@randomhatthief
Ghost of Mild Inconvenience

iwi Krista | 24 | 18+ Content
Be safe kids

Posts
87344
Last update
2020-07-10 18:09:10

    <>FIRE NATION SCHOOL MEMES FIRE NATION SCHOOL MEMES! WHAT WOULD THEY BE ABOUT? NO CLUE

    It’s against the law to take down portraits of the Fire Lord without a special ceremony, but no law on where to put it up. You also are required to bow to the portrait as you pass it.

    Some boys got a hold a a dozen different copies and plastered some in the bathroom stalls which got taken down within the week (to the annoyance of the staff. those ceremonies are long).

     One hangs in the farthest corner of a gym, impossibly high, and no one can find who put it there and it’s impossible to take down. 

    It was Aang

    I feel like I need to tell everyone how brilliantly the Globe incorporated a deaf Gildenstern into the 2018 Hamlet and then force all of you to watch it

    ok, so Gildenstern is played by a deaf actor, Nadia Nadarajah. he* signs all his lines, and either Rosencratz interprets for him, or the person he’s talking to says something that makes it obvious what he just said, depending. how each character reacts to Gildenstern is completely in-character and often hilarious

  • Claudius and Gertrude are intensely awkward around Gildenstern. they obviously don’t know BSL so they just gesture emphatically but aimlessly when they talk.
  • Hamlet, who of course is friends with R&G, *does* know BSL. he starts off by signing fluently whenever he’s talking to them but, as his distrust of them grows, he signs less and less until he’s only signing the equivalent of “fuck off” whenever he talks
  • Polonius just shouts really loud whenever he tries to talk to Gildenstern
  • it’s all brilliant and adds another layer of humor and pathos and you should all watch it

    *casting at the Globe right now is gender neutral so I’m just going to use the character’s pronouns

    guys I know I’m wittering on about this but the thing I want to emphasize is that there is no tokenism here. they didn’t just shove a deaf actor into a speaking role so they could pat themselves on the back about how progressive they are. they went to the effort of fully integrating Nadarajah’s deafness into the story so that it not only fit organically within the narrative but actually enhanced it. watching Hamlet’s signing disintegrate as his trust in R&G disintegrates adds a depth to that storyline I’ve never seen before. Claudius has exactly the awkwardness of someone who thinks of himself as a good person and therefore thinks he’s being kind and generous with his accommodations for disability, but has never even once actually asked a disabled person what they need, which is so on-point for his character it hurts.

    I know Michelle Terry gets a lot of hate mail for her policy of race-, gender-, and disability-blind casting, but fuck all those people. long may that policy continue.

    Y’all.... this is not good.. #freebritney

    For anyone wondering what’s happening: For 12 years, Britney Spears has been under a conservatorship wherein her father and a lawyer have been granted full legal authority over her life and assets. The status is arranged for individuals deemed unable to feed and clothe themselves, and was implemented in Ms. Spears’s case after a mental health crisis in 2008.

    The situation has returned to the spotlight because the conservatorship was recently extended, and because Kanye West’s presidential campaign announcement has brought the situation into contrast with his mental health history, as West was institutionalized over psychological issues in 2016.

    Many argue that the conservatorship is abusive and unnecessary, as Spears has demonstrated full mental faculty in the decade since her guardians were appointed, and see a double standard between her continued conservatee status, 12 years after her mental health episodes, and West’s presidential bid after just 4.

    Outraged Casey Anthony: “Hey, I was meant to be the worst Florida mom ever!”

    From Newsweek:

    Florida medical examiner’s report has raised questions about a 17-year-old Fort Myers resident’s death from COVID-19 complications last month. The teenag<>er, Carsyn Davis, was a cancer survivor with a rare, ongoing autoimmune disorder. She died of respiratory failure after contracting the new coronavirus in early June.

    The medical examiner’s report notes that Davis attended a 100-person church event, where people were not required to wear face masks, roughly two weeks before she died in a Miami-Dade County hospital. During the nine days that followed, she was given antibiotics, hydroxychloroquine and oxygen via her grandfather’s portable machine by her parents while at ho<>me. Her mother, Carole Brunton Davis, is a nurse. The hospital recommended intubation when Davis was admitted to its pediatric unit on June 19, but her parents declined the procedure, according to the county medical examiner. She received plasma therapy and was eventually intubated on June 22, but died one day later.

    this is murder.

