
hey. do cry. I went to Wanting To Fuck You island and there were no bitches
why were you on wanting to fuck me island? 🤨📸
hey. do cry. I went to Wanting To Fuck You island and there were no bitches
why were you on wanting to fuck me island? 🤨📸
your bed is probably as happy to see you as you are to see it. ‘here comes the warmth slab’ it thinks
wrong it thinks “god hope this dipshit doesnt spill beans all over me again who tf eats beans in bed”
stop reblogging this new year new me i havent spilled beans in bed ONCE this year
uh oh
It gets funnier the earlier in the year you reblog it
I am at my heart a hypocrite because I'll talk long and hard about the importance of platonic relationships in fiction and how they're just as important and powerful as romantic ones and then the instant two characters show undying loyalty for each other I'm like"👀👀👀👀 what if they kissed?"
i feel like tumblr doesnt know about the pain and suffering that is english tap water,,,, girl there are stalagmites inside me
Lmao op lives in the south. The tap water up here is from fucking springs. It's so clean and fresh and has no stalagmites whatsoever. Cope and seethe southerner
My bones are so strong from all the chalk I've been drinking that I could mull you into a fine paste
You guys are like a two hour drive from each other
The sound of heavy rain while you are in bed.
I am consuming a media and you are going to hear about it
and the thrilling sequel: i consumed a media months ago and you are still hearing about it
and the cautionary conclusion: the media has consumed me
Do I actually want to write this fanfic or do I just want to wallow in the delicious daydream like a pig in the mud?
Foiled!
Today I got to go on one of our runs to more rural shelters to help relieve overcrowding there. We ended up bringing back 21 kittens and 10 dogs. So fun day. But this morning, while I was getting stuff together in preparation for the 90 minute drive…. This happened.
Excuse you Tiniest Opossum, but you are NOT allowed to escape through the front bars of the cat carrier we were housing you in. I’m going to put you back.
“NO!”
I am going to catch you and put you back and you have no say in this matter.
“NO!”
Catching you and putting you back now.
“NOOOOOO!”
Aaaand back you go. Let go of the purple towel and go in the cardboard box.
“Noooooooooooo!”
I admit, I am in love with this tiny possum. Finding it in the hallway like that nearly caused me to die from adorableness and ridiculousness. I mean… it’s half the size of an adult syrian hamster and growling so fiercely that it was vibrating.
This was straight up the best thing I could possibly wakeup to.
Yes!
I got rid of the NEW bubble by the tumblrmart. It was causing me anxiety.
AdblockPlus > Block Element > Click on NEW bubble > Gone
haters mad because they paid $100k for a fast car while it cost me nothing but time and patience to tame and form a bond with an enormous winged beast that loves me
it doesn't matter. you'll NEVER have a murder of crows circling ominously over you while you wear a slutty black outfit. idiot.
we have a guy like this in glasgow, Scotland, he’s called crow guy and the murder of crows follows him everywhere, here he is sitting down, I don’t know if the dog is his I think they just like sitting there with him
everyone wants what he has
Got so used to blocking every new follower I almost blocked a real human
🤖🤖🤖🤖🤖🤖🤖🤖🤖😳🤖🤖🤖🤖🤖
There are so many shows out there that would have made much better miniseries.
When I tell people to delete anon hate, to not publish it, it’s not me saying “ignore it and it’ll stop; don’t fight back.” It is 100% petty and spiteful. Honestly, I can’t think of anything better than the person who sent the hate obsessively checking your blog and refreshing and refreshing, waiting for you to reply, and getting increasingly frustrated when the ask they so masterfully crafted never pops up & you just keep posting cute pictures of your pets and talking about how nice your day was.
THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS!!!
Deleting anon hate without any explanation or reply means to give haters the exact importance they have: none.
fucking constant reboot remake reboot remake reboot remake reboot remake!!!!!!!!!! the tv has only been around for like a century you literally cannot be out of ideas already
Found family is currently a very emphasized (and entirely valid!) trope, but something I’d like to also see more of is what I’m tentatively calling recovered family. Coming to better appreciate and see the value in the family that you do have, a family coming back together and working to rebuild those fractured relationships, that sort of thing.
tumblr added another secret feature. if you make a post and just type "gullible", it turns it into a different message. tell me which one you got!
gullible!!
this is so fucked up how could you do this to me op
no no you just have to do the word by itself without any punctuation!
gullible
NOT ONCE BUT TWICE I AM BETRAYED IM LIKE IF CEASER WAS A LESBIAN
one of my favourite tropes is cocky assholes catching feelings first
The 5 love languages of monster fucker:
i love when large dogs are picked up and they’re so absolutely confused as to how this could happen that they just sorta