stuff and things, but mostly stuff
Last update
2023-06-09 23:07:31

    Need to know your opinion on this like….. This is so hard


    ok, legitimately, this is some east coast brainrot


    I think I got to go with the sushi ror me? Pizza and wings are both safe foods and sushi bad vibe texture


    Never got chicken wings

    They are good but i cant handle eating something from the bone and the taste for me isnt something special.

    I like the chicken boobies tho


    This is so important, stories like this need to be told.  The cultural insistence we have that parenthood is some kind of magical bonding that happens every time without exception does real harm to both parents and children, as you can see from some of these stories:

    My father recently told me he never wanted kids, but my mother wanted them. She thought he would love us when we were born.


    I didn’t realize that a maternal instinct is not universal. You know how you see parents in the delivery room and they are crying tears of joy? I felt nothing. […] My boys are well cared for and I am always here for them, but it feels very unnatural and fake and unenjoyable. It is a bit like a retail job you don’t like where you put on a fake persona and slog through it the best you can. I don’t get to leave this job, though. 


    I also thought I wouldn’t mind missing out on all the partying and holidays because I would have the ultimate gift, a child.


    I always said I would never have children. I hate kids..I do. I am just not that type of nurturing person. I was always very careful to make sure protection was in use (condoms, birth control) but I am that .1% and apparently very fertile.  I do not have that natural motherly instinct that all women seem to have, you know..that one that kicks in the moment they know they’re pregnant. I have to work really hard at it and it’s exhausting. I miss my solitude and being able to “check out” of reality from time to time.


    Because kids aren’t the life completer we believe they are.

    Are there people for whom having children completes their lives?  No doubt.  Are there parents for whom the downsides like sleeplessness and loss of personal time are outweighed by the love and joy they feel?  Of course.  Are there people who change their minds about wanting kids once they have them?  Sure.  But that’s not true for everyone.  It doesn’t happen every time, it’s never guaranteed, and the consequences are grievous when people who don’t want children have them anyway trusting that they will love the child and be happy.

    We need to dispel the starry-eyed myths around pregnancy, childbirth, and marriage and create more realistic expectations.  Parenthood is too important a choice for people not to go into it with their eyes open.


    “It doesn’t happen every time, it’s never guaranteed, and the consequences are grievous when people who don’t want children have them anyway trusting that they will love the child and be happy.” 


    There’s a book on this topic that was groundbreaking when it came out, called Regretting Motherhood: A Study by Dr. Orna Donath. The backlash was insane. This is a topic that simply wasn’t discussed, and as the book became more famous (was translated into multiple languages, received a lot of public attention), the responses also became more incendiary. I had the utter honor and pleasure of studying with Orna - she read us some of the death threats she received, in her calm and measured manner, using them to further show just how deeply society expects motherhood of women.

    I haven’t read the book myself, but knowing Orna, and having read some of her other work, I wholeheartedly recommend it.


    I am firmly on team “I love being a parent and my life would be incomplete without this” and I have ALWAYS believed that, when it comes to parenting, a “maybe” is a “no”.

    This shit is ALL the work. And it’s not just that parenting is hard. Parenting makes every. Single. Other. Thing. You want to do harder. I don’t just mean things like saving money. I mean literally going pee. EVERYTHING is harder. And I got a comparatively easy kid.

    I love parenting with my whole life and it brings me untold joy. But dear god do not do this if you aren’t VERY sure you want this.

    The world has many joys I have left behind or put on hold to be a parent. Go and enjoy them! Not everyone needs to parent. But every child born needs a whole lot of parenting.


    I was reading something about Whitestown, Indiana and my eyes nearly popped out of my head thinking it was one of THOSE comically racist towns. Nice to know, at least the name, wasn’t that.


    Racisttown, named after the abolitionist Stopbeing Racist,


    That's nothing. Check THIS shit out




    One of the kids I’m babysitting rn just asked me, “Miss Amy, can I tell you a secret?” and then informed me that his brother does not have blood anymore, because they saw a doctor take it


    Same kid that attended this Sunday’s church service in full vampire bat costume and screeched loudly anytime someone said his name


    Update his two year old brother just handed me a partially squished cockroach


    Today’s secret is “if I carry too many things, I die,” and he definitely, for sure did not tell me that specifically because I asked him to pick up his jacket moments beforehand


    “Where’s the tiger?” the five year old asks, peering around the zoo. “I don’t see him!”

    “Probably he had to get his covid shot,” says the three year old, nodding wisely.


    How could I possibly forget this exchange

    “You can’t play with my skunk,” says the three year old, snatching the toy from the five year old. “Mr. Skunk doesn’t like you.”

    “Whoa, whoa,” I say, while driving. “Mr. Skunk likes everyone!”