    This is murder.

    Imagine surviving cancer to have your absolute monster of a mother purposely expose you to a virus that could kill you given your compromised immunity are you fucking serious

    Pedophilia is bad should not be a radical statement.

    No really, please reblog this if you can, because this site in general, but fandom spaces especially bad for this, to the point where people are genuinely afraid of harassment they may face for saying ‘Pedophilia is a bad thing and you probably should not encourage it’ or for calling it what it is. Fandom spaces are also especially bad for screaming about how it’s ‘just fiction’ when we know damn <>well that fiction impacts reality.

    In case anyone feels like continuing to argue this post, I have multiple real actual pedophiles telling me to ‘deal with’ their attraction to children and being allowed to produce content with it for said children to read so like, this is a serious problem.

    I mean you can find them in the notes. Real pedo’s are comfortable in fandom spaces because they know y’all will defend them now with ‘but that’s just fictional, they would never do it in real life!!’

    @ anyone who excuses pedophilia in any way: Get the fuck off my blog, you’re disgusting and you’re not welcome here.

    When I was a kid, my mom was a judge and my dad was starting his solo practice, and they both worked full time. There were four of us kids between the ages of one and seven (the Just Us League) and no decent daycares nearby, so they hired a nanny.  She had three almost-adult children, and on days when she couldn’t work, one of her kids would substitute. The oldest kid was named Bob, age 18, and he had just finished army basic training when this all went down. Bob did not have the good sense god gave a rock. 

    I have an older brother, Jake, who was seven; then me, Hellen, age five, then Seth, age three, and my little sister Gin would have been one. It was late August, and we were at our nanny’s house, though she was gone for the day. Bob was in charge.

    Bob should probably not have been in charge.

    Bob tried keeping us entertained with board games and tag and movies. Gin took a nap. Eventually he decided to get creative, and sat us down in the living room with a game and vanished into the garage. There was a smashing sound. And then some saw noises. And then some hammering. And then we saw him going around the house to the back yard through the windows, though we were too short to see what he was doing. And finally, he yelled to us to come out into the driveway. 

    Jake and Seth and I trooped out. Bob had both hands behind his back. He stepped up to Jake and revealed what he had in his right hand. 

    It was a wooden sword. It was clearly made from what appeared to be parts of a chair’s legs, cut down and nailed together. He presented this, and announced, “You are Sir Jake, the strongest knight!” 

    He stepped up to Seth and presented what was in his left hand. It was another wooden sword, smaller than the first, also crudely made out of chair legs. He announced, “You are Sir Seth, the bravest knight!”

    At this point, I was practically vibrating in place, waiting eagerly for my sword so I could use it to whale on my brothers, as god intended me to do. I was therefore understandably disappointed to be presented with the business end of a garden hose and told, “You are Miss Hellen, the Water Fairy!”

    “No,” I said. “I want a sword.”

    Bob was confused. “But you get water magic! Magic’s great!”

    “No.” I repeated, holding the hose. It had a spray nozzle set to jet. “I want a sword.”

    “Magic’s great. Magic’s better than a sword.” Bob insisted. “You’ll see. Wait here a moment.”

    And then Bob ran around the side of house and vanished. 

    We stood in the driveway. Jake and Seth poked each other with their swords. I spritzed them idly with the hose, trying to decide which of them would be easier to steal a sword from. 

    And then we heard a quiet wooshing noise, and smelled smoke. 

    We turned. As we watched, a line of fire rushed around the corner of the house, consuming a path of gasoline poured into the dry August grass. 

    We paused and considered this for a few moments. I raised the hose and sprayed a jet of water at the fire. It went out. We glanced at each other. Then we took off running, following the trail of fire, spraying as we went. 

    The fire led in a path around the house to the back yard. As we turned the corner, we saw Bob, clad in a bathrobe and holding a curtain rod, standing in the center of a large ring of burning grass. He cackled manically. “I am the FIRE WIZARD! Your puny swords are useless! Nothing but water magic can defeat me!”

    I promptly blasted him with the hose. He spluttered. The fire did not go out. 

