@tanyatakaishi
over a decade later

A blog mostly dedicated to Digimon (a fandom I've been in much too long and will probably never leave). Also features updates on my fanfic, possibly some original writing and inspiration for writing in general.

Posts
2213
Last update
2020-06-20 04:27:05
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    this is too much pressure

    title???? a TITLE????? is it not enough that i wrote the damn thing IS THAT NOT ENOUGH WORDS WRUNG FROM MY VERY FLESH AND BLOOD

    the song lyrics have abandoned me, no number of parantheses and lower cased words can save me from this hell

    “I wring out my flesh for what is inside it, pouring out everything I have written, because what has been has has already been repeated: what has been said has been said.”

    (Source: The Lamentations of a Middle Egyptian Scribe, c. 19th century BCE.)

    really rude of you to just expose my past life like that

    A teaser for the next chapter of my MLB fic, Evergreen. Superheroes lost alone in the woods with no cheese. Cuddling, words, wine, eventually an akuma, a reveal & so, so many tree puns. So many.

    Find the story here.

    Why did loving Chat Noir mean the end of the world? 

    She had almost kissed him. With his stupid cat eared hoodie and his stupid green eyes and his stupid sweet smile and his stupid model hair. And all his stupid words. When she had looked at him then in her tipsy haze, heart bursting from all the moments that had led them there, from a trust and love that went far beyond romance… she wanted to. 

    She wanted to forget Chat Blanc and her responsibilities and know the boy beneath the mask, the incorrigible flirt who made dumb puns and arranged candles on rooftops for her. 

    Was that what made her lean in, tracing the outline of the mask behind his ear? 

    Or was it how, without the magic, she swore she saw Adrien under his hood?

    Her eyelids burned, pricking heat building in the corners.

    Was she really that desperate for a love she couldn’t attain? Why couldn’t she just let Adrien go? Why did it hurt so much to know she should?

    How could she use her kitty like that?

    Why didn’t he let her?

    Her heart slammed into her sternum. Shame welled into a bubble and a gross gurgle popped into her throat.

    “Um…can we pull over?” asked Chat Noir.

    The policeman in the passenger seat looked over his shoulder through the bars. “What for?”

    “I think she’s gonna puke.”

    The car immediately slowed and the lurch of the vehicle almost brought everything up right there in the seat.

    After a panicked struggle with the lock, Ladybug stumbled out of the police car with Chat Noir scrambling over the backseat behind her.

    She heaved wine and shame, dirtying the freshly fallen snow. 

    A hand fell between her shoulder blades, giving her back a rub. 

    “Wow, that’s… a lot of wine. Did you eat Plagg’s cheese?”

    With a sob, she heaved again.

    Gentle claws slipped against the side of her scalp holding back the pieces of hair that had come loose from her pigtails. 

    Ladybug thought for a moment that her mortification would never end and she swore she would never drink again, that she was the worst for drinking when Paris thought Hawkmoth had won, she was so gross, no wonder Chat Noir didn’t want to kiss her.

    “You think I didn’t want to?”

    Oh no, no no no. Did she say that out loud?

    She covered her eyes, rubbing away tears before he could see. She needed to undo this. 

    “Ladybug?”

    And she knew in that moment exactly how, in a world where she didn’t remember Adrien, she could have fallen for Chat Noir. Under all the cocky silliness, he cared so so much. 

    She had thought about Oblivio and that stupid picture a thousand times, mostly in the heavy guise of denial. But ever since fighting Chat Blanc, in that timeline that existed where he knew her as Marinette, where even with her memories of Adrien they had…

    She couldn’t let that happen.

    “I barked,” she rasped.

    Chat Noir was still holding her hair. “What?”

    She wiped her mouth. “I barked all over the snow.”

    “I see that.” He only seemed slightly amused. “Are you seriously making tree puns right now? How much wine did you drink?”

    anonymous

    hey uh i'm sorry if this is annoying but i just wanted to say i really love your ml fanfiction! i don't have an ao3 account so I can't comment there, but i wanted to let you know how well written i think it is and how happy i am when there's a new update !! it's honestly one of my fave fics in the fandom currently sjdfghkgjk

    Oh wow, thank you so much, anon! There is no way that a comment like this is ever annoying! Fanfic authors live, breathe and eat on the feedback of readers, so thank you for the time to drop this in my ask box!

    I wasn't sure anyone reading Evergreen had found my Tumblr yet! I have a sneak peak of the next chapter posted here and will be posting some not so great fanart I drew of the kiddos during last chapters winery scene ;) so please stalk my Tumblr.

    I am about halfway through writing the next chapter and apologize for being painfully slow. But it will be finished, the whole thing is planned and outlined!

