Literally me when I hurt people
oh god oh god oh god im so sorry is it here did i hurt you here oh god im so sorry friend
OMG AT THE END WHEN HE JUST SCOOPS THE CAT’S HEAD TO HIS CHEST. FUCK.
I don't even know how else to describe this except holy crap this is me when I go too far
Surrounded by people. Never felt so alone.
Welcome to my life, bitch. At least no one really cares if you’re functional or not. Me? Kind of makes a difference to whether society even considers me worth keeping alive.
Exactly. No one gives a fuck. Why would they? I’m a fucked up little piece of shit,
Every person is of value. The problem lies within our own perception
I wanted to try a fox tail plug, but someone told me it's basically a light form of bestiality?? Which I've never considered before. But I'm using it for camming and I'm reconsidering if that allegation is at all true. I know you're kink-positive, and I like to be open minded and never shame anyone for whatever their kinks are, but do you have an opinion on tails and ears during sex play being linked to bestiality at all? Cos I won't judge anyone else for it, but I would probably not do it if so
That is a ridiculous claim. There are ethics involving animal rights with buying a real fox tail, sure, but it is not even close to anything related to bestiality. It’s as much bestiality as wearing a fur coat is.
I kind of agree, but I'd say that this kind of thing, it's more perspective. A plug with a tail to one person is hardcore beastial while to the next guy it's nothing close. Now, unless you're so dressed up you can't tell the difference, I wouldn't automatically say it's connected
A sense of humor can make everything better. Sex isn’t like it is in the movies or in porn. There will be strange and weird and awkward sounds, there might be a silly interruption like the cat or a kid… you might knock heads or trip getting undressed. Sex is funny, foreplay is funny and sometimes you need to just laugh. It will keep things from getting awkward! If you take sex too seriously you aren’t truly enjoying it!
Not to mention a sense of humor can be really sexy no matter what your gender identity is!
this comic is literally my favorite thing on tumblr.
i’ve always said if you can’t laugh with the person you’re having sex with while you’re having sex with them you shouldn’t be having sex with them.
My husband once walked up behind me while i was sitting in the living room just watching t.v…and he put his penis on my shoulder and said “hello..”
THIS WAS HIS SEDUCTION.
THIS WAS HIS IDEA OF HOW TO GET ME INTO BED.
it worked, but not before I laughed for days.
For that last comment.
I always had a ton of weird funky condoms at my place because I volunteered with Planned Parenthood and did a lot of sex education and sex positive work. I literally had no less than like thirty different types of condoms at a time. So when it came time to grabbing a condom it was a grab bag of WHO KNOWS what you’ll end up with.
Long story short, my boyfriend grabs one, puts it on, heat of the moment type thing, a some point we both look down and see it’s an ELECTRIC GREEN condom. Dead pan he looks me straight in the eye and in his best impression goes “HEY HO. KERMIT DEE FROG HERE.” And I COMPLETELY LOST IT.
On a completely different occasion I said “don’t stop” and he sang ALL of Don’t Stop Believing. All of it. All of it. Right then and there. Without stopping.
Can I add the story about how me and one of my partners had a very enthralling discussion about deserts while I was on top of him?
Or the time my partner’s friends blasted “Eye of the Tiger” through the door and we rocked it out to the beat while quoting the movie?
I was with this girl during a trip out to Washington, we’d hung out a few times, and hit it off really well. So we got together one afternoon. Her dorm-mate came home, saw the “Do Not Disturb” sock on her bedroom door and called out “Thrusters to full!”
Not missing a beat the girl and I yelled back “We’re giving it all we’ve got, Captain!” and her roommate started fucking dying outside the door.
Probably should have proposed right on the spot, but whatever.
It got better.
I once dated a dude who bought a new thing of really good underwear, like designer level stuff, and he put a pair on one day, and we just went on with our day. I didn't know why, but all that day all of a sudden, he would get this really weird look on his face, and start kind of squirming randomly all day, and I was confused but watching. Finally we get to bed and he asks me "Hun, could you check if there's something wrong?" And gestures to his crotch. I crawl down there, and look, and right away I see a sticker stuck to his balls from his underwear! (don't know how he missed it in the shower.) I pull it off and take it off for him, and I look at it, and it says "approved by inspector thirty one." I immediately think "good, they passed" and almost fall off the bed I'm laughing so hard. It seriously took like ten minutes to calm down enough to explain why It looks like I'm laughing at his balls