    I turned the hose on the fire itself, spraying a section close to us so that it would extinguish. As soon as there was enough room, Jake charged forward, brandishing his chair leg sword with a battle cry. Seth, always happy to be included, followed. They ran into the circle and began beating Bob around the kneecaps with their swords. I kept spraying. 

    Eventually, Bob the Fire Wizard was brought down and all the fire was extinguished. Seth and Jake continued to work on bruising Bob’s shins, and I quickly discarded the hose to lend my fists and extremely pointy elbows to the cause. Bob lay in the smoldering grass, probably regretting using such sturdy chair legs. 

    Once we’d all tired ourselves out and lay panting in a heap, Bob decided it was time for the moral of the story. “You see, a sword is nothing compared to the power of a little girl with **magic**.” 

    We thought about this for a few moments. Bob nodded wisely. Jake and Seth nodded back. 

    “I still want a sword.” I said. 

    there’s a lot of people in the tags and replies expressing several concerns, which I will address:

  • “Where was Gin?” She was sleeping in a crib on the sunporch. We did this a lot–played outside while she napped–because we could hear her if she woke up and started crying, but were less likely to wake her up. She slept through the whole thing and was totally fine.
  • “You can’t put out a gasoline fire with water.” At the time, my little kid brain assumed that any flammable liquid was gas, but in retrospect it could have been almost anything. It very well may have been something other than gasoline. All I know is I could extinguish it with a garden hose.
  • “What did your parents say?” A lot of swear words at a very high volume.
  • “Did you get a sword?” Yes. Lots.  Here are a couple of them, and also my pet ringneck dove, Arson. You can see how this all may have had some lasting effect on me.
  • image

    Is that a real bird?? :0

    Yes, she’s real. This is Arson, her mate, Larceny, and their idiot children, Forgery and Fraud.

    image

    Arson lives her life constantly wishing she had opposable thumbs so she could light fires.

    image
    albarnesauthor

    What a ride

    The absolute mania of naming your pets after felonies.

    thrilled to report that that was also me

     Hey btw, another worldbuilding thing: You can, and actually should have weird and impractical cultural things. They’re not inherently unrealistic, for as long as you address the realistic consequences as well.

     Let’s say you’ve got a city where there’s tame white doves everywhere. They’re not pests, they’re regarded as sacred, holy protectors of the city, and the whole city cares for them and feeds them like they’re pets. They’re so tame because it’s a social taboo to hurt or scare one. Nice pretty doves :)

     Then someone points out that even if they’re not seen as pests, doesn’t having a completely unchecked feral pigeon population - that not only isn’t being culled, but actively fed and cared for - mean that there would be bird shit absolutely all over the place?

     A part of you wants to say no, because these are your nice, pretty doves. To explain that there’s a reason why theyre not shitting all over the place, maybe they’re super-intelligent and specifically bred and trained to not shit all over the place. The logistics of how, exactly, could anyone breed and train a flock of feral birds go unaddressed.

     An even worse solution would be to not have those birds, editing them out of the world. No, they spark joy, you can’t just toss them out!

     Now, consider: Yes, yes they would, but the city also has an extensive public sanitation service that’s occupied 90% of the time by cleaning bird shit off of everything. One of the most common last names in the area actually translates to “one who scrapes off dove shit”, and it’s a highly respected occupation. And thanks to the sheer necessity of constantly regularly cleaning everything, the city enjoys a much higher standard of cleanliness, and less public health issues caused by poor public sanitation.

     The doves do protect the city. By shitting fucking everywhere.

    If your weird and impractical cultural thing is a thing that can happen in the real world - i.e., massive sacred dove population rather than weird taboos about a specific kind of magic or something - it’s also a good idea to look into how real communities handle similar traditions, and double-check your assumptions about why these elements would be massively inconvenient in the first place.

    In the dove example: you would still need dedicated sanitation workers, but the kind of messy, runny, destructively acidic droppings you probably associate with feral pigeons are a sign of very poor health in the birds. A healthy, well-fed population would produce guano that would be much easier to clean up and also an excellent fertilizer.

    The sacred doves not only protect the city by necessitating keeping it clean, they also support local agriculture and so help guard the city against famine.