Supporting my Gorgeous...

Understanding, listening, acknowledging, learning and doing anything I can to help my amazing woman @sober-in-seattle

Last update
2016-06-10 00:07:15

    Daily positives

    💖got goodbye kisses from my future step children 💖goodbye kisses from future hubby 💖completed homework 💖made bed 💖did some laundry 💖completed pet chores 💖thankful for Jeffrey cleaning up kitchen 💖drinking water 💖completed meditation 💖feeling better and more relaxed 💖Jeffrey comforting me when I get down on myself 💖learning to relax


    Seeing you happy is my favorite thing


    My Eyes Are Open

    Talking with my sister on the phone today gave me a horrifying look at myself when I use to drink. Unfortunately I called her when she was out and about drinking with people. Some dude answered her phone which instantly irritated me and then the conversation went into a spiral after that. I called her to figure out what was going on for Mother’s day and she spoke to me in this tone that irritated me. It was an arrogant tone. A tone she doesn’t usually use with me when I call her. It was a sharp tone that pissed me off and I thought to myself wow this is what I looked like. Just totally outside myself not my authentic self. I could clearly tell my sister was drinking because I wasn’t talking to my sister. I understand what Jeffrey meant when he said he loved the real me. Feeling what I felt tonight I thought to myself….wow I’m surprised Jeff put up with some of the crap I put him through and I’m surprised he stayed with me. We both put each other through a lot when I was battling the trials of figuring out whether I wanted to drink anymore or not and I can proudly say I’m still happy and thankful I choose not to drink. I also think to myself wow…this guy must really love me if he wants the real me. I’m thankful I am sober. 


    No matter how angry we would get, I could never walk away or give up the chance at having the real you. @sober-in-seattle is what I've always wanted in my life, your my perfect, I love you.

    Alcohol addiction causes damage to the prefrontal cortex of the brain, which is where willpower resides. The only way out of this is through detox, nutrition and recovery to allow the prefrontal cortex to heal and the reward center to re-build the dopamine receptors. Meditation is one of the most powerful ways to aid in recovery and heal the impairment of the prefrontal cortex. Meditation must be a continued and consistent practice as one of the spokes of the healing journey. Meditation is actually the 11th step of the 12-step program.

    Paula Owens (via rhamador1979)

    Jeffrey I think you’re right when you suggested I start meditating again

    (via sober-in-seattle)

    I just know you were more at peace and could relax when you were doing it regularly. I care about you and want you to be at peace. I love you so much @sober-in-seattle


    10 Small Gestures Scientifically Proven To Strengthen Your Relationship

    Loved this article. Very true!!! The smallest gestures really do mean the most. 



    I had a dream last night that I had a baby. I was so deeply excited to have her. The act of giving birth to her didn’t take place I just knew she was mine and she was a part of me. No one was around and it was just her and I and I was so happy and didn’t even wonder where anyone else was. I have had dreams in the past of children like my boyfriends or random children but none like this. When I woke up I had to call my grandmother on the phone to share with her this dream I had. I found I was much more emotional than I thought when I was describing the dream to her. She asked, “Are you crying?” I couldn’t help but get all choked up and fight back tears. I said, “Yes but I’m trying not to cry because I don’t want my mascara to run haha.” She says my maternal instincts are showing themselves and the deep part of me knows I am meant to be a mother. The other part of me knows I need to finish school and get my career on track so I can provide. This dream expanded my awareness within myself and it was also very painful. I yearn to have children of my own and part of me wants that right now if I had the funds and the other part of me wants to experience more travel to certain places and enjoy my freedom. Its such a weird spot to be in. I have a longing for two worlds. The maternal world has been calling me but I know its not time yet. Life will speak to me and I will find my way. I’m just so very torn because I can sense the amount of joy I would feel having children of my own but I want to be able to give them a good life and I don’t want to have to struggle to provide. So I need to do what I need to do so I can create the life I want to live. Life is talking and I am listening to what is being communicated. I love being sober.


    And why do I have to read and find out about this on here ;-)


    This was refreshing to read! Relationships can be really tough but worth all the struggle. There is no perfect relationship or perfect person and I love how Dr.Phil breaks it all down. Enjoy!

    @supportingher   <—Love him <3


    Socializing and the Drinking Demons

    I always feel a sense of uneasiness when it comes to certain social events. This uneasiness stems from knowing that I cannot allow myself to drink. It’s frustrating that I feel I can’t function socially without it. It’s frustrating that I feel that I can’t enjoy the company of others without alcohol running through my veins. It’s frustrating that with specific social events that drinking always is in the back of my mind. Will this ever leave my thoughts? Will I ever be able to enjoy the company of others without being approached by the thought of drinking? As a child I freely enjoyed life as it was without any substance to lean on and realizing this breaks my heart because I just want to feel that freedom again. Will I ever get this back? I have faith that life will show me the answers I just have to learn to quiet the mind and be patient.  


    I know exactly how you feel. I’m the same. I used to get blind drunk to overcome my social anxiety and low self-esteem. If it wasn’t alcohol, it was Crystal Meth. Unfortunately when you were a child, you didn’t know what getting drunk was like so that’s why you had that freedom but I’m afraid you can’t get that back. It sucks I know but social events are always going to be a tough one. Especially where there is alcohol involved. Stay strong.


    This dude just posts all about him currently "slamming" and all this drug shit yet says Suboxone helped and ask for advise because he's clean...... Fuck off. @sober-in-seattle