    For those of you who are interested in checking it out, basically it's just about some superheroes lost in the woods with no cheese and would you be-leaf some tree puns? Shameless plug below.

    Thanks again dear Anon!

    I quite often get comments on my fanfic that say “I don’t want to quote your whole fic back at you” but you know that? Please do! Because when you quote the parts that you like and add your own comments - whether that’s an in-depth analysis or a series of emojis - just for a second I get the experience of seeing my own writing through someone else’s eyes. I get the tiniest vicarious moment of being the reader rather than the writer. And I love it.

    I am a(n):

    ⚪ Male

    ⚪ Female

    🔘 Writer

    Looking for

    ⚪ Boyfriend

    ⚪ Girlfriend

    🔘 An incredibly specific word that I can't remember

    *wakes up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat*

    WAIT IT’S CALLED A THROW PILLOW

    here is a super helpful website for this kinda thing!

    the first result isn’t always the one you’re looking for but when you press enter it’ll give you a ton of words related to your query that’ll probably have what you’re wanting, or something better

    here’s some examples:

    Reblogging to save a life

    OH MY FUCKING GOD THIS IS THE COOLEST THING I’VE EVER SEEN it’s fully animated, it’s Michael Buble, it’s beautiful, I’m gonna watch this over and over again If someone can find this person’s Tumblr/Instagram please let me know I need to follow them

    OH MY FREAKING CAMEMBERT THIS IS SO GOOD! I’VE WAITED FOR THE FINAL VIDEO FOR MONTHS AND IT’S FINALLY OUT! 

    WATCH IT, GUYS, <>WATCH IT<>

    HOLY SHIZZLESTICKS SKJXJXJEJSJEJXJSDJJSJE OMGGGGG I GENUINELY FORGOT HOW TO BREATHE FOR A SEC THERE AHAHAHA AHHHHHHHHHH

    The moment people were like “oh shit water benders”

    soong-leela

    I really loved this episode though, it was an established theme in the show that firebenders are associated with death and waterbenders are associated with life and healing, and up to this point it all seemed so clear-cut, because fire obviously destroys everything in its path while water can put out fires and heals, as we’ve seen particularly in Katara’s case with her natural healing ability.  

    Then we meet Hama, who due to years of torture and hatred has found a way to turn the classic gentler waterbending ways into a weapon of destruction and manipulation, and honestly I can’t think of a better way to introduce people to the fact that things are never as clear cut as they seem.  We’ve thought of waterbenders as the good guys up until this point, so it’s jarring to find out that no, despite stereotypes and traditions, there are always going to be good and bad people in every culture/group, but that’s the point of the entire show.

    It’s revisited later too when Aang and Zuko find the Sun Warriors who teach them firebending is not just about death and destruction, but also about bringing warmth to the earth and making plants grow and both Aang and Zuko needed to hear that they weren’t just instruments of destruction and gain confidence from the idea of using firebending to create lifeand I lov<>e it I love this show so <>much.

    also worth mentioning: the flowers in this episode were specifically called “fire lilies,” and a swathe of blackened plants is generally also what it looks like when fire comes through and destroys and area. It’s showing that not only can water be used in dangerous and harmful ways, but also that water and fire are not as inherently opposite as they seem.

    This show was and still is absolutely brilliant

    I think the Hunger Games series sits in a similar literary position to The Lord of the Rings, as a piece of literature (by a Catholic author) that sparked a whole new subgenre and then gets blamed for flaws that exist in the copycat books and aren’t actually part of the original.

    Like, despite what parodies might say, Katniss is nowhere near the stereotypical “unqualified teenager chosen to lead a rebellion for no good reason”.  The entire point is that shes not leading the rebellion. She’s a traumatized teenager who has emotional reactions to the horrors in her society, and is constantly being reined in by more experienced adults who have to tell her, “No, this is not how you fight the government, you are going to get people killed.” She’s not the upstart teenager showing the brainless adults what to do–she’s a teenager being manipulated by smarter and more experienced adults. She has no power in the rebellion except as a useful piece of propaganda, and the entire trilogy is her straining against that role. It’s much more realistic and far more nuanced than anyone who dismisses it as “stereotypical YA dystopian” gives it credit for.

    And the misconceptions don’t end there. The Hunger Games has no “stereotypical YA love triangle”–yes, there are two potential love interests, but the romance is so not the point. There’s a war going on! Katniss has more important things to worry about than boys! The romance was never about her choosing between two hot boys–it’s about choosing between two diametrically opposed worldviews. Will she choose anger and war, or compassion and peace? Of course a trilogy filled with the horrors of war ends with her marriage to the peace-loving Peeta. Unlike some of the YA dystopian copycats, the romance here is part of the message, not just something to pacify readers who expect “hot love triangles” in their YA. 