    The three year old makes direct eye contact with me in the rear view mirror. “Except the police,” he says darkly.


    Overwhelmed! When the five year old learned that I’m having a bad day today, he immediately asked me to take him home so he can “get us a snack and help with whatever you want to do today.”

    The three year old has offered to carry all the backpacks into the house, despite his former statements re: dying if asked to carry his own belongings


    Today the two year old stole the headphones I always wear, put them on upside down, and ran away yelling “hi Babydoll!” over and over, which is in fact how I greet him. I did not come here to be roasted by a toddler


    I recently put a purple streak in my hair! The three year old says that he loves it. He says he loves my brown hair too, because it’s beautiful. I feel very loved and I am going to bake him cookies about it


    The three year old has covid (he’s okay), so I won’t be seeing the children this week :(

    Here's another story from last week instead:

    “Do you want to come make paper airplanes?” the five year old asks. “I have a book that teaches you how.”

    “Sure,” I say, following him upstairs. “I like paper airplanes.”

    “It’ll be easy for you,” the five year old assures me, “because you can-- wait. Can you read?”


    The three year old has recovered <3

    He’s also a little confused by the phrase “playing a trick,” so if he suspects I’m teasing him, he’ll point and yell “you’re tricking!” instead

    Today he told me that I’m “always tricking…… kind of like satan”

    I have never in my life laughed this hard


    Hi! This may actually be the last update on this post because I’m moving cities soon, but with that in mind I have some things to add:

    • The five year old and the three year old both have separate imaginary friends with the same name, which is Speed. They differentiate between Speeds solely by saying my Speed” or “his Speed.” Yes, it does get confusing
    • The three year old’s Speed has a tragic backstory! His childhood home got destroyed by a meteor when he was very young. He also has some level of magical power, which he uses to resurrect himself whenever he dies, which happens often, sometimes at the three year old’s hand
    • When I asked the three year old about his Speed’s resurrection powers, he told me that yes, Speed does knows how to come back to life; Speed does not, however, enjoy coming back to life (because he knows that he will die again, over and over)
    • Their dad is a general contractor, which means that all three toddlers have a really intense relationship with building blocks and also a working knowledge of construction law, which means that I (an attorney) do live a life where every once in awhile I ask a five year old if he’s building skyscrapers and he tells me no, they’re not zoned for commercial
    • Last time I babysat for them, the three year old let me know that they have a new member of their household! Now I did assume this had something to do with their very pregnant mother, but I was wrong— the new member is a third Speed who belongs, of course, to the two year old. His Speed does not, to my knowledge, resurrect
    • Their baby sister was born two hours after that :)

    How old does the sister have to be before she gets a Speed


    The worst thing I ever did at a D&D table was when our DM ran out of place name ideas and told us the name of the port town we needed to go to was "Bar Harbor".

    So I tricked him into roleplaying the slightly-too-helpful town guard into giving us directions to- Well you see, the party has been out in the wilderness for like a MONTH, we're all a mess, the dwarf's beard is out of control, so can you tell us- Where can we find the Bar Harbor Barber?

    But we were not done. We each took turns, like a pack of velociraptors.

    We also had Dryad in the party and a few of her branches got broken in a fight and now her whole canopy is unbalanced and it looks awful, but she really needs to see a specialist, is there a Bar Harbor Arbor Barber?

    The Paladin also wanted to look in on a small church he'd heard of, that the city had a patron saint, who was boiled alive in a cauldron of ale, so where is the temple of the Bar Harbor Larger Martyr?

    It was around this point that Chris started to tire of this nonsense.

    The bard, naturally, wanted to go carousing, and he'd heard this town had some of the most attentive and welcoming Ladies of the Night on the continent, known by thier brightly colored stocking bands, so had he seen any of the Bar harbor Ardor Parlor Farber Garters?

    Chris immediately escalated to threats of a Total Party Kill.

    Unfortunately, I'd had time to prepare and-

    "What do you want?"

    "I just wanted to know if you'd seen my cousin."

    "...Your cousin?"

    "Yeah, I know it's a long shot, but he's got a pretty distinctive appearence and you might have seen him around town."

    "Oh No-"

    "Okay so he's Welsh and the whole family used to be in the wagon-making business but he got into clothes manufacture until there was an accident with a lamp black dye and now he's permanently stained a sooty color and that really turns heads, so now he's got a job drawing in crowds for the city funded swap meet- no, not the Drow that also works there, I mean like the inside of a fireplace- anyway, he got tired of people mixing the two of them up so he started wearing this fancy armor with a magical +1 charisma bonus-"

    "Gallus I swear to God I *WILL* Summon the Tarraqsue-"

    "-So have you seen my cousin, Arthur Carter, former Sartor but now he's the Darker Harker for the Charter Barter of Bar Harbor, the one with the Charmer Armor?"

