What anxiety? I have CHEEKBONES!
Can't believe Peter Griffin really tried it.
Ok but I'd the second dude like...a vampire? Because my straight ass is bewitched.
(the first person has text over them that says "being fat and wanting a girlfriend")
First person: "See what's behind this door..!"
(Door has text over it that says "fat girls" while The Toccata and Fugue in D minor plays in the background)
First person: "Noo, is there a bett-"
Second person: " Yo it's funny that there's an entire demographic, of petite women who love bigger men. But because you've just ousted yourself, as a cunt, it's never gonna happen for you mate. You're really out here body shaming, all these beautiful shawties, big body Bugatti (kiss noise), exquisite; but you're built like a less cool Bling Bling Boy from Johnny Test. Make it make sense mate. It doesn't- it really doesn't. Could've kept your mouth shut. But you had to say something. And you even went so far as to put it on the internet. And you thought that was a good idea because-? Please, take yourself elsewhere. Sincerely the entire fucking human race."
The moment that man started speaking -
Okay but he DOES actually sound very suspiciously like Trevor or Alucard from Castlevania
Sir speaks in cursive
His voice alone has seduced me
Second dude does make a good point though
no...the gender envy...it’s too strong...
my mom actually got me my gf cause she came up to her and started gushing about me and showed her a picture and was like 'shes always whining about not having a girlfriend:/ and i always say honey one day the right girl will come!! heres her numer, can you tell her im right??' and later that day the girl texted me 'are you really such a whiny bottom that even your mom knows' and we hooked up and got together afterwards so thanks mom youre the best
i’m screaming every single part of this is wild and it just keeps getting better