my boyfriend talks in his sleep and I wish it was just cute gibberish but instead it’s TERRIFYING. so far, he has:

    - grabbed me by the shoulder and put his hand over my mouth at 3am and pointed to the wall, whispering “do you see it? the barbed wire.” - woken me up and muttered “he’s here” while staring at my bedroom door - rolled over last night and said “you don’t know what’s out there. You don’t know what’s in the swamp.”

    he’s taken like 20 years off my life.


    Glad to see my lifelong disinterest in golf is paying off


    let me tell you about golf

    i grew up in a little desert valley called Tucson, Arizona, where it only rains 2 inches a year on average. the majority of the city’s water is pumped from an underground aquifer, which took millions of years to fill. one of the biggest conservation efforts in our city was for water, naturally, and i spent a lot of time learning about low flow toilets and 5 minute showers. i learned that filling your sink basin and washing your dishes in that water is less costly than running the tap. i learned that it only takes 2 days without water on the desert for someone to die

    the city was sinking as the aquifer drained. neighborhoods fell into flood zones that didnt exist 10 years ago

    there’s a road called Golf Links in the city and it is lined with golf courses. miles of green grass where grass doesn’t grow, in a valley where it doesn’t rain. why? because the rich white retirees who moved there to stop the aching in their joints decided they should also get to play golf. meanwhile our public schools taught small children like me that taking long showers would kill the world

    let the golf industry burn


    sounds like your recurrent depression is just lazy syndrome. who the fuck cries looking at dirty dishes? grow the fuck up jesus chrisy

    I’m starting a Lazy Syndrome club! Anyone else who has on occasion cried at inanimate objects and definitely does not have “depression” is very welcome to join! Password is ‘jesus chrisy’ 


    i wish birds brought ME presents


    No, but think about this.

    The crows she feeds obviously have their own little lives. They go about their business, and they spot *pretty thing* or /unique thing/ in question. What gets me is that the *first* thing on their minds as recipient of this thing is the little girl that feeds them.

    They spot a thing, and immediately must think, “that nice girl with delicious foodstuffs must have this to show my gratitude.”


    It’s actually more than that, though, if you read the articles or watch the videos. This has taken place over YEARS- it started with these birds following this little girl around because she was a messy eater and it has turned into a ritual for the family. They have a water station and food stations where they daily set out things for these birds and sometimes (but not always), these birds leave ‘payment’ behind for the food.


    These birds are not just taking food and leaving shinies. These birds are watching over this family now. Their lives have become involved. These crows are keeping track of this girl and her mother even when they are out of the yard. How do we know?

    One of them is a photographer, and one day while she was photographing some stuff on a bridge, she dropped her camera’s lenscap over the edge. There was no way she could get it back, so she left it. When she got home, the lenscap was sitting on the edge of one of the feeding stations, waiting for her.

    Not only were the birds following and watching over her, they were smart enough to realize she dropped an Important Thing and cared enough to bring it back to her.


    I could not have asked for more