    Amazingly, we survived the Tarrasque.


    You do realise Bar Harbor is a real place, right? It’s in Maine:


    Important Clarification:

    Chris the DM is FROM Bar Harbor, Maine.

    We did this to his Home Town.


    hope this uploads i need you guys to see this potion


    “don’t tell the president I’m doing this, he’ll cancel my citizenship”


    “pursue your dumb ideas”


    Potion of Time Stop [Cursed Item, Legendary] As an action you can consume this potion. This briefly stops the flow of time for everyone but yourself. No time passes for other creatures, while you take 1d4 + 1 turns in a row, during which you can use actions and move as normal. When the spell ends, you die instantly.


    Infantilize your cats, there’s nothing they can do about it lmao, if you don’t wanna be treated like a baby then why baby shaped?


    @dicaeopolis here’s a medal for being the absolute most correct person on this hell site 🏅


    @teseo-trolls-u if you post to all your friends a constant photo stream of every single time your child does something adorable, embarrassing, or completely mundane w comments like "so stupid" "stinky" or "just like me" you are gonna traumatize your child forever. If you do this with a cat its fine and even funny. But nobody talks about this


    If you want to watch your children beat the shit out of each other in very funny ways, get a couple of bonded cats. It's very entertaining. Can't do that with human children.


    “if you take medication for that, you’ll be taking medication all your life!!” yeah, and?? bud, i already put on my glasses every morning. it’s like. a condition of mine, not a side hobby i’m pursuing irresponsibly. 


    and the thrilling sequel: “taking meds for that is the easy way out!” right you are my dude, i’m a huge fan of not making things harder than they have to be


    i love abortion and i love divorce


    i pop some pills and i ride my horse


    i log onto tumblr and i start discourse


    eyyyy macarena


    this has the strongest 2014 tumblr vibe i’ve seen in a while, can’t believe this post is 5 days old




    happy 9 day anniversary to this post 💖


    date of origin: April 18, 2021


    #it even has a deactivated blog

    Look at that subtle off-kilter humour… the tasteful length of the reblog chain… oh my god, it even has a deactivated blog


    i cant speak for other polyam people but being in a triad/throuple relationship in real life is just inherently funny. show up to the family function with two guys and everyone else has one guy. just seems like a power move every time even though we're just living our lives. hilarious. i recommend this for comedic value alone


    i love tumblr if i had made this post on twitter someone would have tried to murder me in the streets


    John: everyone is suspicious especially Martin. I can’t trust anyone, he is 100% conspiring against me. I must stay vigilant

    Martin: I have a crush on John


    John: I miss my friends dearly, I’ve pushed so many people away with my paranoia, I’m so lonely and I wish Martin would just TALK to me, but there’s nothing to do but more forwards and try to keep my friends safe this time

    Martin: im still in love with Jon but I’m busy manipulating fear entities


    Related: at a neuroscience conference I was at once there was a talk on how the "microslippages" against your fingertip when you lightly pinch something are generally enough for you to work out exactly how much force to grip it with to lift it without crushing it or dropping it.


    [ID/A tweet by Cliff 🦖 [dinosaur emoji] Jerrison (@ pervocracy) saying "one of the most amazing things a human brain can do is when you shake an opaque bottle and get an idea of how full it is by how the weight shifts. there's got to be incredible math going on under the hood there" /End ID]


    I am very serious if a game both negatively impact your mental health and is the source of all your joy, it means you have an addiction problem and you need to delete your account and uninstall it and cry for however many hours you need to get it out of your system.

    Your lifeline CANNOT depend on a mobile game they're predatory as fuck.


    I'm not here to be like mobile game bad evil. But if you love something, you need to 1) recognize it's flaws and 2) cultivate a healthy relationship with it.

    Think of your hobbies as a relationship. If your friend is constantly trying to extort your money and is making you feel awful whenever you're not giving them your full attention or failed the tasks they gave you, then you probably wanna set some boundaries with that friend no matter how much you love them.

    That's the boundaries you need to set with your mobile games.

    If you don't wanna quit cold turkey here's what I suggest.

    • Quit for a week. Deliberately break the habit and miss a event. Afterwards if you wanna go back, you still can.
    • Get an app blocking app and control/monitor how many hours you spend on the game
    • Get into a new interest or hobby with a friend. Can be a long running show or a hobby. Something that isn't addictive substance or gambling. Use that to distract yourself as you set your distance from the game.

    Anti-addiction PSAs regarding mobile games always focus on how much money people are spending. And that's an adult problem. It's bad but it's not all of it.

    Increasingly I am also seeing young people who doesn't spend a cent but has their mental health hanging on their performance/participation of these games. And you deserve to know that's also an addiction issue. Ultimately it's up to you how you choose to deal with it.