever.

    Jason & the Argan Oil Shampoo BarAmazing for volumizing. It made the three bundles in my head look more like five when I used this thing the first time, I kid you not. Also gives your hair a really natural shine. I only use it when I really need a volume boost, otherwise it’s just too much.

    No Drought Dry ShampooIf you have a weave, you need this stuff. Period. A lot of times, the natural oils in our scalps (referring to my fellow black women here) are too heavy for Brazilian, Peruvian, etc hair, and so it’s easy for weave to get weighed down between washes. Shake this stuff in your hair, brush it out - bam, flow city.

    Honey Trap Lip BalmMy favorite lip balm, ever. Really improves the texture of your lips and seals in moisture. However, this is not for fixing chapped lips - use Ultrabalm for that first, and then this to prevent them from chapping again. Also, pro-tip, if you apply it before liquid lipstick, your lipstick won’t crease or dry out all day.


    Strawberry Feels ForeverSmells like fresh strawberries! Has a much thinner consistency than the other massage bars, so it can be used every day, like a solid lotion.

    Soft CoeurSmells like chocolate and honey, and is ridiculously moisturizing. More heavy-duty than the other bars, so I like to only use this one on spots like my knees, heels, and elbows.

    From Dusk til DawnThe shape of this one is amazing. It’s shaped like a cone, so it gives a deep massage when you’re using it. Definitely recommend if you have any sort of muscle pain.


    The Rough with the SmoothThis stuff smells soooo good. Like cotton candy. I use it before I shave because it really does an amazing job at removing any dead skin and it doesn’t leave a residue, so it won’t clog your razor. However, it’s a sugar scrub, so it melts super quickly.

    Ocean SaltThis is a heavy-duty scrub. Really amazing if you have dry, flaky skin, and the healing properties of the salt are really great if you have acne. It’ll dry it up and heal it super quick.

    Cup o’ Coffee Face & Body Mask I’m on my fourth jar of this already. The coffee beans are ground up just enough to give a deep, yet gentle scrub and the caffeine in the bar really does wake up your skin and make it look brighter. Great for the morning.

    BuffyIt smells like a vacation, that’s really the only way to describe it. It’s an exfoliant bar and body butter mixed together, so you rub it all over while you’re still in the shower, and then rinse the sand off. After, rub the oils in and pat dry. No need for lotion after because it seals in the moisture from your shower.


    Rose Jam Shower GelSmells like roses and has a really bubbly lather. More cleansing than moisturizing. I like to use it before a more moisturizing soap because it’s great for removing dirt and oil from the skin.

    The Olive Branch Shower GelA long-time favorite of mine. Great for dry skin, as it has a really creamy lather versus a bubbly one. Also, the smell is very calming and lingers for a long time.

    Needles & Pines Shower JellyIt’s a solid shower gel (consistency of jello), and it smells like Christmas trees! I like to store it in the fridge and use it when it’s hot outside, super cleansing and refreshing.


    Roses All the WayPersonal favorite! Smells like roses & vanilla ice cream. Super moisturizing and so, so creamy. Definitely buy if you suffer from dry skin.

    Yog NogVery moisturizing and the scent lingers for a really long time. Smells like snickerdoodles and eggnog.

    BohemianNot at all creamy, as it’s an exfoliating soap. It’s great to use on dark spots like knees and armpits because the exfoliants soften the skin and the lemon juice evens out your skintone. Smells like lemons.

    KarmaAnother favorite. It has a super thin consistency but is still very moisturizing, so it’s a good shaving soap because it won’t gunk up your razor. Smells like incense and patchouli.

    Figs & LeavesSmells like dirt and grass, in a good way. Super cleansing. As in your skin will literally squeak after using it, so I recommend using an in-shower moisturizer like King of Skin after using it.