    The worldbuilding in the Hunger Games trilogy is simplistic and not realistic, but unlike some of her imitators, Collins does this because she has something to say, not because she’s cobbling together a grim and gritty dystopia that’s “similar to the Hunger Games”. The worldbuilding has an allegorical function, kept simple so we can see beyond it to what Collins is really saying–and it’s nothing so comforting as “we need to fight the evil people who are ruining society”. The Capitol’s not just the powerful, greedy bad guysthe Capitol is us, First World America, living in luxury while we ignore the problems of the rest of the world, and thinking of other nations largely in terms of what resources we can get from them. This simplistic world is a sparsely set stage that lets us explore the larger themes about exploitation and war and the horrors people will commit for the sake of their bread and circuses, meant to make us think deeper about what separates a hero from a villain.

    There’s a reason these books became a literary phenomenon. There’s a reason that dozens upon dozens of authors attempted to imitate them. But these imitators can’t capture that same genius, largely because they’re trying to imitate the trappings of another book, and failing to capture the larger and more meaningful message underneath. Make a copy of a copy of a copy, and you’ll wind up with something far removed from the original masterpiece. But we shouldn’t make the mistake of blaming those flaws on the original work.

    A teaser for the next chapter of my MLB fic, Evergreen. Superheroes lost alone in the woods with no cheese. Cuddling, words, wine, eventually an akuma, a reveal & so, so many tree puns. So many.

    Find the story here.

    ...

    Why did loving Chat Noir mean the end of the world? 

    She had almost kissed him. With his stupid cat eared hoodie and his stupid green eyes and his stupid sweet smile and his stupid model hair. And all his stupid words. When she had looked at him then in her tipsy haze, heart bursting from all the moments that had led them there, from a trust and love that went far beyond romance… she wanted to. 

    She wanted to forget Chat Blanc and her responsibilities and know the boy beneath the mask, the incorrigible flirt who made dumb puns and arranged candles on rooftops for her. 

    Was that what made her lean in, tracing the outline of the mask behind his ear? 

    Or was it how, without the magic, she swore she saw Adrien under his hood?

    Her eyelids burned, pricking heat building in the corners.

    Was she really that desperate for a love she couldn’t attain? Why couldn’t she just let Adrien go? Why did it hurt so much to know she should?

    How could she use her kitty like that?

    Why didn’t he let her?

    Her heart slammed into her sternum. Shame welled into a bubble and a gross gurgle popped into her throat.

    “Um…can we pull over?” asked Chat Noir.

    The policeman in the passenger seat looked over his shoulder through the bars. "What for?"

    “I think she’s gonna puke.”

    The car immediately slowed and the lurch of the vehicle almost brought everything up right there in the seat.

    After a panicked struggle with the lock, Ladybug stumbled out of the police car with Chat Noir scrambling over the backseat behind her.

    She heaved wine and shame, dirtying the freshly fallen snow. 

    A hand fell between her shoulder blades, giving her back a rub. 

    “Wow, that’s... a lot of wine. Did you eat Plagg’s cheese?”

    With a sob, she heaved again.

    Gentle claws slipped against the side of her scalp holding back the pieces of hair that had come loose from her pigtails. 

    Ladybug thought for a moment that her mortification would never end and she swore she would never drink again, that she was the worst for drinking when Paris thought Hawkmoth had won, she was so gross, no wonder Chat Noir didn't want to kiss her.

    "You think I didn't want to?"

    Oh no, no no no. Did she say that out loud?

    She covered her eyes, rubbing away tears before he could see. She needed to undo this. 

    “Ladybug?”

    And she knew in that moment exactly how, in a world where she didn’t remember Adrien, she could have fallen for Chat Noir. Under all the cocky silliness, he cared so so much. 

    She had thought about Oblivio and that stupid picture a thousand times, mostly in the heavy guise of denial. But ever since fighting Chat Blanc, in that timeline that existed where he knew her as Marinette, where even with her memories of Adrien they had…

    She couldn’t let that happen.

    “I barked,” she rasped.

    Chat Noir was still holding her hair. “What?”

    She wiped her mouth. “I barked all over the snow.”

    "I see that." He only seemed slightly amused. "Are you seriously making tree puns right now? How much wine did you drink?"

    Based on those tropes where they write their names on a piece of card for the reveal.

    <>Behold!! i have risen!!
    I initially was planning to draw them properly with a serious™ style
    (i even filmed myself for reference )

    But alas i was mapping their movements with placeholder wanky-limb sketches and figured the serious™ style would take too long, so i added their features to the wanky-limb models and called it a day

    This still took 5 days to finish

    Chat “I’m a Hot Teen Model” Noir

    I need everyone to know I’ve been scrolling for AN HOUR just to find this post and reblog it.

    👀