sindri42A few highlights:
“ I got pulled over more in the first two years after my transition than I did the entire 20 years I was driving before that. Before, when I’d been stopped, even for real violations like driving 100 miles an hour, I got off. “
“ A couple of years after my transition, I had a grad student I’d been mentoring. She started coming on to me, stalking me, sending me emails and texts. My adviser and the dean — both women — laughed it off. It went on for the better part of a year, and that was the year that I was going up for tenure. It was a very scary time. I felt very worried that if the student felt I was not returning her attentions she would claim that I had assaulted her. I felt like as a guy, I was not taken seriously. I had experienced harassment as a female person at another university and they had reacted immediately, sending a police escort with me to and from campus. “
“ I am hyper-aware of making sudden or abrupt movements, especially in airports, train stations and other public places. “
“Prior to my transition, I was an outspoken radical feminist. I spoke up often, loudly and with confidence. I was encouraged to speak up. I was given awards for my efforts, literally — it was like, “Oh, yeah, speak up, speak out.” When I speak up now, I am often given the direct or indirect message that I am “mansplaining,” “taking up too much space” or “asserting my white male heterosexual privilege.” “
“ My ability to empathize has grown exponentially, because I now factor men into my thinking and feeling about situations. Prior to my transition, I rarely considered how men experienced life or what they thought, wanted or liked about their lives. “
“ I do notice that some women do expect me to acquiesce or concede to them more now: Let them speak first, let them board the bus first, let them sit down first, and so on… As a former lesbian feminist, I was put off by the way that some women want to be treated by me, now that I am a man, because it violates a foundational belief I carry, which is that women are fully capable human beings who do not need men to acquiesce or concede to them. “
“ What continues to strike me is the significant reduction in friendliness and kindness now extended to me in public spaces. It now feels as though I am on my own: No one, outside of family and close friends, is paying any attention to my well-being. “
“ Apparently, people were only holding the door for me because I was a woman rather than out of common courtesy as I had assumed. Not just men, women too. I learned this the first time I left the house presenting as male, when a woman entered a department store in front of me and just let the door swing shut behind her. I was so caught off guard I walked into it face first. “
“ People now assume I have logic, advice and seniority. They look at me and assume I know the answer, even when I don’t. “
feminists-against-feminism“My ability to empathize has grown exponentially, because I now factor men into my thinking”
imagine actually caring about or thinking about the reality the other gender without having to actually live life in their shoes.
We see all this identarian “representation matters” shit, with people saying “oh finally, a character who looks like me”. I have never watched a movie where, if I didn’t identify with the character’s spirit, I didn’t identify with the character. Korra, Jinora, Bolin, Iroh, Aang, Sakka, Zuko, do they all look alike? Well I identified with all of them either way. Maybe because I’m not a racist or sexist who saw their skin color, probable genitals, or shapes as a reason to close my mind to their character, symbology, individuality, and any commonality between them and myself. Consciousness, or fictional characters canonically with consciousness, have something innately in common with you. And if someone is kind, and you’re kind, or of someone is malicious and you’re malicious, what the fuck does their skin tone or tits or dick have to do with that commonality? Really
goatyellsateverything@hotpocket-fucker
Her name was Norah Vincent and her book was Self Made Man. She had a short stint in a mental health facility right after the 18 months she spent as a man because the realities men face gave her depression so badly she wanted to die.
She came away from the experience with a new view on men. She said it wasn’t men who have privilege in this world, its women.
I’d also recommend The Red Pill by Casey Jaye. A feminist that went into her film project expecting to show just how awful MRAs were and how easy men had it. She came away renouncing modern feminism and with more than a few friends in the movement.
Both of these women were sent hate simply for saying men have problems that are just as important as womens.
goatyellsateverythingErin Pizzey. She opened the first DV shelter for women in Europe but when she said men could also be the victims of DV she was shunned. Then when she said that most DV is reciprocal (both parties contributed almost equally) she was threatened and more or less run out of the continent. She came to the states and settled down but the hate followed her and thats when her dog was killed.
She still speaks about mens issues and fights for actual equal rights and she still gets threats on her life for her work. She continues to push forward, though, because she said its the right thing to do.
I’d also recommend Honey Badger Radio. They are full on MRAs and sometimes they can get a bit radicle in the opposite direction of feminism (especially Karen. she…uh…she can get intense), but they still have a lot of good they do and a lot of great resources.