    Atomic Toothy TabsSolid toothpaste that you crush up in your mouth. It sounds weird but these things are phenomenal. They really leave your teeth squeaky clean, and are the sole reason my teeth are so white - I don’t use any whitening products. This particular kind smells like cloves and cinnamon.

    Ultrabalm All Purpose BalmThis stuff is amazing. It’s an all-over balm for rough spots. I use it in the winter time on my hands and lips, because they get dry. I also use it year round on my face where I get dry spots, as it doesn’t clog pores.

    Silky Underwear Dusting PowderAnother holy grail. If you could turn cocoa butter into a powder, this would be it. It’s not drying like baby powder, it’s more silky (it’s also talc-free). I use it between my legs to prevent chafing and under my boobs when it’s hot outside to prevent sweating.


    THIIIIIIIIIS! I’ve always kinda enjoyed Lush for their bath-y stuff, but since my king @nanites started working there, and gives me the personal shopper treatment all the time, i rarely want to use anything else. For someone who has THE WORST skin (really dry, REEEEEEALLY sensitive, has rosacea, it’s just a bad time in general) they’ve been a god send! Celestial moisturizer, rosey cheeks face mask and fresh farmacy are my holy trinity. Nothing makes my skin feel softer than fresh farmacy it is some kind of witch craft. I am so excited for my birthday spa treatment with them.

    Plus ridiculously colourful and sparkly bath bombs are good for your soul, who gives a fuck if joyless dicks want to try and rain on your glitter parade?


    The massage bars named above (and the other ones available) are great for pre-bed body lotion in winter months! My skin only feels dry in the colder months, and using a massage bar on my body as a lotion works wonders. You wake up soft, moisturised and smelling great.


    it says shaggy has absolutely no ambitiom whatsoever. even ghe damned dog has some sort of life goal and he wants to eat dog treats for the rest of eternity. shaggy doesnt give a Fuckk. fun Scoobe-Doo™ trivia for the whole family: shaggy is a fucking nihilist


    Scooby Doo is middle aged.


    where the fuck were their parents??


    Shaggy’s name is fcking Norville


    This is how ppl die from insulin shock and alcohol poisoning at the same time


    if someone doesn’t make this for me and bring it to my bedroom door in the next hour ur all complicit in my depression


    if you drink 10 of these in 10 minutes at exactly midnight you will ascend to a higher plane and speak with both god and the devil then wake up in a waffle house parking lot at 4:20 am with only vague memories and a sense of loss


    peter retaliating against “baby monitor protocol” by changing the names of Tony’s Iron Man protocols

    “hey FRIDAY, zoom in on that building over there”

    “Old Man Bifocals protocol activated, Boss”

    “what the fuck did you just say to me”


    “FRIDAY alert the team that my thrusters are down and i can’t fly”

    “sure thing, activating I’ve Fallen and I Can’t Get Up Protocol”



    Tony: FRIDAY, open these encrypted files we don’t have a lot of time-

    FRIDAY: activating the Fr E Sh A Voca Do protocol





    -Peter gets hurt in a battle-

    FRIDAY: Bone Hurting Juice Protocol has been activated - Mr. Parker is in distress.

    Tony: -stops- He’s what?  The what?

    Peter: -over the com- Oof, ouch… my bones…


    Tony: FRIDAY! Engage autopilot!

    FRIDAY: Activating Jesus Take The Wheel protocol.

    Tony: Really, Pete?


    Tony: Where in the world is that kid??..FRIDAY!! Activate Peter’s GPS

    FRIDAY: Activating

    “ Helicopter parent protocol”

    Tony: *sighs*….why do I even bother


    Tony: FRIDAY divert all energy to thrusters

    FRIDAY: nyOOOOOooOOoM protocol activated


    i literally can’t breathe from this


    Tony, in front of team: FRIDAY activate the electric taze blast

    Friday: Activating ‘Wanna Be Thor’ protocol

    Thor: *triumphantly laughs*

    Tony,mumbling: Now the boys’ gone too far.