Thanks for the prompt @alltheselovelywords 😊❤️😘

(Bucky/Nat, rated G, 100 wds)

Drabble #3

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Rachmaninoff.

Bucky recognized the music-- piano, cello, violin-- as soon as he walked in; knew what it meant.

She was sitting there in the half-dark, face toward the window, a glass of amber liquid loose in her hand.

He set his bag down, moving slowly.

The set of her shoulders said it all: she knew he was there; nothing more required.

...

He was still awake when she slid into the sheets; lifted his arm until she settled, cheek to his chest.

She didn't say it aloud; didn't need to.

His kiss, to her brow, was his quiet reply: "Always."

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Rachmaninoff: Trio élégiaque in D minor, Op.9

Thanks @ibelieveinturtles for the prompt. 😊

This is my first-ever drabble; it's tough to tell a story in 100 words!

(Nobody mentioned by name, but I had Bucky/Darcy in mind for this. Rated G.)

Drabble #1

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After three days of false alarms-- "How you holding up?"... "Any news?"-- he was slow to pick up. Knew it wouldn't be her, telling him there'd been a mistake: that she hadn't been there at all.

A woman's voice: tinny, unfamiliar.

"I'm calling about the photo?"

The selfie. He'd made copies; peppered the street with her smile.

"We got a Jane Doe..."

...

It was like stepping into the light when he rounded the curtain; saw her lying there like an angel who'd gone a few rounds in the ring.

His voice broke, in the quiet of the room:

"Hi, sweetheart."

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Do you ever go back and look at your Ao3 History? If you haven't, you ought to. It's interesting, lol... especially if you're like me and your memory is like swiss cheese and what you find comes as a bit of a surprise.

I do remember that I started out on Ao3 reading a lot of Loki fics. A LOT. All kinds of pairings, too; everyone was up for grabs: Marvel characters, OCs, other figures from Norse mythology... before finally settling into Tasertricks for a while. I was so interested in that character (the MCU version, because of what Hiddleston brought to the role), and for a while I couldn't get enough.

Every now and then I'd take a break from Loki to read some Shieldshock, apparently, which I don't remember at ALL. I thought my forays into Shieldshock came later, branching off from Wintershock... but I think, now that I'm remembering, it was more of a Steve thing... reading Loki/Steve (I don't even remember the name of that ship) and going from there. But I kept going back to Darcy.

(BTW, if any of my Wintershock readers are like "oh no she's moved onto BuckyNat now and I don't like BuckyNat", you should know that I still have several Wintershock WIPs on the backburner that I intend to finish at some point. I've just been re-reading a shit-ton of comics during this latest prolonged depression, so my head has been in my comic ships instead of my MCU ones. I'm also still planning to re-post edited versions of some of my deleted fics; I just keep going back-and-forth on which ones.)

Anyway... according to my history, the first Wintershock story I read was The Last Confession of Darcy Lewis, by @leftennant

Maybe what drew me to it were the tags, which still make me lol:

I must have been hooked, because my history definitely goes into a Wintershock deepdive after that. So I have @leftennant, and that fic to thank/blame for that. 🙏

Both my last published ficlet and my current WIP feature Comics!Bucky, whom I ship with Nat (and only Nat). 

In spite of my fierce devotion to Comics!BuckyNat, I don’t ship them in the MCU; not really sure why. Maybe because the MCU changed Bucky’s backstory so much that his entire complicated relationship with Nat was erased, which robbed the MCU characters of the delicious (but frustrating, because Marvel won’t let anyone be happy for long) chemistry, reunions, pining, and soulmate-level love that the comics characters share.  

If you’ve read my Wintershock, it’s pretty obvious that he’s MCU Bucky there: he and Steve grew up together in Brooklyn; he was made into the WS by Hydra; he looks like Sebastian Stan (blue eyes instead of brown, etc); and his history with Nat is minimal. She shows up in my Wintershock stories, but she and Bucky are either friends/colleagues without a history, or I hint at a history that is long, LONG over. I think for my own sanity I have to keep those two worlds (MCU vs Comics) firmly separate in my writing, because I adore their chemistry in the comics so much that shipping him with anyone else in a world where their comics history existed would just feel wrong.

If you haven’t read the comics then there are some important differences which you should know about, if you plan to read any of my BuckyNat:

There’s other stuff, too, but those are probably the most important. The fact that he’s not a super-soldier presents some challenges for me, as I’m used to writing him as someone who’s essentially invincible. I mean... comics being what they are, and Bucky being who he is, he routinely does stupid, certain-death things and somehow survives every time, but it’s a bit tough when I’m the one writing and playing devil’s advocate with myself about the plausibility of the situations he gets himself into.

The suggestion for “Motivation Monday”, originally, was to “tag your favorite fandom participants and let them know how they motivate you to do what you do.”  

It would be hard for me, off the top of my head, to list all the writers, artists, and readers, who either inspire me to put my own stuff out there, or to keep doing what I’m doing because I am reassured, through their kind words, that I’m not screaming into a void. I have had some unbelievably lovely comments on my stories that have made me cry, humbled me, made me feel proud, not alone, happy to be a human being and still here making things... I could go on. 

I haven’t always been the kindest person to my readers; I can be very closed-off and awkward, too defensive when criticized (depending on my mood), and just downright shitty (deleting most of my library without warning). But even if I’m not always the greatest at expressing it, it means EVERYTHING to me and makes it all worth it, if I feel like I have brightened even one person’s day (or just made them FEEL something, other than whatever shitty stuff was going on in their own head, and needed a distraction from, on their lunch break.)

One of my very favorite things about posting on Ao3, especially after a hiatus, is seeing people in the comments with whom I may not have ever interacted directly outside of Ao3, but who nevertheless feel like old friends, because I know their username, or their profile picture, or what-have-you, and it just feels so, so good to see that they’re still there, still enjoying fanworks, still being the wonderfully fun, or clever, or witty, or kind, or shy, or lurking, or whatever, people they are. I just love it so much. 

I would love to tag some specific people-- not sure I feel comfortable with that, though. I don’t want to make anyone squirm.  And lists lead to unintended omissions, and I hate that. 

To my readers and cheerleaders, please do know that I SEE you, and I appreciate you so, so much, and you have helped me more than you know. Thank you ❤️❤️